Sleeping with my Son

Chapter 1:

As the sun dipped below the Richmond skyline, casting a golden glow on the city's historic buildings, I stepped off the bus, my heart pounding with anticipation. It had been two decades since I'd last set foot in this town, a place that held both my deepest secrets and a chance for a fresh start. I inhaled the familiar scent of magnolia blossoms, a reminder of my youth, and felt a surge of emotions wash over me.

I had just turned thirty-five, and my life was at a crossroads. Leaving my job in New York City had been a bold move, but the offer from Virginia Commonwealth University was too tempting to resist. I'd be working alongside brilliant minds in the biology department, a far cry from my humble beginnings as a teenage mother.

"Welcome back, Denise," I whispered to myself, my voice carrying a mixture of trepidation and excitement. The once-quiet streets were now lined with trendy cafes and bustling students. I couldn't help but feel a sense of nostalgia for the simpler times, when my biggest worry was keeping my baby's cries muffled so Mrs. Johnson from next door wouldn't hear.

My thoughts drifted to the past, to the man who had stolen my innocence and given me a child. He was a married man, twice my age, and the scandal had rocked my family. I recalled the heart-wrenching decision to give my baby up for adoption, knowing it was the only way to provide him with a better life. It was a choice that still haunted me, leaving an ache in my heart that only time could dull.

"Excuse me, ma'am, can you show me the way to the campus?" A young man's voice snapped me out of my reverie. I turned to find a pair of deep brown eyes gazing at me, filled with a hint of nervousness.

"Oh, yes, sure. I'm heading that way myself. It's just a few blocks down," I replied, smiling warmly. He had an air of innocence about him, and I felt an instant connection, as if we shared a secret bond.

As we walked, the stranger introduced himself as Shawn. He was a biology major, eager to make a difference in the world, and his enthusiasm was infectious. I found myself drawn to his youthful spirit, a stark contrast to the jaded souls I'd left behind in the city.

"You seem to know your way around, Denise. Are you from Richmond?" Shawn asked, his voice carrying a hint of a Southern drawl.

"Yes, I am. I grew up in the East End. But I left when I was fifteen and only recently moved back. It's like I'm seeing my hometown with new eyes." I shared a bit of my story, carefully omitting the more scandalous details.

"That's amazing! I've always felt a connection to this city, even though I'm adopted and don't know much about my biological family. I guess some things are just meant to be," he said.

My heart skipped a beat as his words echoed my own thoughts. Could it be? No, it was too much of a coincidence. I shook off the notion, attributing it to my overactive imagination.

"Well, here we are," I announced as we reached the university gates. The campus buzzed with activity, students rushing to classes, laughter echoing across the quad.

"Thank you for the company, Denise. It was nice to meet you," Shawn said, his smile reaching his eyes. "Maybe I'll see you around campus?"

"Maybe you will," I replied, my voice laced with a hint of flirtation. I watched him walk away, his broad shoulders and confident stride catching the attention of passing girls. A small part of me wondered if I'd met my future, unaware that our pasts were already intertwined.

I felt would be just the beginning of a complex web of emotions and revelations. As fate would have it, our next encounter would be sooner than I expected, and it would ignite a flame that threatened to consume us both. The universe, it seemed, had a mischievous plan in store, one that would change our lives forever.

Chapter 2:

The following weeks flew by in a blur of laboratory equipment and research papers as I immersed myself in my new role at the university. VCU's biology department was a bustling hub of intellectual activity, and I felt right at home among the test tubes and microscopes. Despite the demanding work, my mind often wandered back to that chance encounter with Shawn. There was something about his youthful charm and inquisitive nature that left a lasting impression.

One Friday evening, as I packed up my things, ready to call it a week, a familiar voice startled me.

"Denise, right? From the East End? I knew I'd run into you again." Shawn's cheerful greeting filled the empty lab.

"Shawn! What a surprise. I didn't take you for a night owl, burning the midnight oil in the lab," I replied, my voice light and playful.

"Oh, I'm usually an early bird, but I've been working on a special project for one of my professors. It's fascinating stuff, really. I'm trying to identify a rare plant species in the Blue Ridge Mountains. Ever heard of it? They call it the 'Mountain's Mystery'."

"Sounds intriguing. I've always been more of a city girl, but I appreciate the beauty of nature. So, what brings you here at this hour?" I asked, leaning against the lab counter, enjoying the unexpected company.

"Well, I needed to use the advanced microscope for my research, and it's less crowded now. But enough about me. How have you been settling in? It's not easy being the new kid on the block, especially in a place like this."

I chuckled, "You have no idea. It's been a whirlwind. I'm still finding my footing, but the work is fascinating. And Richmond has changed so much, it's like discovering it all over again."

"I can relate. Even though I've lived here my whole life, there's always something new to explore. Hey, I know it's short notice, but I was wondering if you'd like to grab a bite? There's this great diner downtown, and I'd love to hear more about your adventures in the big city."

His invitation caught me off guard, but I found myself saying yes before my mind could process the implications. "I'd love to. Give me five minutes to freshen up, and I'll meet you by the main entrance."

As I hurried to the restroom, my heart raced with a mix of excitement and apprehension. I hadn't dated much in New York, preferring to focus on my career. But there was something about Shawn that sparked my interest, a connection I hadn't felt in years.

**At the diner:**

We settled into a cozy booth, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and fried food filling the air. The place buzzed with the lively chatter of patrons, creating a comforting ambiance.

"This is my favorite spot in the whole city," Shawn said, his eyes sparkling with enthusiasm. "Their burgers are legendary, and the milkshakes... well, you'll see."

"I can already tell this is going to be a regular spot for me too. So, tell me, Shawn, what's your story? You mentioned being adopted. Was it hard growing up not knowing your biological family?"

A hint of sadness crossed his face, but he quickly offered a warm smile. "It was difficult at times, especially as a teenager. I always felt this void, a missing piece of my identity. But my adoptive parents are amazing. They've supported me in every way, and I'm forever grateful. I guess that's why I'm so determined to find my birth mother. I want to thank her for giving me life and let her know I turned out okay."

His words struck a chord deep within me. I found myself reaching across the table, my hand covering his. "Shawn, I can't even begin to imagine how challenging that must've been. But I truly believe everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, giving up something precious is the greatest act of love."

Our eyes locked, and in that moment, I felt a connection so intense, it took my breath away. Shawn's gaze softened, and he leaned forward, his voice barely above a whisper. "You're an incredible woman, Denise. I feel like I've known you forever."

My heart raced, and I leaned in closer, our faces mere inches apart. "I feel the same way. It's like we're kindred spirits, destined to meet."

Without warning, Shawn's eyes widened, and he pulled away, breaking the spell. "I-I should get the check. It's getting late, and I don't want to keep you."

Confused by his sudden change in demeanor, I nodded, my heart sinking. "Sure, that's probably a good idea."

As he rose to signal the waiter, I couldn't shake the feeling that something was amiss. Had I misread the situation? The evening had started so perfectly, but now I was left with more questions than answers.

**Outside the diner:**

We walked in silence, the night air cool against our heated skin. As we reached the university letters, Shawn turned to me, his expression unreadable.

"Denise, I want to see you again. But there's something I need to tell you. Something I should've mentioned earlier. It's just... complicated."

My heart skipped a beat, and I braced myself for his confession, sensing it would change everything. "Shawn, whatever it is, you can tell me. I promise I won't judge."

He took a deep breath, his eyes searching mine. "I've been searching for my birth mother for years. And I think... I think I've found her. I just got the results of a DNA test, and it led me to a woman here in Richmond."

My mind raced, a thousand thoughts swirling. Could it be? No, it couldn't be possible. I shook my head, denying the truth that was staring me in the face.

"Denise, I know this is a lot to take in. But I need to meet her, to understand why she gave me up. Can you help me, please? I need someone to support me through this."

I felt my world tilt on its axis, the realization hitting me like a ton of bricks. The man I was falling for, was drawn to like a moth to a flame, could be my son.

"Oh, Shawn..." My voice trailed off; my mind unable to form coherent words.

"I know this is a shock. Take your time, process it. But please, don't push me away. I need you now more than ever," his eyes pleading with mine.

I stood there, frozen, my heart torn between the joy of finding my son and the pain of knowing our relationship could never be what I'd hoped for.

"I-I need some time, Shawn. This is a lot to process. But I promise, I'll be there for you," I managed to say, my voice shaking.

Shawn's face lit up with relief, and he pulled me into a tight embrace. "Thank you, Denise. I knew you'd understand. I'll give you space, but please, don't shut me out."

As we parted ways, I watched him disappear into the night, my mind reeling. The universe had played a cruel joke, bringing us together, only to reveal the painful truth. I had fallen for my own son, and now, I had to find a way to untangle my heart's desires from the reality of our situation.

Chapter 3:

The days that followed were a blur of conflicting emotions and internal turmoil. I, Denise, found myself caught in a web of feelings, struggling to make sense of the revelation that threatened to upend my world. Shawn, the charming young man who had captured my heart, was my son. The son I had given birth to and held for a fleeting moment before letting him go. Now, he was back in my life, seeking answers and support, unaware of the true nature of our connection.

One afternoon, as I sat in my office, poring over research papers, Shawn knocked on my door, his presence both a comfort and a source of anxiety.

"Hey, Denise, you busy? I thought we could grab some lunch and catch up. I've been doing some digging, and I think I'm close to finding her," he said, his eyes alight with determination.

"Of course, Shawn. Come in. Let's talk," I replied, my voice steady, despite the turmoil within. I gestured to the chair across from my desk, and he sat, his posture exuding both eagerness and trepidation.

"I've been thinking a lot about what you said, about how giving up a child is an act of love. It's a perspective I never considered. But it still doesn't answer my questions. Why would she give me away? Was I not enough?" His voice cracked, revealing the vulnerability beneath his confident exterior.

I leaned forward, my heart aching for the young man before me. "Shawn, I can't speak for your birth mother, but sometimes life presents us with impossible choices. I'm sure she loved you, and her decision was made with a heavy heart."

"I want to believe that. But it's hard not to take it personally, you know? To wonder if there's something wrong with me," he confessed, his eyes pleading for reassurance.

"There's nothing wrong with you, Shawn. You're an incredible young man, kind and intelligent. Anyone would be proud to call you their son," I said, my voice thick with emotion.

His eyes met mine, and for a fleeting moment, I saw a spark of something deeper, a connection that went beyond the platonic. I quickly looked away, afraid to acknowledge the desire that simmered beneath the surface.

"Thank you, Denise. That means a lot, especially coming from you. You've become someone I trust, someone I can confide in," he said, his voice softening.

"We're in this together, Shawn. I'll help you find the answers you seek. And remember, your birth mother's decision was about her circumstances, not a reflection of your worth," I offered, reaching across the desk to squeeze his hand.

"I appreciate that. And I'm glad we're doing this together. It makes it all less scary," he said, his smile warming my heart.

As our fingers intertwined, a jolt of electricity coursed through me, and I quickly withdrew my hand, feigning a cough to hide my reaction. Shawn's eyes widened, a mixture of confusion and desire flashing across his face.

"Are you okay, Denise? You seem a bit flushed," he asked, concern lacing his words.

"I'm fine, just a bit of a tickle in my throat. Maybe it's time for that lunch?" I suggested, eager to change the subject.

**At a quaint café nearby:**

We sat across from each other, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filling the air. Shawn's eyes were fixed on me, a mixture of emotions playing across his handsome face.

"Denise, there's something I need to say. Something I've been feeling since we first met. I know it's probably inappropriate, given our... situation, but I can't deny it any longer," he began, his voice steady but filled with trepidation.

My heart pounded in my chest, and I held my breath, already knowing what was coming.

"I think I'm falling for you, Denise. You're beautiful, smart, and you understand me in a way no one else does. I know it's complicated, but I can't ignore these feelings any longer," he confessed, his eyes searching mine for acceptance.

My mind raced, torn between the joy of having my feelings reciprocated and the guilt of knowing our love was forbidden. I opened my mouth to respond, but words failed me.

"I know this is a lot to process," he continued, misinterpreting my silence. "And I understand if you don't feel the same way. I just had to get it off my chest."

"Shawn, I..." I began; my voice hoarse with emotion. "I care for you deeply, more than I should. But our circumstances are... complicated. There are things you don't know, things I can't explain right now."

His eyes widened, and he leaned forward, his voice urgent. "Then explain it to me, Denise. Let me in. I want to understand, I want to be there for you, no matter what."

I took a shaky breath, my heart torn between the desire to confess and the fear of losing him. "Shawn, there's something I haven't told you. Something that changes everything."

"What is it, Denise? You can trust me," he urged, his hand reaching across the table to cover mine.

I closed my eyes, summoning the courage to reveal the truth. "Shawn, I'm your mother. The woman you've been searching for is me."

The words hung in the air, heavy with implication. Shawn's eyes widened, and he pulled his hand away, his expression shifting from confusion to disbelief.

"That's not possible. My birth mother, she's..." He trailed off, his mind struggling to process the revelation.

"I know it's a shock, Shawn. I should've told you sooner, but I was scared. Scared of losing you, scared of what people would say. I never imagined we'd meet like this," I explained, my voice cracking.

"My own mother? But why? Why did you give me up?" he asked, his voice breaking.

"It's a long story; one I promise to tell you. But please, try to understand, it was the hardest decision I ever made. I was just a teenager, and I wanted to give you a better life," I pleaded, tears welling up in my eyes.

Shawn sat motionless, his mind grappling with the truth. Finally, he stood, his chair scraping against the floor. "I need to go. I need to process all of this."

"Shawn, please, don't go. Let me explain," I begged, reaching out to him.

He shook his head, his eyes filled with a mixture of pain and confusion. "I need some time, Denise. I'll be in touch."