Here Comes The Judge

Here Comes The Judge

The judge banged his gavel repeatedly. “Order! Order in the court, I say!”

The unruly din continued for another minute or two until the command took root. A woman shrieked loudly and ran across the courtroom. Giggles were heard in the gallery as peanuts get passed around. Playful hand clapping rhythms drummed out. Someone sang 'Baa, Baa, black sheep. Have you any wool?' The prosecutor adjusted his ill fitting suit and emitted a low growl.

The gavel pounded again. A kind of hush fell all over the room.

The owly judge pronounced, “All right, Mrs. Farmer, the mice have been chased out of the area. You can turn over the carving knife to the bailiff.”

“What do you want me to do with their tails?”

“Give them to the officer, also. Thank you for saving us all from those blind justice seekers. Now back to the case at hand.

“Mr. Prosecutor, Mr. Wolfe, correct? You were in the middle of questioning the witness, I believe. Proceed, please. And we will have no more outbursts such as that again, understand? Or I will be forced to clear the court.”

The prosecutor cleared his throat, “Gr-r, gr-um. Um, you were saying, Miss Marm.”

“My name is not 'Marm'. That is what I am. A school marm.”

“Sorry. A school marm named Miss Mary?”

“No. Mary is a student. My name is unrecorded.”

“Okay, Miss Unrecorded. You are on record saying the perpetrator, the accused, broke the rules. Is that correct?”

“Yes. That is correct.”

“Can you identify this rule breaker? Are they present in the courtroom today?”

“Well, it is hard to say exactly because there are so many gathered here that resemble the culprit, but I believe that is the one at that table there.”

“Let the record show Miss Unrecorded is pointing at the defendant at the defendant's table. How sure are you that is the one, Miss Unrecorded?”

“Nearly 100 percent, Sir. Like I said there are many in attendance that look very much the same, though. It's fleece is white as snow sort of like your suit and like over in the jury box.”

“Those are peers deciding if the party is guilty of the charge. Is there any other way we could use to definitely identify the rule breaker?”

“Oh, I don't know for sure but I suppose if it follows the student Mary every where she goes it might be a clue.” Assured the young marm.

“And why is that, I wonder?” Wondered Mr Wolfe, as he readjusted his slipping suit.

“That's how it arrived at school. It followed Mary. It's rumored it follows her where ever she goes.”

“Your Honor, I request the student Mary seated next to the defendant walk across the room to see if she will be followed by the perpetrator.” Mr. Wolfe suggested.

“If you please, Young Lady, rise and walk across the room.” The judge directs.

When she did, the little lamb next to her did indeed follow her across the room and back to the table.

“I believe that proves the defendant is the animal in question. And exactly what rules were broken by this devious character, Miss Unrecorded?”

“Your Honor, I must object.” The defense attorney spoke softly. “Counselor is leading the witness by defaming the character of the accused.”

“Sustained. Disregard the description offered by the prosecutor. You may answer the question.” The judge instructs.

“What was the question again?”

“What rules were broken?”

“Well, it is against the rules to have a lamb, or any animal for that matter, at school.”

“Your Honor, I object!” Mr. Shepherd, counselor for the defense speaks up once more.

“State your objection, Counselor.” The judge grants permission.

“As we have recently witnessed, animals such as those mice that got loose are allowed at school.”

“How do you justify that, Miss Unrecorded?” Asks the bench.

“Those are used for educational purposes. Mostly scientific research.”

“Objection overruled. You may proceed, Mr. Wolfe.”

“And why is there such a rule regarding non-scientific animals in school?”

“It can be very disruptive to a classroom. The students can't learn.”

“Why is that?”

“It makes the children laugh and play. Laughing and playing, you understand, doesn't allow room for learning.”

More giggles erupted from the gallery above.

“Order.” Demanded the judge once more banging his gavel.

“And, therefore, Miss School Marm. What did you do to take care of the problem?”

“Let's see. Oh, yes, I turned it out, yes, Sir, I turned it out. But still it lingered near.”

“Then what happened, in your own words.”

“It waited patiently, patiently until Mary did appear.”

“Was that the end of the fiasco?”

“So far. Mary must have contained it so it wouldn't follow her to school again.”

“To sum up. We have a wayward lamb identified as the defendant that broke the rules by interrupting your classroom time stealing valuable learning time from all of your students. Is that a fair assessment?”

“Yes, I believe you are correct.”

“Your Honor, I rest my case. I recommend further incarceration for the defendant so such a travesty never happens in Nursery Rhyme Village again. Just so you know, I gladly offer my services to take the perpetrator into custody and render justice.

“I'm sure that won't be necessary, Mr. Wolfe.” The judge avows. “You may step down, Miss Unrecorded. Now it is the defense's turn to state their case. Mr. Shepherd, the floor is yours.”

The kindly looking attorney in white robe and sandals stands and lifts the defendant into his arms and carries it before the bench.

“Your Honor, this is one of My lost sheep. It did stray. It was lost but now it is found. It loved Mary as she loved it. That is why it follows her everywhere much like Mary follows Me. I have paid the price of its transgressions. It is forgiven. Therefore, you should forgive it, also. When a lost sheep is found and repents of straying I provide for all its needs and return it to the sheepfold. It has provided a valuable lesson to all the children at school and in the peanut gallery today.”

“How does the jury find the defendant?” Asks the judge.

“Not guilty!” They shout in unison and spill out to surround the Good Mr. Shepherd.

“Case dismissed!” Declares the judge.