Fighting Fires

Until I met Brian I prided myself on being someone who would never cheat on their mate. But Brian and I had such chemistry it was like fireworks, impossible to ignore.

But I’m getting ahead of myself. First, some background. I’m a soccer mom. I have two children, a girl thirteen, Shailey, and a boy, Jared, almost fifteen. They are close; they get along really well.

When the thing started with Brian it was of the utmost importance to me that the kids not find out. If their father cheated they would be disappointed in him but wouldn’t consider him a pariah which I know is what would be in store for me. That old double standard of “boys will be boys” while women are held to a higher standard still exists. I know because one of their friend’s mothers had the audacity to have an affair and the kids talked about her like she was a serial killer.

So, Brian. He’s a local fire fighter who, it seemed, every time I went to the supermarket, was there. God he was/is so hot. There’s just something about him, the way his dark hair hangs over his brow, and the way the fire fighter’s uniform hangs perfectly on his perfect body, not too muscular but just enough. And those arms and their sexy tattoos.

The third time we stood side by side staring into the frozen food case, I said, “We have to stop meeting like this.” Yes, that old line I was dying to use on someone.

“Well,” he said with that gorgeous grin of his, “what would you suggest?”

I was stunned, caught off guard that he took me seriously. “Um, well…”

“Think about it, er, what’s your name?”

I didn’t know if he was kidding or serious. “Elise,” I said. “Yours?”

He told me “Brian” and then, “Think about it, Elise.”

Think about it? Would I be able to stop thinking about it? I could already feel an obsession forming.

We grinned like idiots, then went our separate ways. As I loaded the groceries into the family SUV, I thought about what to say the next time I ran into him. I realized I had no idea of the lives of firefighters. What did they do when they weren’t fighting fires? Where did they stay?

I suddenly had a strong need to go to the supermarket more often. It was a week before I saw him again.

“Hey, how are you?” he said, as we stood looking over the tomatoes and other produce.

“Great,” I managed to blurt out. “You?”

“Better now,” he said, smiling that great smile of his.

I’ll spare you all the petty conversation we exchanged. Fast forward to later that day when we had agreed to meet at a town park, after we’d put away our respective groceries.

Our affair began in the woods of Shelton Park. It was an area that was off the beaten paths of the park, and especially during a weekday we were unlikely to run into anyone.

I had brought a picnic basket. We spread out the bedspread and sat down. I know we were both too nervous and shy to eat so I broke the ice by easing over to him, almost sitting in his lap. I said, “I have thought so much about this moment.”

“Me, too,” he said, but the words were swallowed up in the kissing that ensued and didn’t let up. Oh, and a lot of other stuff happened along with the kissing.

We were there for about an hour and a half. I really didn’t want to leave. If I could have put up a little shack above the bedspread I’d have stayed, preferably with Brian but even without him.

I have to admit I felt a lot of mixed emotions, one of them being a shred of guilt. I’d never cheated before, but mostly I just felt good, really happy and relaxed. We agreed that for the sake of our families (he isn’t married but has a girlfriend who has a kid who looks up to Brian as a father), we decided to space these meetings at least two weeks apart. I would have preferred one week, but hey, he was right to be cautious.

Two weeks later we had a repeat performance which was even more wonderful than the first time. After making love, we sat there snacking on some trail blaze mixture I’d brought. We discussed what we’d do when the weather got too cold for us to meet in the park, because even as we were cooling off from our passionate interlude, I could feel a chill in the air. We agreed we’d think of something.

Unfortunately, something happened which took precedence in my mind over where we’d next meet to have sex. After dinner one night, Bill, my husband, and I were lingering at the table. Shailey and Jared were giggling and hanging around, looking at their phones and just being obnoxious. Bill and I looked at each other and shrugged.

Usually they go to their respective rooms after dinner, or else go out to their friends who live nearby, but on this evening they, too, seemed to be lingering.

“Listen, you two,” I said, “I’m going to interpret you hanging around as a way of saying you want to help clean up. So, come on.”

“What?” Jared said, his voice cracking. “Hell, no.”

“That’s not why we’re hanging around,” Shailey said, making eyes at her brother.

Jared made a face back at her as if to say, shut up.

“It’s amazing what you can see on line these days,” Shailey said, staring at her phone as she danced around.

“All right, I’m going to do some work,” Bill said, and he was off to his workroom to play with tools.

“Mom…” Shailey started, but Jared grabbed her hand and said, “Mom, what she’s trying to say is we’re going out.”

“Did you do your homework?” I said as I began clearing the table.

In unison they said yes and made for the front door.

“Be back by nine, the latest,” I called after them.

I was glad to be alone so I could focus my thoughts on my lover, Brian. When I wasn’t with him, which of course was most of the time, he was all I could think about: his face, his hands, how it felt when he touched me, making love, each and every warm, sexy moment we were together played over and over in my head. I was so entranced that when Bill walked in and said my name, I dropped a glass which broke.

“Wow, sneak up on someone why don’t you?” I said.

“Sorry, hon, what were you so deep in thought about?” Bill said, standing next to me, looking into my eyes as if trying to read my mind.

“Oh, nothing, nothing very important, just daily stuff, you know, like what I have to do tomorrow, you know,” I said, suddenly becoming very interested in loading the dishwasher properly, with the dishes facing in the right direction and the silverware not nesting.

“You okay?” my husband said.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be? Are you okay?”

He nodded. “Yeah, but now I forgot what I came in to tell you.”

“I’m sure you’ll remember.”

“Yeah….”

He went to the refrigerator, took out a bottle of water, opened it and began drinking. Then he stopped. “Oh, yeah, I remember. Someone at work today said something that I don’t think I was supposed to hear. Believe it or not, it was about you.”

My blood ran cold. “Me? Why would anyone at your job say anything about me?”

Bill worked in an insurance office. I’d been there once and briefly met one or two of his co-workers, but that was it.

“Uh, something about seeing you in a video on line,” Bill said, looking at the floor.

“Oh, that’s crazy. How would I be in a video on line? What else…”

“They said you were with some guy who looked like a fireman. He had on fireman’s clothes.”

I put the soap in the dispenser and took my time pressing the dishwasher buttons. When it burped into action, I slowly looked up. “Well, it must have been someone who looks like me, because you know me, Bill. What would I be doing with a fireman?”

“Well, I sure as hell don’t know but it damn well better not have been you, or else…”

I was about to blurt out “Or else what?” Instead I just said, “Hey, don’t worry about it, okay? It was someone else. I’m pretty common-looking, don’t you think?”

In my head I was thinking, shit, you’d better not say yes.

Bill, shaking his head, said, “I’m gonna watch some TV. Coming?”

“No, honey, I feel more like going on the computer. In fact, what site did your guy at work say the video was on? Was it You Tube?”

“No, he didn’t say.”

***

Of course, I went right to my laptop and opened up You Tube. And sure enough, that insurance creep was right. There I was, walking along with Brian. I was horrified, praying to a god I don’t believe in that the video didn’t include us making love. But guess what. It did. Oh, my god. How could this happen? I hadn’t seen anyone around us. Of course we checked before we even sat down. Then again there were trees and shrubs so someone could have been hiding in them. We’re gonna have to stop meeting, the thought of which kills me. Or at least we’ll have to change where we meet.

We had plans to meet the following Tuesday afternoon close to the park entrance. I texted Brian and told him we could meet at the park entrance but then we had to figure out a different place to go. When he texted back, “Why?” I said I’d tell him when we met.

For the next few days until Tuesday I could barely function. Hardly eating and sleeping, I was so tense I felt about ready to snap. Seeing Brian couldn’t get here fast enough.

On Tuesday the weather was sort of rainy, drizzly, as we stood near the entrance of the park and I told him what had happened. He, of course, was as shocked as I was. I was dying to just snuggle up to him, under his big rubber jacket where I would feel safe and warm, not to mention turned on, but I stood there, thinking as we talked about how my hair would be as the drizzle wet it. Why I decided to walk there instead of taking my car I’ll never know, but it wasn’t the first dumb choice I’d ever made.

We decided to go to his fire house as he assured me no one else would be there. At least we could go there and get out of the rain. We decided to walk as it was within walking distance. I practically had to run, though, to keep up with him. When we finally got there, lo and behold, we weren’t alone. Two other fire fighters were there. Oh. My. Brian introduced me as his friend, and as I thought about how good looking and sexy both of them were, I felt kind of slutty. The word “Orgy” flew through my brain. I realized I needed to get out of there fast before I did something I’d really regret.

Leaving those three sexy men was not easy. And Brian and I hadn’t solved our problem, which, when I got home was bigger than I had realized. This time it was at dinner that the kids started cracking up, casting continual glances at their phones which they’re not even supposed to have at the dinner table. The air was very tense as we ate chicken kiev, so I finally said, “Okay, will one of you tell me what’s going on?”

Laughing, and blushing, Jared said, “It’s you, Mom. You’ve gone viral. You and the fire fighter.”

I jumped up. “Give me that phone!”

Bill just sat there looking at his uneaten broccoli, turning red. I took the phone and sure enough, once again, there were me and Brian, first at the park, then at the fire house. How was this happening? Then I had a thought. I texted Brian, “Are you making these videos of us?” Immediately, he texted back, “NO WAY!” like that, in upper case letters. How else were they made? I certainly wasn’t doing it.

It was anyone with a cell phone. Which included just about everyone.

“Bill, it’s not what you think,” I said, taking a chance on him not having seen the juicy part which my son swore to me he’d gotten rid of.

Getting into bed that night was so awkward. Bill had his light off, and pretended to be asleep, for which I was glad. As I got into my nightgown, with hands trembling I pulled it down over my head, knocking off my glasses. Oh, just what I need, no glasses. I picked them up and fixed the lens that was about to pop out of the frame, laid them on the night table, and got into bed.

***

Waking the next morning, I felt a stone of dread in my gut. I would have to break it off with my lover. I got dressed in a pair of jeans and a tee and went down to get a cup of coffee. Bill, happily enough, had left early, without even saying good morning. Jared was sitting at the table grinning at me.

“What’d you do, Mom? It’s gone.”

I poured a mug of coffee and sat. “What are you talking about? I didn’t do anything.”

Shailey spoke up. “The videos are gone, Mom. Good work,” she said, not without a trace of sarcasm.

I shrugged. “See? It really was nothing. Just some pictures someone put together to cause trouble for me.”

“Why would anyone want to do that?” Shailey said, finishing her cereal.

“Who knows. People are crazy these days, you know?”

After the kids left for school, I went back up to the bedroom to get my purse. Looking through it to make sure I had what I needed, out of the corner of my eye I saw something shining on the floor. Picking it up, I tried to figure out what it was. It was tiny, round and shiny, and would blink every two seconds. I put it in my purse, thinking I’d ask Jared later as he was up on new tech stuff.

As difficult as it was, I refrained from texting Brian. For the sake of my family, I had to give it a rest. But later, when the kids came home, they were once again all atwitter, looking at their phones.

“What is it now?” I said, exasperated.

“It looks like the inside of a purse, you know, a wallet, lipstick, mints, tissues…” Jared said.

“Oh, that must make for fascinating watching,” I said. And then it hit me. The little shiny thing I’d picked up off the floor and put in my purse. It must be a camera.

“Did you put it on me?” I asked them.

“What? No!” they both exclaimed.

Then I realized how I’d been videoed. Someone – who? – had stuck this tiny camera onto my glasses so whether the glasses were on or off, the camera videoed everything. Even when Brian and I made love, I had taken them off and laid them next to us. The question that needed answering was who had done this? Bill? Maybe he’d suspected me of having an affair. The kids, for a laugh?

But then I knew. It was actually me. I’d done it, thinking the camera was a little bauble like the other ones on my glasses frame. I’d seen it on my night table and stuck it on my glasses, but then when I dropped the glasses it came off. I had gotten it originally to keep an eye on Jared who I thought might be using drugs, but obviously the plan had backfired when I got involved with the fire fighter. Oh, stupid, stupid me.