When There is No Time Left

“We have all the time in the world.”

Mrs Camp gripped the wheel of her beat up van tighter as she tried to calm her nagging teenaged son. The car steadily made its way through rolling Kansas fields and open blue skies. The radio in the background played a catchy country tune. Mrs Camp began to tap the wheel and nod her head to the beat, hoping to distract her young son from his desires.

“But when will we ever be passing the world's largest ball of twine again, I need it for my weird things book,” her son said in a young whiney teenaged tone 

“ You and your book,” Mrs Camp chuckled as she reached over and opened the glove side passenger seat, “Did you take your pills? Your shoulder must be acting up by now.

“Mom, I don’t know about this stuff, it makes me feel kind of sick.” 

Mrs. Camp reached over and shuffled her son's long black hair..

“The doctor did say there would be some side effects but it's the only thing on the market currently that will last all day, so you don't have to take a bunch of pills.. remember sweetie?” 

“I guess so,” he said in a deflated tone.

Mrs. Camp turned back up the radio and focused back on the long stretch of road before her. When thinking about it, she had noticed a change in her son since the accident last winter. Blaming herself for letting him drive in the snow and after surgery, she had made the decision to reach out to her doctor for pain. She thanked God at the time that it just so happened a new pain wonder drug was on the market.

She started to zone out to the tune of the radio. Its sweet melody was the same song they played on the way to the pain clinic. She remembered how the doctor said there was no risk of addiction. Of course as a mother she had noticed things, he grew tired quicker even sometimes seeming impaired, yet the doctor reassured her there was no cause for concern. 

She noticed how beautiful the country sky was. Her and her son had taken many road trips for football before but this time she thought to herself ‘did I ever even take the time to enjoy it’. The stress of the tournaments, the equipment and now the pain management had made these trips a chore. Mrs. Camp decided to enjoy it this time, who knows when would have another. 

A worrying thought popped into her head. She remembered how her son had begun recently waking up in pain. The doctor said if it interrupted his sleep again that he would bump up his dose? How would he do that from miles away and her son's prescription now was running out quicker. Everytime he felt pain she just gave him another one, clearly a new solution had to be reached

Inhale. Exhale. He is a professional and he said they can go on this trip. She decided she would not let the anxiety ruin this precious time. She would take this drive to enjoy her son and when he brought his team victory she would beam with pride without a worry on her mind.

“We are seeing that ball of yarn, get your camera!”

The beat down van made a quick u-turn.

Excitement built in Mrs. Camp’s chest as they got closer to their ‘stringy’ destination. The bonding experience between parent and child was something she felt she lacked recently. Everyday after school a new habit of his was to lock himself in his room for hours after practice. 

She looked over at him and gave a sad grin. He looked much older to her than when he got in the accident at 16, now he looks almost 18. Pain and secrets made his eyes dark and sunken. She wondered who this boy sitting next to her was becoming. A once sunny disposition now is replaced with an aloof or angry attitude. Her friends all assured her it was just teenaged stuff but this was differnt. 

Her son could become a ball of rage. Throwing things about and looking frantically for something his mother could not figure out. She assumed it was his football equipment and that it was the stress of scholarships driving him mad. But the sneaking out of the house that came after an angry incident she just couldn’t understand or stop. Partying constantly with new friends. Nothing worked, no grounding or taking the phone. She even considered asking the coach to remove him for the team… but the scholarships were necessary for any kind of bright future.

When they got closer to their destination she looked over at her son again. To her now he looked almost 25. His skinny frame hidden by a long sleeve hoodie he constantly picked at the arms of. What had happened to this child's bright future. His mother knew he would be no professional, but football had the chance to raise him to a new standard of life other than gloomy West Virginia. A lot of miners from their small town now looked similar to how this ghost of a man looked. A lot of people started to blame that new medication but Mrs Camp saw no reason for it. The doctor said only people who would have become addicts anyways become addicted and that wasn’t her son… he was just going through some anxiety after college did not pan out for him.

Mrs Camp pulled her car in front of their destination. Her eyes opened wide in amazement. Sitting in a large red  inclosement was the world largest ball of twine. Its presents were intimidating but filled her with wonder. The thick tan strings tangled together tight like the moments in her life made a giant mess of a ball.

She looks over to where her son once sat, now only a book and instant camera remained. 

She took a wrinkled hand, picked up the camera and hit the button. 

The flash of the camera did not startle her somber mood. 

Once the picture was printed, she ripped it and began to slowly shake. As she glued the picture into her son’s photo book she whispered to herself: 

“We have all the time in the world.”

She knew this statement was wrong.