The blind date

                                                                  The blind date.

John sat at the back of the dinner so he could watch who came and went. Not that he did not sit here all the time, he did. Today however was different, today was the big day. Not only had he positioned himself here to see who came and went, nut so he could see the large clock that hung on the wall. He looked at the clock, ah it’s only five past and still another twenty minuets or so before they arrive. OK check list, I have the rolled up newspaper and I also have the hat (on the table) so every thing is going to be fine. Well that’s what he kept telling himself, all will go well. He took out his phone to log on to the dating web site to check her profile once more, and if truth be tolled to check on the time. When suddenly he was snapped back to the here and now with a Can I get you anything else mister? It was the waitress, well in truth the only one not on their break. Can I have a coffee and a Danish please, yes you can and how would you like your coffee? I take my coffee like I take my woman, strong and black. She stood staring at him for a moment or two. He sighed knowing that the film reference he had used had gone way over her head. I take it you have not seen Aeroplane then. She shook her head No I don’t watch too many old films, but I will ask granny if it was any good. He watched as she made her way back to the counter. Not so much of a glide but more of a force of nature. Not that he thought she was fat, no by any stretch of the imagination, she was just a force to be reckoned with.

Across town she paced the hallway as she waited for her friend to arrive. The bell chimed out and she opened the front door to her friend. MY, MY, MY, she said don’t we look the part then. Now are we going now or do we have time for a drink? Do you really think I look nice in this? I can put the yellow number on if you want? Do you think that would look better? Ok said Sally, take a deep breath and count to five for me. WHAT ? are you having me on? NO replied Sally just do it, please. Remember just how we practiced it? In through the nose and out through the mouth, and don’t forget to count. Now remember it will be just how we planned it. You go in first and I will give you thirty minuets or so to test the waters, then I will come in. If it’s not going well you can call me over, if not then we can meet in the ladies and take it from there OK? She nodded and was about to speak when she was stopped. Now let me look at you she said grabbing both her shoulders. For the love of Mary you could have put a bit of lippy on and bet you haven’t put you fried eggs in have you? No she replied they always make me feel like everyone is looking at me. Sally sighed well she said you need something, even my hubby has bigger tits than you.  I take it you have got your best bra on? Well you never know, a little something for the weekend madam? You have a photo I can look at? She retrieved her phone from her purse  and flashed up the photo on the app. Not bad Sally said If you don’t want him can I have a play with him for a while? Sally what would hubby say? Nothing, cause he won’t know will he? You would eat him up and spit out the bones, and I’m not sure that sort of cruelty is not against the Geniver convention. Now said Sally it’s time to go, you ready? As I’m ever going to be.

The trip across town went as smooth as always, the road works where still there but the traffic was light. She sighed looking out of the window, you will be fine. Sally said in a reassuring voice, want the radio on? You know I was just thinking what a nice day it is. I am glad it’s not raining, It always makes people shrink a bit. You know like they have crawled in to themselves. She sighed again and asked if they could listen to Sally’s I-Pod instead of the radi, It doesn’t matter any way she replied as we will be there soon.  That’s a bit of luck there is a parking space there and the café is just up the way. OK I will give you about 30 minuets before I come in, if you need me to be there any quicker just speed dial me. She took a deep breath and got out of the car. You will do fine Sally chirped in as she closed the door. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest and her hands where starting to sweat. No it’s not sweat she corrected herself, ladies don’t sweat they perspire. Well this is it as she reached the door, took a deep breath, opened it and went in. It was almost nice to be inside, as they had air conditioning making the heat outside bearable. She look around the room, scanning for him. There where a few groups of mainly older people sitting around their cups of tea. There was someone sitting at the back reading a news paper, but something looked odd about them. Who on earth would buy two newspapers and leave one rolled up in front of you on the other side of the table? Only if you where waiting for….. OH my. I fell faint, deep breath she thought and show a bit of control. She waited what seemed like an age, when if fact it was only about 25 seconds. Now remember what Sally had said, be nice smile and don’t say anything you would not post on social media. She walked over to the table and coughed. The newspaper was promptly lowered and folded and the man stood. Before we continue can I say just how charming you look and I have taken the liberty of ordering some coffee and pastries. Now please take a seat and we can start to get to know each other and see where that takes us.