SEASONAL SHADES

                       SEASONAL SHADES.

          A hazy mist of colour the day I met you. The joys of Autumn sunshine the hay being harvested and the fruitfulness of the season. Has we walked arm in arm through the dense woodland towards the park. A popular place for lovers to meet and caress. There is still an abundance of green the trees and shrubs shimmer in the sun. I watch as a playful grey squirrel chases after an acorn. The grass still glistens with early morning dew. I know the reason why you have come is to end our affair. Eva knows about us. The stillness of the air has you put your newspaper down upon the park bench, walking towards me.

   Your face is pale, your eyes red. I see that there is hurt there. You don’t have to say any words, has

 you retreat and walk away. Blue is how I feel, the time to wave goodbye. A red mist appears before

 my eyes. The sun hides behind cotton wool clouds. Walking away I have no intention of returning.

The memories will stay, an office romance that could not last? We did no wrong a smile, a brief kiss

 on the lips. She met and married you before I came on the scene. You’re smile, blond hair and

sparkling blue eyes. Six foot of pure manhood, it was not meant to be you and I.

 Walking from the park closing the brown wrought iron gate. I head towards the High Street. Traffic

passes by the lights change from red to amber. I will survive and, so will you? Sunshine and rain with

the occasional rainbow to light my way. The seasons will change and so will my heart? I’m only

nineteen years of age. It will get better time is a healer or so they say.

  Oh, October days to bring cheer, I think of the changing of the seasons with nature waving her magic wand. Crispy golden leaves under my feet. Hot chocolate by the fire with horse chestnuts roasting in the grate at the local pub. Trick and treat Halloween masks, Bonfire night an array of colours, waving of sparklers, Guy Fowkes a laugh with friends. I may shed a tear thinking of you? Life is full of lustre and pain so they say?

      My friends will jolly up my thoughts. Clinking of crystal glasses so clear and bright with prosecco. Catalogues hues and the latest Wintry fashions orange, lilac, pink and maxi length floral dresses strappy sandals to match the tinsel in mothers living room. Red berries Wintry showers of snow, high boots frosty walks with my dog Bouncer, a peel of Christmas bells to grace the season, the rustle of Christmas paper, candles, trees with shiny baubles in the local park our little tree decorated with love and care by mother and I. A scattering of Christmas cards on the rug, holly, mistletoe. The dawning of another year the office party held at the Grange Hotel will I see you?  

Crowds attending the office party, the crisp walk from the train station, icy patterns appear on the trees shrubs. Snow diamonds sparkle bright. Oh, so pretty there is a life away from you? The beauty of the season. I think of the shiny spiders web hanging from our garden shed oh, so delicate like a string of pearls. It will be there to welcome me home. Why do I think like this? There was no future for you and I. I must try to enjoy the season.  Friends rally around telling me that I was so lucky to escape your clutches you took advantage because I was vulnerable.

Christmas decorations alight the room everyone seems so kind buying me a drink, before moving on to meet others. A sandy haired little office girl, feeling the tears prick my eyes, why did I come here? Miss Colman finds me in the toilets , trying to jolly me up, telling me that I was not your first office romance. You see your wife holds the purse strings so they say? Your there chatting away with Suzy your wife? Did you ever really cate for me or was it all a lie? Soon the clock will strike midnight. Santa presents revellers leave the hotel. Taxes make there way carrying us home my friend Carrie and I. She chatters non stop in the taxi. Glad that we split the expense, risky getting the train back late. I sigh soon there will a new dawn and a peal of Christmas bells. Tinsel, turkey, snow fights ,children opening presents. Clear fresh air from my bedroom window. everything looks like sugar icing even the iced up cars getting stuck in the lane.

Merry Christmas I will survive? A smile comes to my lips, life does go on. I did surprize you knocking that drink down your shirt when you tried to ignore me? At the bar Christmas eve. Even the bartender looked surprised ? Is that all I meant to you? What did you tell dear sweet Suzy a drunken reveller could not hold her drink.

, A blackbird sings if he can survive those winter blues so must I. There is church and old Parsons sermon to contend with all part of Christmas spirit. Mother enjoys it a time to natter with her friends later to share sherry and mince pies in the vestry. Well it is all part of tradition. You see mother thinks I am a good catholic lass, If she guessed about you Derek she never said, eyes glisten in the candle light, I am sure that old Parsons thinks that he as touched a nerve with his sermon. Why spoil the magic? Everyone so chatty full of good will . We part company heading back amid the crisp white snow. Soon a new year maybe a change of job beckons, where will I be this time next year, who knows. For now breathing in the fresh crisp morning air welcoming mornings like this to free my thoughts. Soon there will be snow ploughs at the ready.