It was a long time since Dave and his dad had gone into Dave’s grandma’s attic. The last time Dave went up there he was young enough to believe the lies his older brother told him, like there was a ghost living in his grandma’s attic. That one really scared him. He didn’t dare go in her attic for years after that, but now he’d long grown out of those silly fears. He was now old enough to help his dad with groceries. And that meant it was time to go to grandma’s house, which meant going to the attic again.
Climbing up the stairs, Dave found piles of old things, some of which he guessed would be now worth millions. But of course he had no intention to sell one of his grandma’s prized possessions. His eyes wandered around the musty and dust filled attic and locked on an old box, the one that he’d first thought was treasure chest he’d never actually opened it. So his curious mind told him to open it. So he did.
When he opened it, he found the remnants of his grandmothers childhood, a gold ring encrusted with assorted diamonds and jewels that her dad had given to her. He was surprised that it still held its glimmer, a yellowed picture of the family and a dusty, red ball that she probably played with as a child.
From the top of the stairs he heard the family laughing and eating. “Oh gosh I’m missing out! I should go join them!”Dave thought. He slid down the banister and tried to hop off suavely, but tripped on his shoelace and bumped his head on the dining table. “DAVE ARE YOU OKAY??”
His mother exclaimed. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Dave said as if he meant to fall the whole way along. “Oh phew! I thought you were hurt!” his mother said now much more relieved that her son was not hurt.
“Hey grandma. I found a chest full of stuff in the attic can you explain what it is?” Dave questioned. his grandma said “yes, I sure can. That was my special box. I would put things that were special to me in it. It was so full that I needed six of those chests to hold all my special items."
His grandma sighed, took a long deep breath and continued "but alas. This is where the bad part begins. This is where we moved to Indiana where we live now. There was not enough room in our cramped car for lots of things, especially my special chests. I had to toss them. Then special chests became a special chest”. “So you are saying that all those things that where important to you are in some California landfill?” Dave screamed. “Calm down Dave. Calm down. Yes, I did throw those important things in the trash. But if I didn’t then, I would not have met your grandpa and gave birth to your mother. Without your her, you wouldn’t have been born. Think about that. While you are at it, think about this: at least we have one.” Grandma said. Dave was calmer and said “okay.”
Later that day, they had a delicious dinner and a chocolate mousse as dessert. When it started getting dark and Dave knew it was time to go home. He didn’t want to go but he knew he had to.
The next day Dave thought about making a special chest for himself thinking “that would be fun! And we aren’t gonna move soon and if we do our car is big enough!” So he did. He started by finding a suitable chest. He went to the village store as it had some vintage items. There he found two beautiful cedar chests with brass locks. He immediately bought the two. Then he started with the special things.
First he looked in the basement and found his childhood remains, a baby walker that was colorful but now faded, old, cracked building blocks of assorted shapes and sizes and much more. Dave ran back the stairs from the basement, carefully picked up one of the chests and much more tenderly walked down the stairs.
At the bottom he mindfully piled the items in to the chest. Then he walked back up the stairs and put the chest in a closet. Then gathered things from his room that were important to him, some foreign currency from China, Europe, India and much more, a gold necklace encrusted in ruby handed do to Dave by his great great great grandfather and a vintage recorder.
He put all these items into his other chest and put that in the closet too. Then locked it again. The next day Dave went to school. He did the usual: putting his textbooks and clothing in his locker, then going to his class.
At recess, Dave noticed that Bill who usually bullied him was looking down and no one was playing with him. Being a kind person, Dave went over and asked Bill if he needed any help.
Bill said “go away!” Without the courage to stand up to his former bully, Dave walked away and looking for someone else to play with.
Not walking too far, he heard Bill shout behind “hey, come back!”
Dave returned to Bill.
Bill explained, “actually, I am wondering if I don’t have to punch people to get money, because when adults know I do such a thing to get my dough, they don’t let me spend it.
For example, I went to the village shop the other day and to try to get a video game console. The store owner being one of the teachers at our school knew how I got my money. Instead of getting a video game console, I got to sent to my parent. If I have a better way to earn money, I can use it the way I want.”
Dave was shocked. He never imagined these thoughtful words could come out of Bill’s mouth. Being afraid of what Bill had done to him in the past, Dave almost turned around and walked away. But he smashed his fearful thoughts, thinking if I don’t let him change, he will never change. He looked into Bill’s eyes with a big grin, and asked “how can I help?” Then like a contagious disease Bill grinned right back and exclaimed “lets do this!” The bell rang and they walked together, hand in hand into the school.
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1 comment
This was an interesting read. I enjoyed it for sure. My critique is as follows: -there were some grammatical errors -In conversation between characters, the writer identified each character by name each time one of them spoke. The reader doesn't have to be reminded of who is saying what in a conversation between two characters -the ending was a bit confusing and seemed awkward, I couldn't figure out how Bill the bully fit into the story -over use of adjectives and adverbs
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