Who to Believe

    A young red haired woman walks up to a podium to thunderous applause. She adjusted the mic and waited for the crowd to settle. She cleared her throat and began to speak.

    “Welcome everyone. Thank you for being here today. We have gathered in this auditorium to talk about who to believe. Who can we listen to for spiritual truth? What system holds the truth we seek? Is there a right answer to any of these questions? Yes, there is a right answer, but the answer is for the individual not for the masses. What is in our hearts and souls. You don’t have to follow the crowd. Religion or spirituality should feel natural, not like an obligation. I want to tell you all a story.

    This story is about a young woman who had spent most of her young life searching for her place. Her place in this world and her place in the spiritual realm. Her name was Trinity. Her mother named her that because of the Holy Trinity. Her family was very religious and her grandmother was raised catholic. 

    Trinity grew up in a family who prayed before every meal and attended church every Sunday night. She always wanted to ride with her grandparents because she liked their Bronco II. It was almost jeep-like but with a short seat in the middle of the back seat. Also, at the time she didn’t have to wear a seatbelt. Not the safest but she hated seatbelts. She grew up to understand why she needed to wear one while in the car.  

    She continued to have some fond memories of growing up in a christian family. She enjoyed the songs because they were written beautifully and with heart. She also grew up watching and loving a cartoon series about stories from the bible through the eyes of children called, SuperBook. 

    Every Sunday after dinner, Trinity would join her family in the pews at the church and listen to the Pastor. In the beginning, she was too young to really understand what she was being told.  As she grew and her comprehension advanced she really started to question the teachings. The stories of the Creation of the Universe, Adam and Eve, and Noah’s Ark really stayed with her and were part of her question. The Creation stayed in her mind as fact but the story of Adam and Eve made her question things more. Two people as the only human on this planet. They were thrown out of the Garden of Eden and had two sons. But she was taught that we all came from these two people. This never made sense because the connotations of this made things gross to Trinity. She was told dating your family was wrong so how could we all be here?

    That was her question and this is where she started to question the teaching of her family and the bible that they held so dear. 

    Trinity grew up trying to follow the line and practice what she had been taught. She was convinced that her understanding was just because she had not had enough education on the subject of her religion. She was taught to spread the word of God and encourage others to join the church. This was uncomfortable and her questions made her attempts to be in vain. She was asked so many questions by family and others that she couldn’t really answer and this frustrated her.

    As time wore on she started to see that the teachings of the church were more indoctrination than about actual religion. She never understood why it seemed like a duty to give money to the church but most of these people never seemed to have the money or urge to help the other people on this planet who really needed the help. She still continued to try and follow her family’s religion. At fourteen she decided to go ahead and make a promise to God and got baptized. It wasn’t until a history class that focused on cultures and beliefs around the world that Trinity started to realize that she had a choice.

     She continued the study she had started in school. The fascination grew as she looked for her place. She compared all the religions and found the similarities and differences. She was looking for truth and understanding. 

    Trinity found the Wiccan beliefs system and it felt right at the time. She studied the processes of practice and teachings for years before she settled on the system. She wanted to understand everything that she could because she wanted to answer the questions others would have as they had when she was younger and being a christian. The Wiccan beliefs made Trinity Feel like she was really finding herself. While she was starting to really practice Wiccan, Trinity really started to understand and feel in with the teachings of Buddha. Trinity starts to find more and more peace as she implements the teachings of Buddha and the Wiccan Beliefs. 

    Finding this peace and place did not stop Trinity's studies into religions and spiritual beliefs. She was now faciated on how these systems evolved throughout the years and how they started. She saw how people from different parts of the world who had no contact with anyone outside their communities had many of the same basic beliefs. She also noticed that later systems seem to have just stolen systems from others, rebranded and then demonized the other belief system.

    Trinity’s revelations did separate her from her family more. this was because they all thought that it was just witchcraft in which they believed was just evil. She tried to explain the differences of the different branches and that there could not be a blanket statement made about all practitioners of the Wiccan religion. After a while she just stopped talking about it. 

    Through all of this she continued to look for the place where she belonged. Even as identifying as a Wiccan, Trinity still didn’t feel like she was in the right place. It was close but not quite right. The rules didn’t make sense. So she just kept looking. That is when she realized that her beliefs were broader and less organized than Wiccan. Paganism offers the flexibility and peace that she was seeking. She didn’t have to stick to one pantheon or a set of rituals to be intune with her higher powers. This helped her find the Gods and Goddesses that would give her the guidance she needed. Paganism is inside of you and in the connections formed with the natural world. Just like those who came before who wanted to explain the world around them.

    Admitting her revelations made Trinity feel more like who she was supposed to be all along. The worries that seemed to consume everyone around her didn’t weigh on Trinity anymore. When a person is out of work and the bills are due they start to freak out and stress over what they should do next. Trinity felt that everything would work out and that she would be able to take care of what she needed to. Was it hard? Of course it was. Money makes the world go round and when you don’t have it, life gets sticky. Stressing over it just makes a person crazy and they make themselves sick over it. Trinity understood that when she was not working she needed to focus on what made her happy and to search for something else. Obviously that other line of work wasn’t for her or else she would still be there. It was time to move on and look elsewhere for a place. She allowed herself to dream and believe that those dreams would come true. She understood that she was feeling this way because she was connected to the universe and the Gods and they were watching out for her. They would not let her fall. They would guide her and make sure she would make it.

    She was still an outcast because everyone around was focused on GOD and thought everyone else should be as well. Trinity loved country music but most in the Country community are Patriotic Christians. Trinity agreed with Patriotism but could not stand when people preached to her. She felt under represented and demonized just because she didn’t no believe in their God. It took her some time but she learned how to appreciate the music that talked about God for its beauty instead of just the message. She learned to ignore the preaching and just listen to the information. Trinity had found her place and didn’t care what others thought of her beliefs because she believed in her spirituality like they believed in God.

    We all have to remember, one day this will all end and we will see the afterlife. There might be thousands of groups standing around realizing they were wrong. There might be one group seeing they were right all along. Everyone could be wrong, everyone could be right, or one group will be right while the rest rethink what they had thought. It doesn’t matter what you believe. as long as that belief makes you feel better and gives you purpose in life and comfort in your after life. As long as you're not hurting others or animals, find what your heart and soul are calling out for. You are not alone, there are many out there who believe the way you believe.”

    The young red haired woman finished her speech. The crowd jumped from their seats and applauded for several minutes after she had left the podium.