Just There

The last thing she remembered was sitting on her sofa, phone in hand, texting. She had been in a fight with her boyfriend; Jason had been angry with her for missing his football match, she wanted to go but had an interview for a new job. She always wanted to work at the fashion designers and had finally got a shot, but it would have been so much easier if she had just missed the interview. She was also texting her friend Ben; he was telling her that she deserved much better than Jason, that she deserved someone like him. Ben was a good guy, but he was a gamer, and she didn’t want to sit all day and play video games with him. Should she just deal with it for a better boyfriend? Another conversation ran alongside these, one with her ex-boyfriend, Fred, he had been a perfect guy: funny, sweet, generous and had taken her to the fanciest restaurants, but he had cheated on her. She found him one day in his apartment with another girl in the shower. He texted her saying he was sorry and couldn’t find anyone who clicked the way she had done. Should she forgive him to have her old, happy life back?

Cathy woke. Her head was laid gently on a hard rock in the middle of a torch lit corridor. The floor was slimy beneath her soft fingertips and cold as the dead. The warm yellow light from the burning wood cascaded down the walls and lit up the entire tunnel, it was perfectly carved, it was stripped of all colour, and it was endless. She was very confused about how she had found herself in here. Had she been kidnapped? Standing up, she brushed the rubble from her silk pyjamas she had changed into before sitting down to watch TV, bright pink with little frills around the edges. She needed to find a way out. Quickly. Before anyone worried about her being gone.

Cathy tiptoed down the corridor. The smell of damp fabric and the windless cold made it seem as though she were deep underground or in an old cave, but she still soldiered on to find where the tunnel led. After 10 minutes she found a large carving in the wall, the shape of a door. Pressing fiercely on it she tried to push it out of the way, until she noticed small writing on the frame.

“take into account what we must say but never stray from your own way”

As the last syllable fled her lips the door cracked open, and a passageway was reviled. It was dark, but it must be the correct way. It was definitely the easiest. Cathy stepped over the barrier between the corridor and room, and she felt a rush of air hit her and as she looked down she was wearing a white blouse, grey trousers, and an ugly purple necktie. Infront of her was a desk, piled high with papers, folders, and leaflets. She sat down on the hard, metal chair and began to look through the documents:

“DO THE DISHES WHEN YOU GET HOME”

“MAKE THE PACKED LUNCH  BOXES AND TAKE THE KIDS TO SCHOOL”

“PAY THE ENERGY BILL”

As she rushed through every sheet of paper, all she could see was job upon job that she must do. But she didn’t have any kids? She didn’t pay the bills? Who could this be for? After the long tiresome work of trying to sort through all the papers she finally say another door open up across the room. Finally. Cathy stepped into the newly crafted room, and she felt the same gush of air across her cheek. She was now in a kitchen and there was a glorious feast on the table. Stretching her hand out for a beautifully crisp Danish pastry she noticed a pair of eyes in the corner of the room watching her. A hideous beast arose from the shadows and lunged at her. “you don’t get food until you have done the work!” it screeched. Cathy fell back against the wall, which was no longer there, and she found herself back in the corridor in front of the once again closed door. Relief spreading over her, Cathy continued down the corridor determined to find her way out.

About half an hour later she found another carving in the wall, this time reading:

“if it is a game then only one can win”

Not understanding what the statement meant she walked through the opened passageway and was greeted again by the cold rush. Feeling her body become constricted, Cathy looked down to find herself in a latex suit with a gun in her hand. That would have been useful about half an hour ago she thought to herself.  Above her head was a beautiful shining heart with the number 3 written across it. 3. 3 what? She wondered. Suddenly, a red dart came flying at her and pierced her heart and it cracked in two. From her chest she felt an aching pain which more than anything made her sad. Then swiftly it was gone, and her heart read 2. So this was a game. That’s what the statement meant. She needed to win the game to leave the maze. Easy.

From two corners of the room came two groups of people. One group had around 30 members with guns in hands and masks over their faces and the other consisted of 3 men with sticks. That was the first simple choice. 3 men is much easier to handle than 30, so the easiest option was to run at the 3 men. As she galloped through the hall, the men came into a clearer view. They weren’t sticks. They were staffs… magic staffs. Before Cathy could turn around, all 3 staffs pointed at her and thousands of bullets came shooting towards her and she found herself crawled in a ball in the middle of the corridor once more.

Cathy had enough now. She just wanted to be in the comfort of her own home, to feel safe, to feel free and happy. To have her normal life back. And with that another door opened up a few hundred metres away.

“when one fails you don’t take another step back”

As she stepped into through the door she saw through the room was the doorway that lead to her bedroom. She was almost home. Her foot plodded onto the first tile on the floor, and some fell away into the black abyss she hadn’t noticed below. Carefully she tried to navigate which tiles would hold under the weight of her body and slowly she made her way to the middle of the room. All the tiles in front of her fell away. She was stuck. She had no where to go. The only tile left was the one behind her. She had to get back to safe ground, even if it was back in the hallway. So, she stepped onto the tile she previously had found to be the right one, but it gave way underneath her feet, and she fell deep down.

Cathy woke. She was in the hallway once more. How could a tile that was once good be a faulty one now? She pondered as she sat on the floor.  Three more doors opened up around her. But Cathy didn’t take any notice. All that the doors did was cause trouble. All the doors did was disappoint her. All the doors did was hurt her. Then it clicked. These were not only doors. These were pathways she could take; these were her options. She could quite her dream and stay with Jason and become a housewife. She could put up with Ben’s video games and learn to love them. Or she could go back to Fred and forgive him to get her old life back.

Cathy knew her decision. All these pathways leading off of the hallway had led to her getting hurt. All these options she had were leading away from her path. She wanted to live her own life and build her own corridor through the world. So, with the intent of not opening another door, she walked forward and step by step she felt herself leaving. Leaving the maze and becoming lighter.

Cathy woke. She was lying on her sofa. She had been asleep. Her phone was still in her hand and text messages were pinging in. But she knew what to do now.

Love is a game. So, only one person can win. But Cathy knew that she couldn’t win in this situation. So she left. Because when you leave a game, you don’t appear on the score board, you are neither a loser or a winner. You are just there. And Cathy was happy just being there.