Villain by Bureaucracy

"Notorious Super Villain Ethereal Spear Strikes Again As He Destroys Prison To Break Out A Man Named Markus Kay!" Lance read aloud, a smirk curling his lips as he sipped his espresso at a small Italian café.

"I see you made the front page again," a familiar voice remarked. The sound of a chair scraping against the stone pavement cut through the quiet atmosphere as Bryce Benson, one of the world’s leading superheroes, took a seat across from Lance, his expression a mix of annoyance and begrudging respect.

Lance didn’t bother looking up. "You crossed a line," he said casually, folding the paper neatly and setting it aside.

Bryce scoffed, leaning back in his chair. "I crossed a line? You’re one to talk after what you did with Maxine."

At this, Lance finally met Bryce’s gaze, his eyes narrowing with a dangerous glint. "Maxine made her own choice. I merely provided a better opportunity. You, on the other hand, kidnapped my tailor."

Bryce leaned forward, his tone growing colder. "We arrested him for aiding and abetting known criminals. It’s called justice, Lance."

"Oh, please." Lance waved a hand dismissively. "Justice? You kidnapped my tailor just because he made me look better than you. That’s not justice."

"Arrested," Bryce added.

Lance continued, "What’s next? Will you kidnap my barber? My dentist? Actually, feel free to take my dentist; the man’s an absolute sadist."

Bryce’s patience was wearing thin. "We do not kidnap, Lance. We enforce the law and arrest."

"Tomato, to-mah-to," Lance quipped, a mischievous grin on his face. "The point is, you’re inconveniencing me. Now I have to wait two more days for my blue ivory suit. And trust me, Bryce, you don’t want to see me in anything less than my best."

Bryce rolled his eyes. "The only suit you’ll be getting is—"

"A one-piece orange jumpsuit," Lance interrupted, finishing Bryce’s sentence with a mocking tone. "God, you’re so predictable. Sometimes I wonder how you became one of the top ten superheroes of our generation."

"You know exactly how, Lance. And if you don’t, you’ll figure it out when I put you and all five hundred and forty-two of your henchmen behind bars."

"Five hundred and forty-seven," Lance corrected, a hint of pride in his voice. "We had four recruits start yesterday. Promising group, really. And you’re forgetting Maxine. Or are you deliberately leaving her out of the count?"

Bryce’s expression darkened. "Maxine hasn’t committed any crimes. She doesn’t belong in your twisted world."

Lance leaned forward, lowering his voice. "Must be tough seeing your fiancé switching sides. Or is it a former fiancé?"

"She’ll be back."

Lance’s smirk widened. "No, I don’t think she will. Do you know why?"

Bryce remained silent, his jaw tightening.

Lance’s tone grew more serious. "Because she doesn’t believe in your justice. She spent five years chasing the Red Fox group. When she finally caught the leader, you all did nothing but kidnap him for a week."

"Arrested," Bryce quickly corrected.

"Whatever. The point is, he spent a week in jail before he was set free. That is not justice."

"And what you did was?" Bryce asked, anger creeping into his voice.

Lance’s eyes hardened as he leaned in closer with a sinister smile. "I put nine bullets in him two hours after he walked free. And you know what? I saved lives because of that. If I hadn’t, he’d be right back to his old ways, hurting innocent people. Your system is flawed, Bryce, and you know it."

"My system is based on rules and order to keep everyone safe! I know it’s not perfect, but it’s what society voted on. You, however, are a vigilante who does more harm than good. You steal, you kill—"

"I do what needs to be done!" Lance cut in. "Open your eyes, Bryce. Your system may be what society voted on, but that doesn’t make it right."

Lance chuckled. "I do more hero work than you. Remember last month when Dr. Vex started destroying the city with his particle machine?"

"I remember. We were preparing to strike…"

"Cut the crap. You were waiting for the higher-ups to give you the green light. Meanwhile, people were dying," Lance said.

"We need to prepare. We strategize and send the best team out to get maximum results while doing as little collateral damage to the city. We can’t just rush into things," Bryce explained.

"You could send someone immediately to prevent casualties, but your hero group doesn’t even do that. Which caused nine people to die before someone showed up to stop him, and guess who stopped him?"

"You shot him in the head fifteen times."

"Yeah, after I shot him in the torso about a dozen times. He was a supervillain; they don’t die easily. But you’re right. I saved the people, and where were you? Waiting for paperwork to clear?"

Bryce stiffened. "We were following protocol."

"Goddamn, man! People are dying, and you're worried about paperwork," Lance muttered. "There’s so much bureaucracy that the world will burn before you save it because you’re too busy with red tape."

Bryce said nothing, his frustration palpable.

Lance leaned back, a hint of bitterness creeping into his voice. "You know what’s ironic? From when I was a kid until I was maybe twenty, I wanted nothing more than to be like you—a hero and part of the Heroes organization. And it was around that time that I finally got my chance, but things didn’t work out."

Bryce sat back. "You wanted to be part of the organization?"

"More than anything at the time."

"What happened?" Bryce asked.

"Bureaucracy happened," Lance said, glancing at his watch. "I don’t believe I ever really told anyone how I became the man that sits before you."

Bryce shook his head. "Your origin story is the only one that remains a secret to the organization."

"That’s because it’s as dull as they come. There is no tragic death that pushed me down this path or betrayal by a close friend or former lover. Just a dorky young man trying too hard," Lance said, sitting back in his chair.

"Well, let’s hear it," Bryce said, asking the waitress to bring two more cups of coffee.

Lance sighed. "Sure, why not?

"As I said, when I was young, being a hero was all I ever thought about. It was a summer evening, and I was walking home from a part-time job at the market when I passed an old building where I saw a small group of heroes fly in. I was curious and did what any curious young man would do. I ignored the keep-out sign, jumped the fence, and went in for a closer look.

I wasn’t even close to the building’s window when I heard the battle going on inside. My heart raced as I reached the window and went to peer inside.

“‘Now look what you did!’ was all I heard before the heroes fled the building in an instant.

"I looked back inside to see what happened but never got the chance. The building was engulfed in a purple light before it exploded.

"I’m not sure what the purple light source was, but it detached me from my body because I watched my body and the building explode. Looking at your unconscious self from an ethereal plane is a strange feeling. I thought I was dead and started to panic. I immediately tried to jump back into my body.

"I screamed in pain as I entered my body and realized that was a mistake. I jumped right back out and waited. Eventually, paramedics arrived and took me to the hospital. I roamed around as a spirit for a few weeks while waiting for my body to heal. There was no way I was going back into it in that condition. But during that time, I could only think about becoming a hero because I now had powers.

"Eventually, I was up and moving around again in my own body. And I wasted no time heading right to the local hero center.

"I expected something completely different from what happened. I thought I would be welcomed and given a tour while being inducted into the group. Instead, I was given a clipboard and forms to fill out. Afterward, I was told to wait until a representative could talk to me. I waited for four hours. It was worse than the DMV, but I was too excited to be deterred.

"Charles, the representative, didn’t give me much of his time. He handed me a slip that allowed me to check out the rules of being a hero. He told me to read and memorize the rules and return to take a test in a month to see if I would be accepted.

"I probably should have been a little upset by now, but I wasn’t. I was still as excited as a kid in a candy store. So, I went to the hero's library to check out the book. A disgruntled woman sat at the desk working. I gave her the slip and asked for help. She reached to her left and handed me a tattered old book with no cover. I thanked her, but she just blew me off with a wave of her hand.

"I wasn’t bothered, though. I raced home and started reading. I committed everything in that book to memory.

"I read the first rule:

Rule One: Pick a name. Be sure to pick a name that will be memorable, easy to say, and strike fear in your enemies.

"It took me days, but I came up with the name Ethereal Spear and was quite proud of it.

"I moved on to the next rule:

Rule Two: Develop an unwavering code that will be upheld no matter what. I didn’t give that much thought. I knew what I wanted and what would be asked of me.

"Rule Three: Develop a powerful image. Remember, the suit makes the man, not the other way around.

"I spent days making costumes. I tried on more tights and leotards than I could count but never found the right one. Eventually, I gave up and went to find help. There was a small tailor at the end of the road that I walked by every morning. I walked in and explained my situation. The tailor gave me a dark teal suit to try on. I was against it at first. You never see heroes battling in suits, but I humored him, tried it on, and fell in love with it the instant I did.

"Rule Four: Gather followers. I was embarrassed at the time about this fact, but now I’m proud to admit that my first true follower was my grandmother. She gave me unwavering support until her last breath. Besides her, I had my tailor, some local teenagers who lived on my block, and Mrs. Humbert, who lived next door.

"Rule Five: Become a master of diplomacy. I spent days looking for people having problems and constantly stepped in to try and resolve them. I didn’t have a lot of success at first, but the second they saw I had powers, things became much easier. I also started mastering other languages. Currently, I can speak over forty languages, two of which are fake and used on TV only.

"Rule Six: Use advanced technology to the fullest extent. This was a very expensive rule. The only thing my broke ass could afford to do at the time was subscribe to one or two tech magazines.

"Rule Seven: Be resourceful. I didn’t do much for this but always made sure I had a plan B and a plan C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, and so on.

"Rule Eight: Have an impeccable lair. I wasn’t comfortable with the word 'lair' but mentally, I just changed it to 'headquarters.' I turned my grandmother’s basement into my first lair," Lance said, using air quotes.

"A little side note: eventually, I bought everyone’s house on the block and connected every basement to one another to make my first ultimate lair," Lance added, using air quotes again.

"Rule Nine: Plan meticulously. The book instructed me to devise elaborate schemes with multiple contingencies. At this rule, I became aware that something was wrong and I might not have the hero book I was supposed to. However, the book was short, having only ten core rules to master, so I decided to at least see it through to the end.

"Rule Ten: Embrace a personal philosophy that justifies your actions, no matter how ruthless they are. I was still set on becoming a hero, so I had no intentions of following rule ten.

"After I finished the book, I returned to the organization to get the correct one. That’s when I started getting discouraged. I was ignored for an hour, and when someone finally did talk to me, they reported me for having a restricted book. I tried to explain the misunderstanding, but no one cared.

"After my reprimand, I was given the correct book and told I would be put on a sidekick waiting list. I would be forced to wait for a hero needing a sidekick to pick me from hundreds of other potential candidates. Something that can take years, potentially never happening.

"I left feeling defeated, but that didn’t last long. As I walked home, I saw an opportunity to prove myself. As I passed an officer, I overheard him talking about a bank being robbed. The bank was nearby, and I knew I could help, so I raced over.

"I learned how to make my entire body and anything attached to it, like clothes, go incorporeal. So, I changed forms, walked through the back walls, and snuck in. There were three robbers, all armed.

"I stayed out of sight and used my powers to steal each of their guns slowly. In a few minutes, the three of them were all looking aimlessly for where they had misplaced their weapons. I then snuck out of the bank and informed the police that I had disarmed all the robbers and that it was safe for them to enter.

"I felt good about what I did. I knew I would get high praise for my actions and maybe an award, but if none of that happened, it would definitely help with my standings in the Heroes organization.

"I couldn’t have been more wrong. The next night, I sat in a prison cell, thinking about what had gone wrong, but I couldn’t come up with anything. I was kidnapped for doing the right thing."

"Arrested," Bryce corrected.

"A day later, another representative from the organization came by to talk to me about my powers and ask me questions. I thought he was going to clear everything up for me, but he wasn’t. I was now a felon for acting outside of the law. He told me I put everyone in danger, and now I needed to take responsibility for my actions.

"When I arrived at the bank, two people were already dead, and more would have died if I had done nothing. What the representative said didn’t make sense to me, and as I sat there and thought about it, I realized something was wrong with the hero’s organization.

"That’s when Rule Ten took effect, and I had a choice to make at that moment: follow the faulty heroes or my own path, even if it goes against the heroes.

"The representative continued berating me as I stood up, turned incorporeal, and walked out of the prison."

The two said nothing for a long moment.

"So, we failed you?" Bryce asked.

"No. The organization you work for has failed me. As well as many other heroes and civilians."

"The organization is not that bad," Bryce defended.

Lance smiled. "Let me put it to you this way. Your health insurance policy covers sixty percent of your bills. My company's health insurance policy only requires a ten-dollar co-pay for anything."

Bryce gave Lance a skeptical look.

"It’s true," Lance said, standing to his feet and stretching.

Lance reached into his pocket, pulled out some cash, and put it on the table. It was enough to cover the drinks and leave a generous tip.

"You know, I’m here to bring you in," Bryce said as Lance turned to leave.

Lance stopped and turned back to Bryce for a moment. "You’re stronger and faster than me, but I’m smarter than you. Every time we meet, I end up walking away the second you turn your back. You can’t contain me, Bryce. And as for the backup you have surrounding me, my team dealt with them while we talked. Now that they have been subdivided, it’s time for me to get on with my day: things to do and all."

Lance took a step and stopped, reached into his coat pocket, pulled out a paper, and handed it to Bryce.

"What’s this?"

"An application for when you’re ready to be a true hero." And with that, Lance left the café.