My Two Words

Nobody mess with my dinosaurs. I have them set up just the way I want them. Yes, I see you sitting close to where I’m playing, I’m using the mantle and the top of the bookshelf to set my dinosaurs up the way I want them. Don’t touch them. I don’t want you to reach for them, smiling, you want them and they’re mine. You say something. Your two words are “Let’s play” but I don’t want you to take my toys.

“NO, STOP!”

You understand my words, smile, and leave the room. Ahh, now I can get back to what I was doing. I’ll let you know if I need anything. This is the way the dinosaurs go.

               I’m hungry and I already had an apple. My water is good but I want a lot of something. I go and look on top of the fridge, I don’t see cereal. I know there’s no pretzels because I finished those yesterday. We’re out of popcorn.

“ONE GREEN!”

               My mom says, “Shopping at Dollar Tree?” Yes of course that’s it. You let me get pretzels and cookies there and sometimes a toy or two. I like the signs that have words on them, but I want to go now for snacks. We will go and you will let me have a cup of something but not the whole bag. Sometimes we walk there and sometimes we take the car. I love One Green.

               I cannot climb inside but I want to climb. There’s a place where it’s okay to climb. I love to climb trees and usually don’t need help, though sometimes I get really high up and my mom says to climb down, but I can climb on the ladder and up the slide if I want to. I don’t want to sit down, and I hate the words “Sit down,“ anyway, no matter who says them. I need to climb.

“PLAY GROUND!”

               I need to show my mom that I really want to go. I can get my own shoes and sometimes put them on. My mom knows some good playgrounds around here and I can go wherever I want when we’re there and I can climb on just about anything. My brother and sister always say, “He’s autistic,” whenever there’s other kids there that are looking at me, but I don’t say anything to them. Sometimes they talk to me, but I don’t talk back. I just want to go on the slide by myself.

               It’s raining outside. I love the rain. Days when it rains we should stay outside all day because raining is special. It only rains for a little bit, but even after it’s stopped, there’s puddles to jump in and I have these awesome shoes that I can pull on myself and they keep my feet dry. I think they’re just for puddles. I got the umbrella but my mom takes it because it’s only for outside. I love the umbrella.

“OPEN IT!”

These are the best words I say. This means getting my birthday present out of the wrapping paper. This means letting me eat my yogurt or applesauce or Otte pop. But most importantly, this means opening the door. My mom must go outside with me every time, and I need her to open the door.

My mom won’t open the door right now. I don’t know why, it’s raining and I want to go outside.

We’re going on a fast drive and there’s no traffic lights. We’re on the road that’s up high. There, in the distance there’s these beautiful, tall things. There’s white on the top, I think it’s snow. They’re far away and I want to drive to them, whatever they’re called. We’re in the car already, let’s go Mom!

“LOOK THERE!”

My mom can’t see me in the back seat. She asks me what it is, sometimes I say a color or a shape to let her know what I am talking about, but I don’t know what to say now, they’re not really a color or a shape.

“LOOK THERE!”

This time she turns around to see where I’m looking. “Oh!” she says, “The mountains!” That’s what they’re called, they look so awesome. I repeat her word, “mountains” a few times to try and remember it, but,” Look there,” works fine for now. I love the mountains. I want to climb them. They’re close to our home and I need to climb them and they will be climbed. I will climb to the top of these “mountains” and my mom will look up at me and smile. She’ll be so proud of me and probably say “WOW!” and “Good job!” and she will be happy and I will be happy and everything will be amazing.

“LET’S GO!”

               I’ve got it. She knows I see the mountains, she knows I love to climb. We’re in the car, I want to go. She says no, not right now and I cry a bit, because I’m sad. I can’t get to the mountains myself, I need my mom to take me there. My mom will climb with me and watch me climb higher than anyone else.

               I am quiet for the rest of the drive. I will see these mountains again, they’re so close. I will say it all again and again.

“LOOK THERE”

“LET’S GO!”

               I have to wait to climb a mountain, but I will climb one soon. I love my words, I love looking my mom in the eye now, and she looks back at me so we understand each other. I’m climbing even taller trees now, there’s no tree that’s too tall. This is what I’ll do while waiting for my chance to climb the mountain. I will keep climbing all the trees and playgrounds that I can. I will dream and draw and think about the mountains. I will point them out whenever I see them, and one day soon I will stand tall at the top.