I Just Kissed My Best Friend

Dear Diary,

I just kissed my best friend.

Ever since the day that Lucy Harrison stepped into my life, I knew that we were meant to be best friends. She’s always been so confident and funny and charming. It’s honestly surprising that she too, would wanna be my best friend seeing as I am the exact opposite of all of that. But like I said, right from the start, we’ve had this sort of connection. Whenever I’m around her, it’s like electricity coursing through my veins. And now I think I’ve ruined it.

Now, I had never been to a crazy high school party. Parties really aren’t my thing, not to sound pretentious. Lucy on the other hand, has been to many teen movie-worthy high school parties. 

Clearly, the fact that I hadn’t been to any crazy parties bothered Lucy because as soon as she heard about this party, she practically begged me to go.

And clearly, I cannot say no to Lucy because I ended up at that stupid party.

It’s just, whenever she wants me to do something, she makes that annoyingly adorable puppy dog face.

“Sophiaaaa,” she’ll say, and then I can’t say no.

Lucy was coming to pick me up at 8:30 and so I waited outside for her. Judging by the look on her face, leggings and a hoodie were not party appropriate.

“We’re going to my house first,” she said, glancing at me as she backed out of my driveway. There was a mischievous glimmer in her eyes.

I begged her to not make me change, but she insisted. She wanted me to at least change out of my hoodie. She gave me a flowery sort of crop top. It was totally not my thing, but I tried it on for Lucy. She told me I looked cute, and that made my insides feel fluttery. Suddenly, I liked the top.

Finally, after all of the fussing about making me look high school party ready, we were on our way. Okay, I’ll admit it, I was kind of excited. It was kind of a big deal to be going to your first party.

Lucy looked over at me.

“Nervous?”

That’s all she said to me. Something about the way she said that made me at least 10 times more nervous. And I don’t think it even had to do with the party. 

I’m pretty sure she got her answer by the look on my face because she said “Soph, chill. You don’t have anything to worry about. It’s just fun, and I’ll be there the whole time.”

“Okay,” I said, even though I was certain she’d find some boy to wander off with to make out. She really has a thing for stupid, skinny, nerdy boys. Like, the kind that play golf. It annoys me. And if it isn’t the skinny, nerdy boys, it’s a volleyball boy. Now THOSE annoy me. Is it too much to ask that your best friend who dragged you to a stupid party at least stay with you?

Anyway, we pulled up to the house. Judging by the amount of cars outside, it was PACKED. I could already hear the music blasting.

As soon as we walked through the door, some dude shouted “hey Luce!” and she headed over to the drink table to meet him. I trailed behind her like a child, or some kind of pet.

Soon enough, Lucy was downing drinks and giggling to a gaggle of stupid sports boys. I wasn’t much of a drinker, but I figured I’d need a little something to help me get through this night. But the drink wasn’t enough, and I was getting bored of watching golf boys all over my best friend, so I decided to explore. The house was pretty big and littered with drunk people, but I found an empty bedroom. I figured I could hang in here until Lucy was ready to leave. I felt wrong being in someone else’s room. The bed in the middle of the room was so nicely made, that I didn’t even want to sit on it. So I laid on the floor next to it, hidden.

I guess I accidentally fell asleep because I awoke to the sounds of bumping and kissing. I opened my eyes and sat up to see my best friend attached to the face of some jerk in a letterman jacket. Who even gets a letterman for golf? I didn’t care. It was stupid that she was kissing this boy and now I was in an awkward position. I didn’t want them to notice me sneaking out and I was too lazy to get up anyway. I closed my eyes and decided I’d just go back to sleep. As I started to slip away, I heard the kissing stop and the sound of Lucy’s voice. “Get off of me! Stop!”

That got me up. I saw that stupid boy still kissing at her neck as she tried to push him off.

“Get off of her you jerk! Leave!” I shouted.

I guess that scared him because he got off of her. He just stood there, shocked.

“I said LEAVE!” I screamed, starting to move towards him. He scrambled out the door.

I heard a sniffly sort of laugh. I turned to Lucy.

“Are you okay?” I asked, sitting down next to her on the bed.

“Yeah, he just started to undress me, and I really wasn’t ready for that. But I’m fine,” she smiled, “my best friend saved me. Thank you.”

“Of course. You’re my best friend. It’s my job to chase off creeps.”

Lucy laughed as she fumbled with the buttons on her shirt. She was wearing a tight, white cropped cardigan thing as a shirt. I guess the guy had unbuttoned it, because now she was rebuttoning it. And struggling.

“Here, let me do it.” I said. I buttoned her shirt for what seemed like an eternity. My cheeks were burning and I was almost positive I looked like a tomato.

“Thank you” Lucy said once I finished. She was smiling sweetly with a mischievous look in her eyes.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing,” she said with a giggle.

“Okay...”

“It’s just, I love youuu. You’re my best friend and I love youuu. Please lay down with me, Soph. I’m sleepy.”

I couldn’t say no to that. I was tired too and Lucy was being cute.

I just laid there, looking at her sparkly hazel eyes and shiny dark hair. I felt like I was dreaming. I reached up and started to stroke her hair. I couldn’t help myself.

“Kiss me,” she whispered.

I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and then leaned in to kiss her. Her lips were warm. She tasted like alcohol and something fruity. This had to be a dream. 

I had my hands in her hair and her hands were on my waist. She kissed me passionately.

Then, the dream ended. I guess she must’ve realized what she was doing because she pushed me off of her. She said an abrupt apology and ran out. I wanted to chase after her and figure out what happened, but quite honestly, I couldn’t move. I felt stuck. I just laid there, trying to fight tears. What just happened?

I ended up having to walk home. The whole time, a single sentence echoed through my mind, and still does, even hours later.

“I just kissed my best friend, and now she hates me.”