Lake Life

“What took you so long mate? I died three years ago,” a voice called out from a lounge chair on the deck.

Len barely thought before speaking. “I’m sorry?” he said, standing with one foot on the deck and one on the last step up. He paused to take in the full features of his dead friend lounging comfortably. He looked good, really good. Better than ever before. 

Len's eyes dashed back and forth between the lake view and his friend. He stood doing that for a long moment and gathered words together in his head to make a sentence. “What's going on Eric? You're alive?” 

“I go by Dallas now, but yeah, I am alive. So what took you so long? Three years mate. I thought I’d get a chance to explain things sooner.” He sounded madder than he looked. He smiled, “it was my dying wish and all, for you to come up here like old times, ya know,” Eric said, standing up slowly from his chair. 

 Len frowned, feeling a sense of guilt that had been nagging at him the whole car ride. Three years. It had been too long. 

He fumbled to find an excuse.“It's not exactly close to home, and besides, I had a kid, like right after you died. It’s not that easy to just drop what I’m doing to get here, you know.” He paused, catching his own tone. “Can we discuss the fact that you're supposed to be dead anyway?” Len asked, moving fully onto the deck finally. His hands dropped to his side after white knuckling the handrail. He gave them a brief glance and watched the white skin turn red. 

Eric took a deep breath and smiled as he poured two cups of black coffee from a french press and then looked out over the lake. The expanse of autumn trees lined the sunlit water. “I died alright, and brother, best believe I was reborn!” Eric said. He took an exaggerated sip of his coffee, laughed, and pushed the other cup over towards Len. 

“But,” Len said, cutting himself off. Just for his own sanity he pushed Eric’s shoulder and felt the weight of his body resist. He was there, alive. 

“Yup,” Eric sighed. “Alive and in the flesh, yours truly.” 

Len looked out over the water and took a sip of his coffee. It was perfect. The coffee, the lake, the afternoon sunlight. It was like any other trip they had taken up there in the past. It was a trip he thought he would take only one more time to say goodbye to his childhood friend. 

“I was afraid that the new owners were not going to let me onto the deck,” Len said.

“Yeah, new owners, over my dead body,” Eric laughed. “No pun intended.” He lit a cigarette and offered Len one. 

Len lit his cigarette off of his friend’s and they stood in silence for a long while. Slow ripples moved the water and a light breeze took leaves from the trees and drifted them down towards the lake. 

Len’s questions piled up in his mind as his friend acted as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. He thought carefully how to proceed. 

“So, you never died? Right? You didn’t come back to life. You just never died?” The questions poured out of him in rapid fire. 

“No, bro, I never actually died, that would be crazy. I just came up with a good plan, that’s kind of what I do best.” 

“Right, of course.” Len frowned. “But, why?” he finally asked. 

“Why? Bro, I hated my life. Hated my family. You knew them, greedy, selfish, self absorbed. They didn't even love me. They loved my money. That much is certain.” He took a deep drag from his cigarette and then flicked it into the lake. 

“But, how?” Len asked. 

“Well, it did take some doing, but the annual trip to the beach, the prevalence of sharks that year. It just kind of lined up perfectly.” 

“And, the leg? Mate, they only found your leg.” 

Eric laughed from his belly. “Yeah, well the leg had to go from diabetes already. That much I hadn't told anyone yet, kind of out of embarrassment. And you know, you might be surprised what kinds of doctors you can find swayed by two point five mil.” 

“The kind that will amputate your leg and let you keep it?” Len asked in horror. 

Eric lifted up his pants and showed Len his prosthetic leg. He tapped it with his lighter. The two friends couldn't help but laugh like children. 

“Why didn't you just get a divorce?” Len asked. 

“Oh, boy. You know Jeanette. She would have bled me dry and still never stopped calling me for more. And the girls, well I don't know what planet they live on, but I am not going to be paying for their lifestyles of non-reality forever. Honestly, what is wrong with them? The phones dude, the phones! Plus, I would always have to try to live up to the shame of divorcing their mother through the holy act of taking them to the mall, or better yet just giving them my credit card and getting out of the way.” Eric sighed. 

“So how do you even have any money left? It doesn't seem like you left your family in any financial strain. ” 

“Yeah, well, I can always make more, I mean, Dallas is just as good at starting businesses as Eric was, even better without the distraction of a family.” 

“So you restarted, from scratch?”

“No way. A few years before all of this went down, I started up a business in the cleaning lady’s name. I got her a little house up here for her cooperation. She takes care of rental properties around the lake to make it more believable. I funneled millions into the cleaning business, vans, warehouses, rental properties, that kind of thing. Needless to say, I’m set.” Eric smiled at his friend and put his hand on his shoulder. “It's great to see you, Len. Enough about me, how have you been? A kid?” 

“Yeah, never thought it would happen, a son.” Len smiled. 

“You've got a good wife my friend, how is she?” 

“She’s good, Eric. There's something I have to tell you though.” Len put his cigarette out in his fingers. “She’s here Eric, in the car. I told them I was going to chat with the owners before they got out of the car.” 

A look of panic shot across Eric’s face. “Mate you've gotta get her out of here, she'll tell Jeanette and this whole thing will be over.” 

“Um, Eric. That's not all. Jeanette is here too, and your daughters. They are in the car. We are renting a house together down the street and just stopped here first.” 

“I specifically told you to come alone!” Eric said. 

“I can't just take a vacation alone Eric! I’m married!” Len said, trying to keep his voice down. 

“It was my dying wish mate.” 

“I'm here aren't I?” 

“With my ex wife, I mean, my wife, and kids, that was not part of my dying wish.” 

“They wanted to come! They wanted to feel some sense of something that was important to you. Jeannette has not been the same. The girls miss you. When I said I was coming here they all begged me to come. What was I supposed to say? And you're supposed to be dead.”

Len stopped talking when the sound of car doors opening and closing started a symphony from the other side of the house. 

“I gotta hide, you have to leave. Come back in three years or something. It was good to see you, Len.” Eric started to crouch down and duck walk along the deck towards the back door. He was inches away when the sound of footsteps hit the deck stairs. 

“Dad?” a girl's voice wavered through the air.

“Oh, hey Sweetie!”