The Modern Telephone

Remember the old-fashion game of telephone? The information services game where kids sit in a circle and the first player begins conversation with a secret or some other juicy tidbit about a person, friend or acquaintance. Someone in their new(s) orbit.

The adult version gossip game being the equivalence of a National Enquirer or People Magazine. Mag Rags. There was no board to play on, no real tangible skill required. No strings or cups allowed. No handwritten, typed or notes allowed. Definitely pictures, drawn or photographed not attached. No device present.

Right up front, at the start, the playing field is leveled. The kids collectively set comfortably next to one another on the floor in an agreed upon circle.

Hands to yourself except when it is your turn to pass along the secret. No talking allowed. Until it is your turn.

The game instructions involved: A short story or tidbit maybe even a secret (makes the new(s) all the more enticing and interesting) started by the leader. Moving clockwise, the first person shares a whispered secret to the next person. Speaking in low, quiet tones, tiny-voice sounds to the next person. Usually covering their own mouths and ears at the same time to “protect the message” and its contents.

As the message made its way around the circle, the savviest of the

participants provided the opportunity to watch the facial expressions and responses of the others. Generally, the rules of the game require that the person passing the secret along can repeat the message once. And then you are on your own to repeat it to the next person in line.

Depending on the traffic-the amount of participants sharing the message-is the possibility of the message being passed on accurately. No phone receiver to talk into or hear from. Just hands free. Not modern “ hands free”. Mind you.

Laughs and giggles are allowed. In good faith. That is the reason for sitting in a circle. For playing the game together. There were probably strategic persons, even in youth, that would take the opportunity to “trick” others, intentionally skew the message—to promote the message into the labyrinth of messages. For fun, for chance, for whatever reason. The apple may not fall far from the tree. We are and can be products of our environments, after all. Or better still, the astute-minded disciplined-intended conveyance by taking the high road. Speak clearly and succinctly.

It is called a game for a reason. With youth and acumen not yet developed. To its full potential. Perhaps the giggles and laughs increase mid-way through the circle. And expressions of wide-eyed looks thinking, “What did you say? Did you really say that!. And I have to pass that on…???,,,!!!”

Depending on the number of participants, the message makes its way around the circle, up and perhaps down the labyrinth. Oftentimes through a maze of questions, and not-so-sure looks. Side eyed glances of not wanting to spread what I think I just heard.

Winding its way around the message spoken in tiny voices and whispers, and eager ears awaiting their turn. If not spoken succinctly, the complicated, confusing, elaborate message nears its end with the final participant being the one to repeat it.

Trust is not an option. It is not a game of competition. It is a listening and hearing game. Even youth draw conclusions. Let’s see what happens as the message circles ‘round……words don’t mean, people mean…..?

No worries. If the game goes on long enough, every one gets a turn at creating the initial message. If they want a turn. But once in the circle. The complications, and elaboration may rear their uneven heads. The acceptance of the game which drew you in to play is enticing in and of itself. And oh so exciting. Because now I belong.

Johnny, Jenny or Joey or Jenna not quite realizing the maze itself is the pathway of the secret being spread around the circle. Youth is wasted on the young. Innocence still preserved. The final person repeats the message as heard from the others at play.

“No way!” “Really?” giggle, giggle, squirm, squirm. “That is not what I said”, cries from participants in the circle. Some punches and good-natured shoves to the friends to the left and right. And laughs and, O.K. let’s continue the game with a new(s) message. New leader. And participants now holding different chain positions in the circle game of The Telephone Game.

The Modern Telephone used by our youth today requires a very different set of skills of “listening” and “hearing”. Connection involves a serious foundation of skillful, advance discernment IQ and decision making. Intensive responsibility and discipline. It can age them beyond their years before knowing what hit them. “Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.” The message ringing in their own ears.

But many times, the lines are so blurred and buried in the labyrinth, cooperation and confusion is not the intended order of the day. Exhaustion.

The desire bubbles up to launch the device at the wall and ask,

“Good Lord, when is snack time?” I, indeed am starving and I do not know why..? Did my Mom or Dad pack my lunch, where am I to go to eat it,. On the playground, what is a playground? Shall I make my way to the lunchroom. This used to be the social teaching of the day—how to navigate sharing a meal with classmates and then going out to”play”. But. I can’t. My mind is 1000 miles away.

I do not think I can even chew.

“I cannot launch my phone, because it is my constant appendage and others will think I am not cool. This darn thing is tethered to me like a ball and chain. And I am tired from lugging it around. But I have to look cool. See and tweet, Watch the tube, instantly gram my insta. What language am I even speaking anyhow.

I forgot to eat. And I. Need a Nap. And I am only 9 or 10. What happened to my youth? Why am I so stressed? Why is everything I see on a tiny little screen. My head hurts. But I need to stay cool. Keep scrolling baby. The next secret is in here somewhere. The next important new(s) of the day. I need to know NOW. I feel rushed with a sense of impulse. I need to know the feed of the day. Or else am I a loser.?

I hope I will know it when I see it. Or at the least what it means for goodness sake. The secret in the labyrinth of my hand held window to the world not far from my hands or eyes. I am not even certain who is pushing the buttons anymore. I MUST look at this menace in my hand. My eyes cannot see what my heart does. Then why do I bother. I cannot stop it. But I think I can control it. Don’t I. See with my eyes. Which by the way, hurt too. I thought reading was a left to right activity. Not up and down. I am indeed getting dizzy. And unbalanced. Narrowing my eyes to read the latest greatest piece of information. Hurts too. Why is my heart racing. I haven’t any effort to do anything else. I keep on searching for the meaning from the menacing messenger held in my hand.

Maybe I should just start playing a different game. Charades. Concentration. Hide and Seek. Running bases, Dodge ball. Heads up Seven up. I am so confused. Life is too complicated.

Where did I leave my lunch?

I forgot.