Voices of the Mind Connected by the Heart

I'm not good enough for anyone, no matter what I do. I wasn't even good enough for my mother to keep, which is why she left me at the hospital the day I was born. Not even an hour after they removed me from her stomach and carried me away, she decided that it was the best time to escape. Escape the burden of such a mistake that was me. She didn't even bother to give me a name. I swear, I wish I had never been born. I don't want to be here anymore.

"No don't leave." a voice said.

"Who said that?" she asked aloud while looking under and around the jackets and other clothes that belonged to her and the other children of the orphanage.

"Me, Thomas, please don't leave me here alone?" said Thomas almost pleading.

"Where are you?" she asked in her head this time since she realized she was alone.

"I'm in my room. Where are you?" he responded.

"I'm in my closet. How can I hear you?" she asked in her head while still questioning how she could talk to someone in her head.

"I don't know, but I've heard you for a while now. You never heard me until now though. I thought you were an imaginary friend, but even after I understood that they weren't real, I still heard you?" he told her, still questioning if his own words were true.

"How old are you? she asked him.

"I'm 9 years old, but you just turned 8 last month, didn't you?" he said while trying to remember when it was that she scared him because she screamed with excitement.

"You were there for my birthday?" she asked surprised.

"No, but I heard how excited you were when your friend brought you a cupcake with a candle. I think that every time you feel something really strong, like with all your might, or something, is when I could hear you," he said, still unsure of the reasons himself.

"Were you there when that man came into my room that night?" she asked with a shaking voice as if she were trying to force out the words.

(It became silent for a moment within their minds as the different memories of what happened brought chills and fear between them)

"I cried and ran to my mom for help,\ because you couldn't hear my screams. She told me I was just having nightmares. Now, I wish I was." his voice was a mix between sadness and anger.

"You tried to save me?" she didn't mean to ask so cheerfully.

"Can you tell me your name, please." he had grown tired of calling her the girl in my head.

"Jessica," she answered shyly.

"Well, Jessica, I probably could count on both hands how many times I tried to be there for you. I really wish I had teleportation powers so that I could be there to wipe your tears away. Now that you can hear me, you can talk to me anytime you need to. You're not alone." he said trying to assure her.

"Really," Jessica asked with excitement.

"Really," Thomas answered with confidence.

"Thank you, Thomas."

"You're welcome, Jessica."

................................................................................................................................

(10 years later)

"Thomas, are you there!? Thomas!? I have to tell you something." Jessica was so eager to talk to him that he couldn't ignore her if he wanted to.

"If it's about how handsome Mathew would look on your wedding day, I actually am going to puke this time." Thomas was past annoyed by her high school musical romance. He hated musicals.

"No, although he would look amazing, it's about my letter from Madison Law School," she answered with a tease.

"Did you get it?! Please tell me you got in! No, I know you got in!" he couldn't contain his excitement. They'd been waiting 3 months to know if she got into her dream top law school.

"Pipe down, I haven't even opened the letter yet. I wanted to make sure you were here when I did," she said with sincerity.

"Ahh, how sweet, although I'm technically not there." he was joking of course, but a huge part of him wished that he wasn't.

"You've always been here, Thomas," she said, then they went quiet for a moment.

"So have you, Jessica. Now, open the damn thing so that I can laugh when you get drunk from celebrating tonight with Sam, Catty, and Mendy." he chuckled at the memory of her so drunk that she was talking to him in her head and out loud, in public. Mindy was no better because she answered as if Jessica was talking to her.

"Come on. That was one night of losing self-control. Let it go already." she was slightly annoyed.

(Jessica rips the envelope open)

"You got it right! I can feel your excitement you know," he said as a wave of emotions, that weren't his, came roaring in. Their telepathic waves of emotions had grown stronger over the years and both had mastered identifying when their feelings were their own or each other's emotions.

"Yes! Yes! Yes! I got in!" she shouted while jumping up and down in her adoptive parent's bedroom above the downstairs living room. Her mom had sat her main on the dresser after checking it earlier and was waiting eagerly for the good news downstairs.

"Hell's yeah! I knew you would. You're so smart and they would be lucky to have you." a heartwarming feeling came with his words that Jessica hugged internally.

"Thanks, Thomas."

"No problem, Jessica."

................................................................................................................................

(30 years later)

It had been almost a year since Thomas last heard anything from Jessica. She'd become a successful lawyer, taking on tough cases that had her overwhelmed, but after she took on meditation and therapy, she gained control over her emotions. This lessened their sporadic conversations over the years, but their desire to speak to one another was strong enough to reach. Thomas had become a Physician/Surgeon and was over the anxiety attacks before performing surgeries. Now, he could probably do one with his eyes closed, of course, he never would though. He was the kind of medical professional who put his patient's comfort over the dollar comfort which made him favorable to the patients of the female gender, if you know what I mean.

Finding a lovely lady to date was never an issue, but actually keeping a partner was difficult for him. Aside from his hectic and demanding schedule, he would always have a hard time explaining to his partners who Jessica was when things were becoming serious. He had completely given up on trying after the last one attempted to claim he was insane and not fit to do his job. A costly scandal that almost robbed him of everything he'd worked so hard for just because the woman believed that he was cheating on her with a ghost.

Now, he misses Jessica dearly on the nights when he feels most alone. It took him most of this past year to adjust to the silence he experienced in quiet rooms and the emptiness of feeling only his emotions. He longed to feel her excitement and joy, like when she walked across the stage with her Doctrine or solved a cold case that had been dormant for years.

"I miss you," he said to himself as he sat on the edge of his bed in a house that never felt empty until recently. He then got comfortable into his pillows before dosing off while he talked to her as if she was right next to him.

When morning came, Thomas woke up and began his morning routine before heading to the hospital. He had many procedures lined up for the day, after temporarily taking another doctor's caseload and did his best to ensure that the families of his patients were assured of their loved one's safe return to them. One by one, he performed the surgery, went through the protocol for the procedures, and made sure to visit them once they were admitted into a room for an overnight stay.

After a long day with success and no casualties, he made a few last-minute documentation to a patient's profile and headed into their room as he did for all the others. However, although this particular patient had a successful surgery, it didn't change the outcome of their condition.

"Hello, how are you feeling," he said with a welcoming smile after knocking on the door to ensure he was indeed welcomed in. He'd learned the hard way not to just barge in on people and it left a mental scar with a horrid image.

"I'm feeling a bit dizzy still, but ok I guess." answered the patient as she sat up in the hospital bed to address him properly.

"That's good. Are you eating well?" he asked as he tried to keep her spirits high before giving the bad news that was soon to follow.

"Cut to the chase Doc. You know that this was my last shot." the patient snapped, but he was prepared for this.

"Ok. We were able to remove most of the tumor shown in your cat scan as discussed, but we found an even larger mass behind it. It's affecting a part of your brain that tampers with you Nero links to your moods and emotions." he cut right to the chase as demanded.

"So that's why I can't hear him." the patient said under her breath.

"Excuse me?" he asked, curious as to what he had just heard.

"Never mind that doc. So what's my timeline looking like now?" she tried to change the subject and kept a straight face the whole way through.

"Um, to put it plainly, not good Ms. Jennings." he tried to sound sympathetic despite her attitude since it was out of her control in a way.

"Will I ever feel anything again?" she asked with concern and longing.

Thomas walked over to his patient, placing his hand over her shoulder to give comfort in such a hard time. After viewing her profile, he noticed she had no relatives and, it seemed, no friends either. No one had picked her up from previous procedures and she usually drove herself to and from her appointment. Dr. Tallman had been taking care of her and briefed him before going on his yearly vacation with his family since he was covering his patients for him. He couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

"It's going to be ok," he said in his head before he could get out the words because he understood the hollowness of them.

"How do you know that?" she answered in her head without looking his way.

"Did you say that with your mouth or your mind?" he asked, still speaking in his head with his hand on her shoulder.

"You read my thoughts?" she asked after realizing he was not actually talking.

"Wait you can hear me?" he asked her as he realized the same.

"Yes I can., Thomas, is that really you?" she asked this with her verbal voice and her pleading heart.

A wave of emotions settled in between the two that was strong enough to fill the whole room. The familiar voice touched his heart in a way that warmed him inside out. Jessica felt this warmth too, for the first time in a year, she felt something and she was overjoyed that it was him. Tears began to welp in both of their eyes as they realized the reality of the situation as well as the loneliness the other felt in their absence.

"I remember you," said Jessica as she whipped a tear from his eye before it passed his cheek.

"I remember you," said Thomas as he whipped the tears from both her eyes, embracing her face and then her for the first time.