The Locked Door

I’m finally seen!! I was born and raised in the busy New York City. Never had to many friends, was never popular…even in high school. You know, the one no one wanted to pick to be on their team for anything. Yep, that was me.

I remember I had a bad crush on Michael Nelson….boy was he fine. Talk, dark and muscles that were visible through his clothes, OH MY. On top of him being the eye candy of my High school, he was very smart, friendly and popular. One thing though……Michael never saw me, just as no one else saw me.

Besides the 3 friends I had, by the way, they weren’t popular as well, I was pretty much invisible. I was never invited to go to the school events that most high school students enjoyed or hang out on Friday nights. It was always me and my same 3 girlfriends. I always felt hidden in blind sight.

I was anxious for graduation, thinking I would soon be popular or at least have more then 3 friends. I ventured into visiting different places, trying to broaden my experiences…thinking I would meet new people and have more friends than I could ever imagine…..BUT NOPE!

Still pretty much under the unpopular radar, I graduated high school. I held my head up high and walked across the stage with the biggest smile I think I ever had.

I remember how I felt when I walked across the stage and no one cheered for me except my small family. It was almost like that thick tension when the “elephant” walks in the room. I couldn’t wait for this, would be happy occasion to be O-V-E-R.

Afterwards, everyone was excited about the parties and celebrations they were going to have or either going to attend. I felt so empty, because I had no parties or celebration to attend.

My best friend, Stephanie, her parents through her a graduation party and to my surprise; they added my name to her cake! I was sooo grateful and happy, that it brought a few tears.

Within the next week, we started to plan the rest of our lives! Are we going into the Military, college or get a job…back then, everyone was going into the Federal Gov LoL.

I decided I’d go to college and become a Psychiatrist. It was awesome! I was so excited! I’m getting my life together….starting a new journey.

Along with passing my classes, my main objective was to feel popular, to be seen and just have people know who Denise Fredericks is. I wanted to finally not feel like I was locked up in an invisible bubble.

College was going great, as far as academics was concerned BUT as far as popularity…NOPE! I’m once again, not noticed, unpopular and still feeling invisible.

I decided to do something different. So I changed my way of dress and my mindset.

Shortly after that, I gained 2 new friends…Gina and April. We had a lot in common and even had a class together.

Gina studied journalism, she was an excellent speaker and coach. April was studied sports medicine and a part time sports coach. Needless, to say, these 2 ladies helped change my life.

Gina and April had been attending the college for 2 years and had developed a nice realm of friends, whom they introduced me to.

Things were starting to change for the better. As Gina and April introduced me to students on campus, I no longer felt so isolated. I also noticed, when I changed my mindset, I stopped thinking so hard about having friends and being popular. It seemed as though, it wasn’t as important.

One Friday evening, Gina, April and I went to a book reading, something I had never done before. It was amazing!

The writer had an absolutely perfect way of making his readers feel like they were inside of his mind.

For the first time in my life, I tried mingling. Yes…me….mingling. I’ve always felt as though no one saw me and not to many people wanted to get to know me, so I stayed out of the way.

Usually, when I tried to have even the smallest conversation, it almost always turned into silence….nothing but crickets.

To much of my own surprise, I introduced myself to the author of one of the best selling books, not only did we discuss his amazing ability to tell a story. We also discussed my thoughts of a story, I would love for him to write.

Tonight was different. I successfully got through the evening without wanting to leave or without feeling irrelevant.

Besides, I thought, my hair is fierce, I had on my favorite Dolce & Gabbana perfume and the way I looked in my sexy ensemble was top line classy. There’s no way I was going to let this evening end without being seen.

As the evening progressed, I was approached by several people from different backgrounds who had an interest in conversing with me! This night was amazing!!

I finally felt like I belong. The feeling of being locked up and unseen had gone away for the evening.

Little did I know, this book reading was the start of my life!

The very next evening I was contacted by, Michael the...... WRITER from the book reading.

Michael was very much interested in my story telling ideas. I shared plots, scenes, backgrounds and characters. He loved my ideas and wanted to get started right away with a new book.

Although, I was 28 years old. I had never felt more involved with life as I felt at that moment. I went from being the girl no one paid attention to, to this dynamic young lady whose presence was requested by a top writer.

Many doors of opportunity started to open up for me. My career, that I never dreamed of, was taking off. Even though I was studying to be a doctor, my once very small thought of getting one of my story’s published, even if I’m not the writer, was a dream come true.

My life was becoming a dream and I was no longer feeling invisible.

I graduated from college at the top of my class. I’m working towards getting my own practice. I’m on my second story with Michael, the first book sold 1 million copies!

I’m no longer living behind the scenes or being unnoticed! My locked door to society has been unlocked with opportunities and happiness.

By now you could guess that the writer was Michael Nelson, my crush in high school…..Yummmy.