Scarlett's Dream

Scarlett had some nights were sleep did not come easily to her. Sometimes sleep came easily to her was when she thought about her goals that she wanted to achieve; she always achieved them in her late-night fantasies. As they say good sleep requires peace which she did not have. She always dreamt about having a small beautiful family in a perfect little house in the suburban city. A family that she will love and care about. Some nights her traumatizing past will haunt her in her slumber. But this time her dream was a beautiful past that troubled her heart. It caused her the most aching pain in her soul, which she loved at times. When she thought about Robin her heart ached, but it made her felt good. Robin left Scarlett 2 years ago, but her memories still lingered in Scarlett’s dreams. Robin was her first love.

Scarlett never forgot Robins mesmerizing brown eyes, her auburn long beautiful tresses and mostly her smile. When she use to see Robin her heart always beat fast, she always felt nervous when she was around her.  Scarlett did not only love her by outer beauty, but her personality struck her the most. Robin was the type of person that loved and cared fully with her heart. Once she loves that person, she cares about them deeply. Robin was the type of person who always craved love and attention, and once she sees a person with those qualities it instantly draws her to that person. One thing Scarlett loved about her was she never left anybody, see would always stick through the good, bad and the ugly. Although see would argue back and show her madness but deep down she would show her support in her beautifully dramatic way. It always made Scarlett difficult to ever fully be mad with her because she would always find a way to win her back. It was not only her beauty that made Scarlett love her so much it was intriguing love and care that made her stay with Robin so long; and difficult to leave her.  But seeing Robin made Scarlett peaceful and happy. In their silences, arguments and jokes made Scarlett feel better about her life.

Scarlett woke up startled and her heart was beating fast when she had the dream about Robin. It was an old memory of one of their biggest arguments they had, and Scarlett wanted to resolve their issues because she missed her and wanted to work things out. She woke up breathless her thoughts said “Why can’t her memories leave me alone. She has moved on and is living happily. Get over her, Scarlett.” Her friends constantly told her to get over Robin that she will find somebody for herself one day. Robin claimed that she loved Scarlett but always said it was wrong and it was better if she found a man and they remained as friends. Robin always wanted Scarlett by her side no matter who came in her life.

Scarlett was okay with the exclusiveness but always wanted more. Scarlett was a fool for thinking that Robin loved and cared for her. Although, she did but when it was convenient for her. Robin was only excited that a woman fell in love with her. When Scarlett would be more serious about their relationship Robin pushed her away. Scarlett often thought about the rights and wrongs between Robin and her, she could not believe the dream she had.

                                             ***

Scarlett wanted to show her friend Denise that she appreciated her and wanted to wish her good luck on her final. Both Denise and Robin were going to take the same final. When she was walking towards campus, she noticed a person selling flowers. She knew how much Denise loved flowers; it always made her feel better. She thought Robin is taking the same final maybe she would get one for her too, she was hesitant. Scarlett only got flowers for Denise she did not want to seem desperate. She liked Robin a lot, but Robin did not feel the same way about her. She went inside campus to find Denise; she came across Robin. She saw Scarlett with the flowers and had the hugest smile on her face. Scarlett wanted to move away from her, but Robin smile left her awestruck.

“Hey Robin, how are you?”

“Hi, I’m good” There was a moment of silence between them

“By the way just wanted to say good luck on your final. I know you will do great.” Robin was not standing alone she was with a group of friends.

“Thank you, are these flowers for me?” Robin was smiling so much, and her friends thought the flowers were for her as well. Scarlett felt bad.

“Umm, no they are actually for Denise, I know how much she love flowers. I wanted to show her how much I appreciated her and wanted to wish her good luck. Have you seen Denise?” Robins smile slowly faded away and looked down.

“Oh, I thought they were for me. I haven’t seen Denise.” Scarlett saw Denise and walked towards her, she turned around and wished good luck to Robin again. As Scarlett walked towards Denise Robin and her friends looked at them. Scarlett gave her the flowers; Denise gave her a tight hug. Robin looked at Scarlett with an intense glare filled with madness and sadness.

Scarlett felt bad because she loved seeing her beautiful smile and it went away, she thought to herself “Ahh I should have got those flowers for her. So, what if you looked desperate at least you would have been the reason behind Robins smile.” As Scarlett walked up the stairs, she took a few glances of Robin one of her friends said, “Wow you got her flowers and me nothing.” When Scarlett heard that she realized how much she hurt Robin. Scarlett wanted to patch things up with her. She decided that she did not want to be mad at her anymore. So, what she did not like her at least they could be friends. She thought about Robins favorite things that she can find on campus. She told Denise the whole situation about everything.

Scarlett later found Robin she shouted her name “how was your final?” She was with her friend

“It was good.”

“Are you free around 3? I have something for you, and I want to talk to you about something.” Robin looked towards her friend “Yeah, I’m free.”

“Cool meet me here.” Scarlett knew how much Robin loved salt & vinegar chips and loved coffee. She did not want to get out of campus because she was working. Although work was slow that day, she did not want to leave work. During her break she went out of her way to find her favorite chips, but she could not find them anywhere. Scarlett was upset. Although, she could not find her favorite chips. She knew that she will be able get Robin her coffee.

It was 3 o clock Scarlett was nervous, she quickly ran to get Robin her coffee, she came across Robin and her friend. “Give me 2 minutes. I’m gonna get you coffee, you like it dark with 2 creams and no sugar, right?”

As Scarlett was walking fast Robin grabbed her by the hand. Their eyes locked at each other and Scarlet pressure starting rising, she was blushing “Yeah, it’s okay Scarlett. I don’t need it.” Scarlett looked at her friend and asked her if she wanted coffee. When Scarlett came back with the coffee her friend was still there. Scarlett told her that she wanted to speak to her alone; her friend left. Scarlett was nervous to speak to her.

“How was your final?”

“It was good I was nervous about it. I don’t know if I did great.”

“You’re a smart girl, I’m sure you did fine.” There was silence between them.

“How do you like your coffee?”

“It’s good.”

“Robin, I feel bad for not bringing you flowers. I know things got awkward when I told you about my feelings towards you. I wanted to get you flowers, but I did not want to seem desperate. I saw that beautiful smile of yours and it made me think Damn I should have got you it. I was upset when I saw it went away. That’s why I remembered how much you love salt & vinegar chips and how you like to take your coffee.” Robin smiled.

“It’s okay Scarlett. I can’t believe you remembered my favorite chips and how I like my coffee” Robin sneezed, she got up and got her a napkin. She was so nervous when she was talking to Robin that she decided to stand up. She noticed that and told Scarlett to sit down next to her.

“I’ve noticed that your friends are saying things and I know one of them yelled at me when I confessed my feelings towards you, so I thought you didn’t want to talk to me. You would also kind of following me around I was annoyed about it.” Before their argument Robin went on a religious trip, she told Scarlett about it.

“No, Scarlett I’m not mad at you, we can still be friends and honestly you don’t even listen sometimes.”

“Yeah, we can still be friends. I miss us, I miss the times we spent together before our argument.”

Robin smiled “Me too.”

“So how was your trip?”

“I thought about you a lot. I even prayed for you.”

“Yeah what did you pray?”

“The prayer was that you and I should always stay together and support each other no matter what.” Scarlett’s heart was throbbing so much, she could not believe someone could pray for her at a holy place.

“What do you mean always stay together?”

Robin glared at Scarlett “Just us staying together, okay?”

Scarlett and Robin often use to walk together when they were done with their classes, but they stopped “I miss our walks they always made me felt better.” Robin hit Scarlett on her chest

“But you didn’t want to and when we did you barely spoke to me,” Scarlett loved when Robin did that.

“Hey, don’ do that” and they both laughed. “Want to walk together just like old times?”

 “I would love that.”

                                ***

Even though Robin moved on from Scarlett they still talked from time to time. Scarlett missed talking to her but often thought it was not worth it. Robin told Scarlett that she was not feeling great about herself. She always hated when Robin had her lows and always did her best to make her feel better. Scarlett was annoyed that Robin was still having issues in her love life, she really wanted to move on and is trying to hold on to their friendship. But, she could not anymore because her feelings always got in the way and once, she embraced those feelings it was hard for her to only see Robin as a friend. But since she had some care left for her, she still listened to her complaints.  She told Scarlett how she was not happy in her married life and she loved her husband a lot and thought things would get better. They both had their great moments, but it did not last too long. Robin felt that his love and attention was slowly fading away. Her insecurities made her thought that he was not giving her much love and attention. She tried fighting it off, but it did not work, their arguments grew daily, and it constantly made Robin upset.  She vented to Scarlett that she was finding common grounds in her marriage, but it was never enough for her husband, and she always ended up being the villain. After hearing her out Scarlett was upset, she hated that the person that she cared about the most was in so much pain and was trying to fight it off. By hearing all this made her realize that no matter what she will have some care for her. But, she also wanted Robin to see the toxicity of her relationship and she was to blind to see it.

Robin asked Scarlett to meet up since she was going to be around her area, she wanted to say no because she was trying to get over her. But, after hearing all of her complaints, her heart was soft. This would be the last time she can see her before moving on. Scarlett craved closure and this was the perfect moment to get closure from Robin. She wanted to get something for her, but it was short notice. Then she realized why she had that dream.

She instantly got salt & vinegar chips, which was her favorite. She could not wait to her meet, she missed her so much. But she knew she could not be friends with her anymore. Robin was in pain and Scarlett could not bear Robins pain. She wanted to find somebody for herself and did not want to stick around with Robin when she felt upset. She missed her beaming smile, her glowing brown eyes. She missed when Robin would tell her to Shut up when she told her dumb jokes. It was time for her to move on from Robin since Scarlett would never be enough for her. Scarlett’s dreams often had a hidden message, with time she understood the hidden message. The dream that she had was a hidden message that Robin will meet her. Closure was waiting for Scarlett scared heart.