Mr. Luke's self Sabotage

He sat down on the chair placed outside the road safety commission's office boiling in anger. He felt like beating himself up for his stupidity. He was seriously wondering if he had not been the reason behind his own lack of advancement to the next level in life. 

Not actually that he is in the class referred to as classless, someone in the class refers to as third in badly managed economy like the Nigerians should be happy but, “is it not people born of women that were in the first?” He queried himself. “why for goodness sake must I be stuck in third due to my carelessness”

     “ when would this my self sabotage comes to an end?” he asked aloud. He sat there out of anger mopping into empty space.

He had filled form for the new driving license government were advocating for in the commission’s office, due to the crowd, it takes months after payment and form filling for you to go for image capturing, there was no prior announcement on any additional documents outside traditional ones to come with, but the country’s way of doing things can’t be said to be normal. Anyone can come out with any directive at anytime and order it to be law.

Going there with his state identification number had cropped up this morning in his mind, he had ignored it with logic that since driving license is federal project, state has no part to play in it. 

Now, it is first requirements for capturing. He had seem those turned back before him, believing that they did not make their point well. He sat there believing he can talk them into reasoning with him. He sat there for more than two hours refining his tale in his mind. 

       “ no one ever asked of that document not even state

         Government, why would federal then?” 

He eyed his time piece and it was well over 12:00 noon. Going back to his house for that document would take him about one and half hour and judging from crowd here, he can’t make it that very day anymore. The office closes around 4:00pm.

The scenario means he has to wait for a month again to try. 

He murmured what only him understood and walk slowly to his car feeling dejected and angry. It is so annoying for the incidents like this one wasn’t the first time he has been in similar situation due to his oversight and wrong judgements. They are even becoming part of his life story.

He sign loudly in his car while heading to his office. He had tasked himself months ago to always heed that intuitions of his but the negative force always gets the better of him. Now, it is a months delay. He opened his diary to note the incident. He unconsciously started reading similar recording in his diary that seems to stretch to infinitum.  

Time is money, one month is like deducting a month from his chances of making money, having peace of mind, and channeling his energy into other endeavors. How can he compete then?

        “ If I keep walking backwards due to my carelessness, I will     remain as I am today. No growth” he said to himself.

       “ No, it must be time to always do the opposite of the 

         Loudest voice whenever that intuitions strikes” he 

        Concluded.

Two days later, he was in the shower to honor appointment in the bank, it had occurred to him to put that bank's credit card in his wallet for he is not in the habit of carrying around all his banks credit cards. He had gathered other relevant documents and had gone halfway to the bank when it occurred to him that he wasn’t with the card and the bank might require expired card before issuing him new one. He turned around and went back home to get it. 

Instead of kicking himself for his oversight, he started singing for he had determined that he is dealing with forces that are hell bent in nonsensing him. The only way to train himself into paying more attention to his intuitions is to not always sulk and blame himself but to sing and pretend not to care.

      “ If I can continue in this format, this deceptive spirit would

        Soon lost interest in me and give my intuitive spirit enough

        breathing space to thrive” 

He had kept to that method of turning back joyfully whenever that forgetfulness or is it oversight strikes even if he had gone into the journey 80 percent that through observing trends in his journal, it seems to be working.

He was in the filling station to fill his tank when it flashed out of blues for him to enter their mechanic pit for alignment check. That is what he does every two months but it still has about three weeks for next appointment with his mechanic. He is not in the habit of playing logic whenever that intuitions strikes these days. He drove the car to the mechanic who seem to spent better part of his day reading sport news. 

After only few minutes into the pit, the mechanic called him into the pit to point out certain things to him. 

Whether his mechanic don’t tighten the wheels bolts well last time he worked on them or that someone tampered with it. How can the bolts both in front and back wheels be almost 80 percent loose and yet, he didn’t feel them in his starring. He smiled to himself and decided that from that moment, he got himself a new mechanic.

       “ imagine what would have happened had I

        been speeding as usual on high way”

He rushed to enter the incidents in his journal. His reactions to the intuitions or whatever it is not only paying off, it has started saving his life too. On getting back to his house, he sat down in his living room for a long time wondering if someone paid his mechanic to do that, he could not just believe that someone would be carrying four heads following him around to loosen his wheels.

He was wondering what the results would have been had he not heeded that flash of intuition to enter that mechanic pit.

Mr. Luke Odili can’t be said to be religious person, but what happened at the filling station has passed that debate. What possesses him now is nothing but fear that is internalize. 

He decided that he has to visit chapel and talk one on one with his God for saving his life from unknown enemies and ask him to expose whoever that enemy is.

He went to the cupboard where he had banished his Bible and prayer books to dust them for preparation for morning appointment with God. He had pulled one sacramental from where it has been forgotten for years, adjusted it’s ropes to suit his taste and waited for tomorrow.

Next morning at the chapel, he had spent about one hour praying and wishing that the intuitions that flashed should be rated as wrong one. 

    “How can God demand what came to him from a man like him.

     How can he want me to give up woman and alcohol at the same 

     Time.” 

 He concluded that his hunches were wrong. God should take one and I keep the other. His hand unconsciously went to his neck to finger the sacramental. To his chagrin, there was nothing there. He remembers that he had promised to put it on in the car and was surprised to realize that he is relapsing into abyss he thought he had reined in.  “this is reason I don’t like coming to church” he screamed in the chapel to the surprise of others in there.