The Girl

It was the perfect day to go out. The weather was cloudy, but not too cold, the sky still had large patches of blue scattered throughout, and it was far enough into spring that most of the flowers had begun to bloom. It was for these reasons that I decided to go for a jog.

That’s what I tried to tell myself at least. The truth was I was desperate to be out of the house before Dave woke up. It’s not that I didn’t love him anymore, I knew I did, but neither of us would deny that things had been difficult lately. It just seemed easier to avoid him rather than risk another stupid fight. I dressed quietly in the bathroom and snuck out the back door to avoid making too much noise.

Whatever my intentions were, it really was a beautiful day to go to the park. It was getting to that time of year where everyone wanted to be out and doing something. People walked past me with dogs of all shapes and sizes, old people sat on the benches and tossed some bread crumbs to the local birds, parents were huffing and puffing trying to keep up with their young children. It looked like some of the parents were getting a better workout than I was.

It was such a lively scene, fun to watch. Which is why I wasn’t really paying attention where I was jogging. When I looked back to the sidewalk I saw a little girl right in front of me. I almost stumbled over myself stopping so I wouldn’t run into her. She turned to look at me. She didn’t say anything. I waited for a moment, but she only stared at me.

“Hi there, can I help you?” I asked

She didn’t say anything. I glanced around the park. I didn’t see anyone nearby and it didn’t seem like anyone was missing a child. Did she lose her way looking for the bathroom or something?

“Sweetheart, are you lost?” I asked. “Where are your parents?”

Again, she said nothing. I was really starting to get creeped out. Maybe I should just go around her. Her parents would find her eventually, and people in this neighborhood were friendly. 

Suddenly, she raised her hand and pointed up at me. I looked around in the direction she was pointing to see if something was behind me, but nothing was there. What did she want exactly? She lowered her hand and instead placed it over her stomach, rubbing it.

“Oh!” I cried, suddenly realizing. “No, I’m sorry. I don’t have any food, and you shouldn’t take food from strangers. Go find your parents, they’ll feed you.”

She stared at me again, but I was done with this one-sided conversation by now. I went around her cautiously. She didn’t try to follow, just watched me as I walked. I began jogging again. When I finally looked back she was gone.

I felt a little bad, but I was sure she’d be fine. She didn’t look homeless or anything, she probably got separated from her parents somewhere. I wished I could have helped a little more, but I really didn’t bring any food to give. My stomach roared as if to emphasize this fact. 

Maybe I should have at least grabbed a granola bar before leaving the house. I sighed. Were things really so bad between us I didn’t even feel like I could risk sticking around for breakfast? When did things start to get this way between us? Dave and I had only been married for three years. Shouldn’t “having marital problems” take longer than this? Although, I guess they can happen anytime.

The thing that bothered me most was I didn’t even understand why we fought so much. Small things suddenly became big. It wasn’t like it was just him though, even I noticed I had kind of a short fuse lately. We were only really arguing about one big thing, and was it really so big it was affecting the rest of our lives? Apparently, it was.

A pretzel cart appeared up ahead, and my roaring stomach broke my mind from these thoughts. Luckily, I did grab my change purse before leaving the house. I always kept a little spare cash in it for times like this. I bought a couple pretzels and a bottle of water. I walked over to an empty bench nearby and sat down. It didn’t take me long to finish the first one, I guess I was really hungry. I was about to start my second when I started feeling strange. I didn’t feel sick, more like I felt a change in the air. I looked around. 

I nearly jumped out of my skin. To my right was the same little girl from before. I didn’t even notice she walked up. She still didn’t say anything, but she was smiling now. I couldn’t tell if this was worse or better, but I decided to try being nice at least.

“Oh, hey,” I said, smiling at her. “Did you find your parents? Did you eat yet?”

She still kept quiet but pointed at me again. This kid was really creepy. I was about to turn away when I remembered the pretzel in my hand. She put her hand back over her stomach and rubbed it. Oh right, I didn’t have food before. Maybe she was still hungry. Well, whatever, they were pretty big so I felt okay after having one, I could give her the other.

“Here,” I said, handing it to her, “take it.”

I thought she would take it and runoff, but she still continued to stare and rub her stomach. Alright, officially a weird and creepy kid. I unfolded the napkin it came with and set the pretzel on top of it on the bench.

“I have to go,” I said, “take it if you want.”

I quickly stood and jogged off again. I glanced back. It looked like the girl was gone. Was she just shy or something? I sighed. This is why I didn’t really want kids. They were weird, they couldn’t really communicate, and I had never been very good with them. Why couldn’t Dave understand my point of view?

I wanted to think it wasn’t a big deal, but I guess having or not having kids is always a big issue in a relationship. It’s not like I lied to him. If he had asked me any time when we were dating I would have told him I didn’t want any. Now, somehow, I was being unreasonable. Depriving him of something.

I get that he wanted kids, but it was my body too. I was the one who would have to carry it, I was the one who would have to give birth to it, and I was the one who would still have to be a mother to it after. Who was he to force all that stress, physical trauma, and responsibility on to me just because it felt “unfair” to him?

I had reached the end of the park by now. I glanced at my watch. Just past eleven now. If I jogged back, then by the time I got home it would be almost twelve-thirty. Hopefully, he would have eaten lunch and gone into his den by then. I really didn’t want to be out all day again avoiding him. I turned around and started jogging back toward the other entrance.

I was really starting to sweat now. The weather wasn’t very hot, but all the jogging was starting to get to me. I was kind of glad I bought the water, I forgot to bring some. I was really going to have to start preparing better if I was going to keep doing this. I unscrewed the lid and gulped down about half of it. When I finally lowered the bottle I noticed someone up ahead in the distance. I felt my heart skip a beat. It was the girl.

I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to talk with her again, but I wanted to get out of here and go home already. I sighed. I was being ridiculous, this was a child. I closed the lid and kept jogging forward. As I got closer I could see her more clearly. No, it wasn’t just that she was a creepy kid that made me feel uncomfortable around her, something about her seemed off. She somehow seemed familiar, but I was sure I’d never met her before. 

It wasn’t long before I reached her. I paused. I could just go around, she didn’t follow me the last time, I think. She stared at me. Something so familiar, but I couldn’t quite place it. I gave a frustrated sigh and crossed my arms.

“Look, kid,” I said, annoyed, “you’ve been following me around all day. It’s getting weird. Do I know you? And where are your parents? Aren’t they worried?”

Surely by now, someone had to be missing this kid, but I still hadn’t heard anyone shouting for a kid or looking around frantically. Who did she belong to? She raised her hand and again pointed at me. I glared.

“Look, what do you want?” I asked. 

Again, she put her hand to her stomach and rubbed it. I felt anger building inside me. What was this kid's problem?

“I left you food already!” I shouted. I glanced down and noticed my water. “Are you thirsty? Here, take it and go away.”

I handed her the water, but she didn’t take it. She just stared at me, rubbing her stomach. She smiled. God, something about this damn kid was so familiar. Before, it made me curious, but now I was getting pissed. She wasn’t talking, she wasn't playing, she wasn’t doing anything. Why was she following me? Anger suddenly filled me and I threw the bottle at her.

“Just take it already!” I screamed.

The bottle bounced against her forehead. She cried out and grabbed her head. I felt a sharp pang in my stomach as she did. What the hell was going on? She looked up at me, tears forming in her eyes. They were blue, a very deep sapphire color and almost seemed to be sparkling. So familiar, but I swear I’d never seen her before. A drop of blood oozed between them, the bottle had given her a large cut. 

Panic filled me, annoying kid or not I couldn’t just go around assaulting children. I glanced around, no one seemed to notice my outburst. 

“Sorry,” I muttered quickly before jogging off at lightning speed.

I didn’t care who she was anymore. I didn’t care where I knew her from. I just wanted to get away from her. I wanted to go home. I thought of Dave. Maybe this whole weird experience had a silver lining, another reason to give why I didn’t want kids. I couldn’t avoid him forever. Eventually, we had to really talk this out. I didn’t want to lose him over something so stupid, but at the same time, I knew it wasn’t stupid to him.

I slowed down as I reached my street. I was panting heavily. Had I really been running that fast? I walked toward the house slowly. Dave was at the mailbox. He glared a bit as I walked up.

“Good run?” He asked stiffly.

I knew he was annoyed, I left without a word first thing in the morning. I opened my mouth to apologize, but my voice caught in my throat. Dave was staring at me, but something was wrong. Familiar. The pain filled my stomach again, the world started spinning a bit. I leaned over the railing and vomited in the bushes.

“Amber!” He shouted.

I blacked out. I found out the news when I woke up in the hospital. I was pregnant. About four months. I guess the constant jogging had kept the baby weight off and the doctor said some women still manage to have their periods even when pregnant. I heard what he said, but I couldn’t absorb it really. I just put my hand over my stomach and rubbed it nervously. 

Of course, Dave was thrilled when he found out. As strange and unexpected as it was, this baby actually seemed to restore our relationship. He was very loving and attentive for the entire pregnancy. I kept quiet about the incident with the kid in the park. I never saw her again and we were so busy preparing for our own that it didn’t seem to matter anymore. I still wasn’t crazy about the idea of having a kid, but Dave was so happy that, near the end, even I started to look forward to it. 

I gave birth to a healthy baby girl. I was in the room with Dave when the nurse brought her in for us.

“Well, little girl, say hello to your mommy and daddy,” she said cheerfully, handing the baby to me.

“She’s absolutely perfect,” Dave whispered, stroking her head lovingly.

I smiled a little to see him so happy. I glanced down. She was sleeping peacefully. Maybe this would be okay. A loving husband, a nice house, a kid running around.

“Huh, that’s weird,” Dave muttered.

“What is?” I asked.

“Nothing really, just a weird birthmark,” he said, pointing to her forehead. “It almost looks like a cut or something.”

I looked at her head. He was right, it looked as if she had a large scar across her forehead. Suddenly, she opened her eyes. Dave’s eyes. Sapphire blue.