Where's the Key?

Choices, always choices. White socks, black socks, blue tie, yellow, this show, that movie, all choices we make every day, but have little to no consequences, other than the ones we anoint them with. I feel like I’ve spent an inordinate amount of my life deciding about one thing or the other, and what has it gained me? I’m sure I’ve benefited from my choices as much as they have added to my disappointment, so it is the fact that we have the ability to make a choice, that is important.

Imagine having to stand before a door, two doors, two curtains, and are asked to visualize the thing you value the most behind one of them, and the thing, or person you dislike the most behind the other. Close your eyes and picture what I have suggested you do. Now you are required to back up your decision with an argument that quantifies the importance of, or lack of respect for, the objects you have envisioned.

He was always asking questions like that. Asking questions that made no sense until later. Later, that was the trick. I don’t know if he was prophetic, or simply lucky, but he had a way of knowing what was about to happen before it happened.

I asked him about it one time. All he would say was that if you paid attention, things, I assumed he meant the truth, “Would be revealed.” 

I tried doing what he said, but things never seemed to come to me, like they did to him. Take the door question, for instance. Pick something you admired the most, and something you disliked, even hated, I assumed he meant. I could think of all kinds of things I liked, or hated, but narrowing it down to one thing. I wasn’t sure that was even possible. There are just too many choices. But I guess that is what he was getting at.

When you have to think of the one thing that is most important to you, things change in a hurry. Not that I have so many things I could choose, that it would be impossible. It is just that I never thought of it before. One thing that is important, more important than everything else, in your life?

Hate, now that is the easy part. I could pick any one of a hundred things that bother me, but it doesn’t matter. Things you dislike or even hate come and go. Something new every day it seems, when you start thinking about it. I had never realized how many things I was bothered by. 

But love, that is something else. It doesn’t change every day, unless it’s just an infatuation, or a desire, but then, that is not love. 

But something that is the “most important?” The usual things come to mind, family, friends, freedom, security. All the things we take for granted. But to choose, just one thing. 

Then I remembered he said, “don’t get all worked up over something that you don’t know everything about or can’t understand.

It is impossible to know what is most important. It changes, as you change. Importance is relative to who and what you are, at or in, a particular time. To decide does not mean it can’t or won’t change. Chances are, it will change as you change. That is what life if about, change. 

Deciding what is important at the time, is what keeps us going. If we didn’t consider it important, we wouldn’t think about it.

Of all the animals we are the laziest, and the most irrational. We spend our lives chasing dreams that may or may not exist. We have our minds to curse, or praise for that. We have managed to develop to a point, where life is more than just survival. We have free time. Time to do things other than the necessities of maintaining an existence. So tell me, what is behind your door?”

I had never thought of having time to donate to causes other than existing, or possibly having time to rest, forget about life, and dream. I had been just putting in my time, marching in place.

And then he said the most insightful thing, “Dreams are always up hill, a struggle. When dreams reach the tipping point, and start down hill, we should find ourselves, dead.” 

I know there have been periods in history devoted to science, math, art, the age of enlightenment. That doesn’t seem to be as intrinsic today. We can’t even agree on a way to achieve peace, or prevent hunger or disease. Everything has been molded to fit personal agendas that have excluded the notion of social good, justice, freedom, all certainly uphill endeavors.  

He got me thinking about democracy. We can’t even agree on what that means anymore, or whether it is worth protecting. At this very moment I believe I would have to place democracy behind my door of choice. Behind the other door I would place selfishness, disregard for respect.

Democracy, because it allows us to express our opinions within a collective nature, or independently, selfishly. But it does not condone forcing our will on the idealism of others. Labeling one view right, all others wrong.

Selfishness to me is the inability to believe in your own set of ethics, values, morality, without imposing them on others, demanding agreement . Arrogant behavior is exclusionary. Societal behavior is inclusionary. Humbleness implies reason. 

What seems to be lost in translation, is that the pendulum swings in both directions, and finding yourself on the other side of the arc will undoubtedly get your attention.  What you have forced upon others, may now be leveled at you. The ability to take the ball and go home when you lose, is no longer an option. You are forced to accept the majorities wishes in a democracy as well as proselytize your own. 

Democracy should be about the game, because that is what it is. Individuals participating in a collective endeavor to make life more inclusive for everyone, by making sure the laws that direct our society remain honest, and are applied justly. A tug of war between ideologies', not a fight to the death.

Democracy implies a battle for the understanding of others who feel as you do, and those that do not. It also insures that those outnumbered by differing views are not subject to punishment because of a differing view, as the difference fought so hard to obtain, is the game. When we neglect the rules and abandon the contest, we all lose, because we have failed to communicate our reasons for our beliefs, and all that remains is raw power, a power that corrupts absolutely.