WHY SHOULD I WASH THAT FILTHY LAUNDRY?

   Bridget threw some delicious hip swings while angrily shooting off her mouth like an autumn peacock.

   “Why should I wash all that filthy laundry?”.

   “It is the shift Bridget, just obey,” Dainess paled her face like a malaria patient as she tried to calm her friend.

  The two were employed as maids at SAFE GUEST HOUSE in Kabwe’s mine area. The laundry being referred to consisted of beddings. An eccentric white woman had used them for months without any form of laundry.

  “Check, it is even infested with bugs…”Bridget twisted her nose in disgust as she smashed a horde of the horrible creatures with a pressing iron. The terrible smell swirling up forced instant regurgitation from Dainess.It engulfed the whole room and even followed Bridget to the washing rooms as she took the laundry.

   “Whrrrriiiiillll…” “Whrrrriiiiillll…” the machine spoke as it swallowed half the pile of blankets.In no time it started churning the soiled beddings round and round but automatically came to a stop like some robot after a programmed time. She was just removing the blankets from the machine when the door swung open with something akin to police violence.

Madam Michelo,the manager entered the washing room and immediately grimaced in disgust before howling angrily…   “Bridget, are those blankets soaked or washed?

they are washed madam

"Why are they still so dirt if they have been laundered?”

    “Oh! Sorry madam,” Bridget panicked. “I forgot to add a detergent to dissolve the dirt.” Jobs were difficult to find and she did not much relish losing this one. To get it she had to sleep with Paul, a guy from the human resource department. Paul had offered to squeeze her in just for a few months in place of another woman who was nursing a small baby.

    “You open your legs for me to enter,I will also open my purse to make you a queen,” he had said to seduce her. Facing the manager this moment, she did not feel like a queen at all.

   “Don’t madam me! I don’t pay you to tell me sorry madam, do I?”Michelo shouted vehemently with needless violence. She enjoyed intimidating the juniors more than anything else. “I will be back here in ten minutes; those blankets must be clean or else…”

    Michelo had another problem. Since Bridget arrived a week prio the place was abuzz with “a new diva with undulating hips like she walked on springs" wow.Knowing Mr. Solo, the Managing Director of SAFE group of companies, she had every reason to panic.

   Mr. Solo was a consummate womanizer whose twinkling dark eyes and bristling beards always sprang to life in the presence of any beautiful woman. He was yet to meet Bridget as Michelo made sure the two were as far apart as the two poles.

   “No problem madam…” with trembling fingers Bridget hastily added some detergent and recycled the blankets back into the washing machine. She was praying for the machine to do a faster job within the ten minutes duration hinted by the manager.

   Ten minutes sharp. The door screeched hurriedly and swung open. Bridget’s heart sank; she almost collapsed hearing the cursed door screech open-she almost died hearing it slamming shut. She kept her eyes glued to the machine and her heart was always praying for it to be a bit faster. .

"whrrrrllll….,”"whrrrrllll….,” "whrrrrllll….,” the machine continued it traitorous slow motion speed as if by design. What will I do …” Bridget panicked as she turned the cranking handle; “be fast you please! I beg in Jesus name,” she prayed desperately. She darted about nervously, not even turning to see the intruder .She was sure it was the manager, no reason why it should be someone else. "It must be the manager…who else can it be?” she was wailing internally.

     And horror of horrors struck like an avenging angel. As she fumbled touching things about, she pressed some obscure button, and the machine whined some ear piercing sound and came to a stop. The machine had broken down. Breaking down when the manager is nearby, of all times. Why are disasters so damn stupid?Why choose the most inconvenient moment to strike? The silence from the intruder added more agony; why was she quiet? Can’t she say something please, I will welcome even an insult, anything but not the silence...everything came to a stand still...

  She jumped when the clock alarm ticked; it was like the crack of the manager’s voice into her troubled ears.

The buzz of a cell phone was like the crack of a slap on her cheeks

The creaking roof was like the manager’s foot kicking her bottom

Her breaking nerves were singing loud ringing tones - she would go mad. With eyes howling all manner of pleading, she turned round, her trembling mouth trying to say something …to explain..

   “Madam, the machine…..” her eyes bulged in shock and her mouth dangled a lower jaw like a car tail gate.

   “Hi Bridget...” The voice ripped her nerves like a shambok on a bare skin. It was a voice that forced a span of one hundred and eighty degrees in feelings. She was looking into the beaming face of Paul, the human resource manager.

   “Oh! He...llo Pau...l...” Bridget answered. Her heart skipped a few beats as she fought to push through the correct emotional response. In fact the heartbeat had quickened tremendously especially after seeing the glint of lust in Paul’s eyes; lust and fear are opposite poles of the same magnet.

    “When is lunch for you Bridget?” he was stooping down into her ears, mistaking her earlier discomfort for a girlish prank. A hot breath ‘scorched’ her bare skin coming like the Sahara breeze, her nostrils vibrated invitingly as some delicious scent of male mouth wash poured in.

    “I don’t go for lunch..,” she breathed a sigh of strained relief. “We work through even when others are eating like we don’t have stomachs at all.”

   “You sound unhappy..,” the resource man was saying things while spreading the unwashed laundry to arrange some kind of a bed.

   “Happy in this place you…ha!” Bridget was trying to fall down properly with the weight of her man coming like a truck on her belly.

    “So should I transfer you to another manager?”He was saying as his knee poked for trouble between her legs. “I know Madam Michelo can be a terror sometimes….”he was talking with difficult because by now the blue fire was now racing in his veins.

   The word manager reminded Bridget of her predicament. The fear of the woman made her lose all desire for sex. She snuggled out from under the human resource manager….

   “The madam will be here any moment, you…”she said breathless.

   “Really?” Paul asked eyes wide in disbelief. “Why, even during lunch?”

  “Yes,” she said hastily. "The bitch doesn't do any timing."

"Sorry about that...."

“And Paul, I need help urgently,"she cut in quickly. "The machine has broken down...”

   Hardly had she finished speaking when there was the sound of feet pounding the corridors with a determined pace. The whining voice of a bad tempered woman shouting; “This laundry machine is silent, what is this bitch doing inside there?” identified who it was.

  “Oh sorry I got to go. I will see you later...”Paul shamelessly escaped from the tigress using the other door leading to the ablutions. He left her alone to face the horrible woman, a merciless She-Devil. He left her like someone leaving a pile of feaces that one doesn’t need any more.

   Bridget stood up quickly and smoothed her skirt, pursed her lips in awed anticipation of the worst... “I am alone, really Paul is useless,” were thoughts raking her entire self-preservation system.

   “Mama! What will I do now?”She was wailing silently as her little fingers tried to repair the machine.

The manager scrapping at the door was like the roar of a lion

The e door handle whine was like the clap of thunder

The screeching door was like a knife stab in her back..the crippling one..she was completely crippled now.

Bridget started wailing loudly like someone who had lost a mom.Tears of a scared woman ran freely on her elongated face messing up all the beauty. Her fingers shaking like guitar strings busily fumbled with the damaged washing machine as if she could rectify the problem.

  “What is the problem?” Bridget jumped like a harpooned shark when she heard the voice of her manager. Even the masochist Michelo this time dropped a tear in pity but she successfully hid it from her victim. “Who shows pity to a beautiful diva who may grab your man one day?”And not just any man but the Managing Director of SAFE, no never.

  ‘Madam I am sorry again…”

    “Forsake! You stupid bitch…now you will wash the remainder by hand...”Michelo failed to waive a chance to inflict pain. She expected Bridget to wash ten blankets at the speed of a washing machine.

   Bridget was glad that it was not a direct sack, “thank you madam, you are very kind,” she said gladly, her whole heart meaning every word.

   Bridget spent the whole afternoon washing the blankets. She finished at nineteen hours. It was dark and with a curfew in place she needed a strong reason if she was not going to sleep in a police cell.

  As she wrung the last duvet, she felt something hard. Checking the material properly she discovered a small zip. What is this hard thing? She wondered as she fought to open the zip.

   Her heart was racing, beating faster than an Olympic champion. Twice she missed the zipping but the third time "Wheehehhh..." the zip opened, the duvet had a pocket and in this pocket someone had placed a purse containing small stones.

Bridget entered the pocket and her trembling fingers clasped on some items which felt like stones in a purse. She removed the purse, a minx skin fur purse. Her eyes widened as she wondered internally,” This is an expensive purse.” 

She looked around, there was no one. All the workers had knocked off because their work did not involve punishment.

"What are these shining stones?" she wondered.Then she solved the riddle. "Aha! these are expensive jewels..they are diamonds,What a beautiful necklace.....?.The earrings are so angelic and the chains...so gorgeous..what should I do?"

“Now I know why I had to wash all that filthy laundry,” she whispered to herself.

However, the discovery created another problem. What to do with the discovery?

"Should I tell the madam?"...the cruel madam...probably a stupid one as well...maybe she will stop insulting me.

"Should I tell Paul..yes yes probably he will love me more...but hold on! I don't like the way he left me alone....."

"Should I tell the manager..I have never even seen him..."

"Should I steal the jewels and make myself a queen.....no stealing is bad..."

"Aha!I have a brilliant idea..."

She wrapped her discovery nicely and hid it securely waiting for the next Sabath ... ...."Sabath is only a day to go ..the Pastor will decide.." she was as excited as pregnant porcupine...