The End or the Beginning

The TV was playing a movie they had watched a thousand times before, but unlike all those times before, I wasn’t really watching it or singing along. My eyes were focused on my closest friends, just trying to soak them all in. Cleo was laughing at something Jared had said while she was casually leaning up against Jason in the loveseat. I couldn’t tell if Jason was even paying attention to their conversation as his eyes were glued to Cleo.

The two of them had taken forever to finally get together. No matter how many times Atasha or I had tried to encourage the two of them to ask out the other, they never would. Even Jared noticed their little glances at each other and their occasional blushes before either Cleo or Jason had. Even after Cleo admitted to liking Jason, she wouldn’t believe that he liked her back. Jared had told me that Jason was the same way.

I couldn’t help the smile that it took forcing them in the same car alone for the 3 hour drive to Six Flags before they finally admitted their feelings to each other. Honestly, I wish I had been present for that whole conversation but their glowing faces when they got out of the car and Jason wrapped his arm around Cleo caused me to literally squeal. Luckily, Atasha joined in or it might’ve been slightly awkward but we had all been rooting for the couple for years. Jared didn’t squeal, but from his large smile he might’ve been inside his head.

My eyes found Atasha sprawled out on the couch with her head in my lap and feet in Jared’s. I would’ve believed she was actually asleep if it wasn’t for her smile. Atasha’s boyfriend had graduated last year and she would be off to join him at their college in a month or two shortly after graduation. Atasha had been by my side since elementary school when they had both started cheerleading together. They had practiced for hours together, went to our first competition together, and they had even been Co-captains this past year.

Sophomore year she had burst into my room and practically broke my ribs when she had jumped on me with a manic grin. I couldn’t get her settled to tell me why she was bouncing and squealing for almost an hour. Turns out the boy she had been crushing on, one of the defense football players, had asked her out after school. They’d gone out for ice cream right after practice and from what Atasha had said clicked right away.

It's kind of funny now, considering that boy had turned out to be a self-obsessed jerk and cheated on her when she decided she wanted to wait till after marriage. Us three girls had spent that whole weekend eating ice cream and watching cheesy Disney shows.  Atasha had declared, “Why can’t guys be like these princes? Always loyal and loving?” We’d turned on ‘Brave’ to that and proceeded to call Cleo’s cousin who owned some horses.

A few months later, Atasha had met her prince while leaving her horse’s stall. He was there working as a stable hand after school and had apparently been working up the courage to ask her out. Now they are off to become veterinarians, at least that was their current plan. I was happy for the two of them and looked forward to their wedding this summer, just before Atasha moved.

Finally, there was Jared. He was probably the quietest out of her group, which was honestly not that surprising. While Cleo, Atasha, and me were all cheerleaders and Jason was a football player, Jared was a computer master. He and Jason had been friends since they were both in diapers. Jared had gotten into a lot of sports with Jason, but had never clicked well with him. While he was still in football, he’d found his passion in programming and engineering.

Jared had actually made me a little robotic dolphin one year for my birthday. It had been completely waterproof and pretty realistic. We’d had a lot of fun with the dolphin and some of his other robots over the last year or so. I actually still had the dolphin in my room, just waiting for it’s next dive. He was going to one of the greatest robotics schools in the country, which wasn’t too far away from where I was heading.

I couldn’t help the small sigh that left me at the thought of this being our last week as high schoolers. A small squeeze on my hand brought my eyes down to Atasha. She was still smiling, but I could see my own uncertainty reflected in her eyes. Her wedding would be the last event we were all together for. After that we would all part ways for the future. The thought made my stomach knot slightly, but forced out a smile before turning my attention back to the movie.

Atasha never let go of my hand for the rest of the movie, but I think it was for her comfort as much as it was for my own. When the credits rolled, none of us moved. We just watched the credits roll, maybe we were afraid of turning it off. In two days we’d graduate and this current chapter would end. I glanced over at Cleo who was already watching me with tears in her eyes. “Everything is changing. I don’t want it to change,” her soft voice finally broke the silence.

“Yet at the same time, I’m excited for this new chapter,” Atasha responded back just as softly as she sat up. She was right, I was excited to leave and do something new but I was terrified about how it’d change their group.

I looked around the group before I said, “Let's all make sure we stay in contact, yeah?” They all nodded. It was a strange solemn moment, they were all sure they’d remain friends and yet they knew they'd grow apart slightly. Without seeing each other each day and having the same experiences it was inevitable.

Change was inevitable and this was the first time it was striking me. For so long my home had been this house where countless sleepovers and movie nights had happened, where dinner at the table was common as my parents asked about our day. For so long school had been with the friends I had known for years, the classes might’ve changed but it was still the same. For so long things had been cheerleading, school and horses. For so long the dreams of a career and college had always been in the future, but now it was here.

It was always going to come, this end. It was an inevitable change and yet part of me had believed it never would. I wasn’t the only one who was scared. Everything was changing. And there was nothing we could do to stop it. We would just have to hold onto each other as it did.