Poison Ivy

Poison Ivy

It was dark tonight, really dark, no moon, just that damn flashing red light. The light was flashing in time with my heartbeat, thump, thump, thump. I sat there with his body in the trunk and I was surprisingly calm. I had a decision to make, turn right and go home, forget everything, or turn left and go to the desert to bury this body, then keep driving, live an unknown life.

This shitshow started with a woman. She was so vibrant, and her tits were mesmerizing. They bounced every time she moved, yummy, so hypnotic!

I was spending time at my favorite bar with my buddy Mylo. He was already 2 drinks in, playing darts by himself.

“What’s up bro?” Mylo asked when he saw me walk up.

“Nothing much, work sucked today,” I answered.

“Well, Jenny will be here soon. Let’s toss some darts!” Mylo said.

We were in the middle of the game when something caught my eye. I looked down towards the bar and there she was, sitting all alone. My immediate thought was to rescue this beautiful woman from solitude. Well, that was the worst mistake of my life! If I had a time machine, I would go back to this moment and just continue with my game of darts with Mylo, but I didn’t of course, so here we go!

Tuesday 6:45pm

I had to take a shot and started walking towards her. Another guy beat me to her but she scowled at him and sent him packing. Oh shit, this was not going to go well, so I decided to just sit at the bar and chill.

Tuesday 7:15pm

“You like the Bills?” I asked.

“What?” she responded, sounding a little annoyed.

“Never mind,” I responded.

She looked at me, with a curious expression on her face, then asked, “You buying me a drink?”

I smiled and thought, “fuck yea!” I needed to pause a minute to make sure I didn’t say that out loud.

“What you drinking?” I asked.

“Martini,” she said, pointing to her empty glass.

“Two martinis,” I told the bartender, and I turned my attention back to her and asked, “What are you up to?” God, I sounded like an idiot!

“What?” she asked, looking amused.

Ok, this is a flaming disaster. I was acting like a 5 year old on the school playground. What was my next move, pull her hair and run away?

“So, are you taking me somewhere?” she asked smiling seductively.

“Ummm, yeah, hang on a minute!” I said a little too excitedly.

I walked over to Mylo and let him know that I was leaving. I pointed to the blonde beauty at the bar and he just smiled and nodded knowingly.

I did not know it yet, but there was a hidden agenda, ugh, isn’t there always?

Now, I have not dated or talked to a woman in forever. I mostly sit at home night after night writing. I live out my life through the characters in my stories, but now I have the chance to have some fun, or so I thought.

I walked back over to her and said, “Let’s get out of here, we can go to my place.”

She smiled again and said, “For sure, I’ve had enough of these losers hitting on me.”

Knowing what I know now, I should’ve just kept to myself and played darts with Mylo, but my dick was in charge right now.

We hopped into my truck and she immediately moved her hand up my thigh and I thought, “holy shit, this was too good to be true!” I should have listened to myself. In the very near future, I would be in a shit show and end up in a fuck ton of trouble.

Her hand was now grasping my cock. I was only a couple blocks away, I pushed down on the gas peddle and was so distracted, I blew through a red light.

When we got to my house, I took full advantage of the situation and of her.

Early the next morning, she got dressed, went down to the kitchen and let me know she had to go. She wrote her number on a napkin and set it on the bar in the kitchen. I thought this was going to be a one night stand, until…

Wednesday 6:20am

I woke up to someone beating on the door. What the fuck? Couldn’t be Jehovah’s Witnesses, the pounding was too hard and fast. Cops maybe? I looked through a crack in the blinds and immediately heard the BOOM of a shotgun.

I dove behind the bar and thought, “oh shit, my pistol was in my bedroom.” Glass was everywhere… BOOM! The shotgun went off again and the door flew open. I ran over and shut the door before he could get in. As I was trying to get it closed, he started screaming, “Where’s she at?!”

“I don’t fucking know what you’re talking about!” I yelled back and ran back to my bedroom.

I grabbed my 9mm and made sure I had one in the chamber. It was go time! I ran back to the front door and BOOM! He blew a giant hole in my door, then kicked it in. I aimed and fired my gun, POP…POP…POP…POP! One bullet found it’s mark, right in his forehead and his head burst open like an eggshell! He fell to his knees and fell over so he was in a sitting position, propped up in the doorway.

Who the fuck was this clown? I had some serious shit going on in my apartment!

I gotta call Mylo and pulled out my phone, “Hey bro, you gotta come over…NOW!”

Mylo sounded like he just woke up and replied, “Ok, be over in a minute.”

I stood there trying to make sense of this. I had some fat fuck bleeding all over my floor. I grabbed the fucker, wrapped him in a tarp and shoved him in my trunk. Mylo will know what to do and he pulled up just as I closed my trunk.

“What the fuck bro? Do you know what time it is?” Mylo said.

“Yeah, it’s been a fucked up morning,” I told him, opening my trunk for him to see.

“You gotta call the police!” Mylo shouted.

“No! No cops,” I said firmly.

“Well then, shit, bury him in the desert. Who is he anyway?” Mylo asked.

I reached in his pocket and grabbed his wallet. I opened it up and started to look through it.

I pulled out a business card and said, “he had this in his wallet,” and showed it to Mylo.

It was a card to a dance club downtown called, Miss Lacy’s. I decided to check it out.

Wednesday 7pm

Well, it was a nice place, considering it was a topless establishment. Then I saw her, my blonde beauty at the bar.

I walked up to her and said, “We gotta quit meeting like this.”

Ivy smiled and replied, “Well, well, very nice to see you again, Jonathan!”

I whipped out my phone and showed her some pictures I took of the dude in my trunk.

“Wanna tell me who this is?” I asked.

“Oh shit, you killed Rocko!” she gasped.

“Who the fuck is Rocko and why did he come to my apartment to try and kill me?” I asked, trying to keep my voice down.

“Rocko works for my manager, Deisel,” she said. “Deisel thinks he owns me and gets very jealous. He has Rocko follow me.”

She looked very afraid. I told her, “Well Rocko is going to be bothering you anymore.”

Ivy put her hand on my arm and said, “Jonathan, Mylo hired me to show you a good time. I never should have stayed the night.”

She stood right in front of me, looking up into my eyes and said, “I can’t explain it, but I think I’m falling in love with you. We need to run. Deisel is a very dangerous and scary man!”

“I’ll handle Deisel. You go and meet me at Cheap Skates Motel off of Highway 27 in one hour. Now where do I find Deisel?” I asked.

“He’s upstairs. Jonathan, be careful. I don’t think you understand how dangerous he is,” Ivy said.

“Just meet me in 1 hour,” I told her walking towards the stairs.

Fuck my life. I am in a pile of shit now. I checked my pistol to make sure it was loaded and asked the bartender for an envelope.

Before I could start up the stairs, I was intercepted by some Lurch motherfucker. I looked over to the private VIP section and was waved over by a guy who resembled a stereotypical Italian mobster.

I walked over and we introduced ourselves. This was that asshole, Deisel.

I glared at him and said, “I’m taking Ivy away from here. I will pay you to leave her alone.”

“Homeboy feels he’s in a position to dictate here boys,” Deisel said looking at his 2 goons. They both laughed and I handed Deisel the envelope I got from the bartender. He took it, opened it and inside was nothing.

“Oh, we got a comedian here. Where the fuck is Ivy?” Deisel growled.

“I am taking her with me,” I said, not breaking eye contact.

Deisel motioned to his goons and said, “fuck him up!”

Here comes the shit show. I pulled out my pistol and put 2 in one guy and 3 in the other. I pointed my gun at Deisel.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Here, take this.” Deisel said pushing a bag full of cash towards me.

“What the fuck is this? You think this bag of cash is going to stop me from putting a bullet between your eyes?” I said, glaring at him.

“Listen, just take the cash and fuck off, John Wayne!” Deisel yelled.

I continued to stare into his eyes and thought about all the women in this club that he abuses and…POP!

Wednesday 9:10pm

Here I was at that light. Turn left, go to my girl waiting at the motel, have a bag full of cash, and head to Mexico. Turn right, go home, probably go to prison. Not a hard decision.

It’s weird how things work out. My poison Ivy wasn’t poison at all. We had our son and 4.2 million in cash. We had enough to buy a dream.