Thank You for Being You, Ana Wilmer

Dear Anastasia Wilmer,

I know you probably hear this a lot, but I am your number one fan. I own every one of your books. Actually, I have 2 copies of “Love on the Plateau's Horizon” since my Mom threw my first out into a pile of mud. I even have your poem and short story anthologies. You may be surprised to know that I even listened to the album you put out when you were nineteen. I heard about it from your Wiki page. It was beautiful.

Sometimes your art is the only comfort I can find. I mean it when I say that you saved my life. Thank you so much for being you.

Sincerely,

Robin

* * *

Dear Anastasia Wilmer,

I don’t know if you read my letter before but that’s okay. I know you probably have a lot of fan mail, and you are too busy writing books to read it all. That’s okay.

I just finished reading your most recent book “The Duchess’ Dowry” and it was amazing! I had it pre-ordered and read it all on the day it was released.

Your stories are my only escape. My Mom goes on shouting tirades, so I lock my door and read and I can almost not hear her. My Dad tells me he is fed up with her antics.

I’m glad I still have you.

Sincerely,

Robin

* * *

Dear Ana Wilmer,

Sorry for writing this on such ugly paper. I had to dig through the trash for something blank to write on. These past months have been hard because my Mom kicked me out. Since Dad left she said she couldn’t afford for me to live there anymore and made me leave. I packed two bags with your books, music, my money, and whatever else I needed. My shoulders hurt carrying around all this stuff.

I travel a lot now. The only constant in my life now is my shoulder pain and the internet. I go to libraries and browse forums. Mostly ones about romance books; I like going on threads that talk about you.

I’ve heard rumors of an exclusive site that only your biggest fans are invited to join. Do you know anything about this? They should invite me.

Your #1 Fan,

Robin

* * *

Dear Ana Wilmer,

I know you don’t keep up with fan mail, and like I said, that’s okay. That secret website I told you about, I got invited to it. They really are true fans of you. I’m glad to have found like-minded individuals, people who appreciate you as much as I do.

I spent a lot of time getting to your hometown. Your house is stunning. It may be silly considering how my life is now, but I would love to live in a big fancy house like yours someday. You sure do have a lot of security guards. Do you think someone might hurt you?

Love,

Robin

* * *

Ana Wilmer,

Excuse my language, but I've come to despise your security guards. Believe me when I say I desperately want to see you in person. I want to tell you how much you mean to me. You haven’t been reading my letters, that is not at all your fault. You’re just so amazing, you have so many fans, I’m only a minnow in an ocean of plankton.

When I told them I had to speak with you, they told me I had to leave. I insisted but they refused to let me see you. They threatened to call the police on me when I did nothing wrong. You should hire someone else because they clearly cannot do their job.

Anastasia, I wish you could meet me or at least read my letters. You’re so close but so far away.

Love,

Robin

* * *

Dear Ana Wilmer,

It may not be as fancy as your home, but I finally have one of my own. 

I met a man named Sveinn, by his wild appearance I thought he must be in a situation like mine. To my surprise, he told me he was living in a two-bedroom home free of charge and had me follow him.

Though the roof was partially collapsed, there was a cellar with a firm door and padlock to it. I want to put my books of yours down there where they will be safe. Nobody would be able to steal them because I would be the only one with a key.

Sveinn and I talked all night getting to know each other. I told him about how I loved your books and to my surprise he had heard of you. He used to read a lot of romance books before his vision got too bad for it, and he had gone through a couple of yours.

Sveinn told me he was “a believer in true love.” I thought that was beautiful. 

I believe in true love. Do you?

Robin

* * *

Ana,

It was wonderful to finally meet you! To shake your hand in person and see you smile when you saw me. I could hardly believe that you signed every book I brought to you. It showed you truly cared.

I asked you if you read any of my letters, and told you my name was Robin Holty. You told me you get so many letters, it’s hard to keep track. I knew it. You'd never turn a blind eye to someone in need.

Now that you know who I am, I want to assure you that Sveinn, the man you saw me with, is not the love of my life. No one compares to you Ana. That’s why I’ve sent you so many letters. Why my back is sore from carrying your books around with me. Bringing you food from your favorite restaurant. Everything I’ve done is for you.

Nothing is more painful than seeing you mad at me.

Love,

Robin

* * *

Ana, you need to listen to me.

Attacking Sveinn, my best friend who has helped me so much, was one thing. But the incessant screaming is going to get us into trouble if you don’t quit. You’re lucky we live in a reclusive area, but sometimes high school kids like to come graffiti over here. Some came into the house while we were cooking. They asked us why you were yelling and we had to lie. We told them you were having drug withdrawals and it was safer for you to be alone. I’m not sure they believed us.

Sveinn and I do so much. We feed you, we bring you clean clothes, we even brought you a bucket of water to bathe with and you don’t care. You are going to ruin it all.

Just stop screaming. Stop crying.

* * *

Dear Anastasia Wilmer,

It’s Robin.

How could you kill Sveinn like that? How could you leave me when you know I love you? 

Since you’ve disappeared, I know it’s only a matter of time until you’re bad-mouthing me to the cops. I did nothing wrong and you’ve treated me unfairly. Why would you smile at me, sign all my books of yours, and be the beacon of my life only to spit in my face?

Don’t bother telling the cops about the house. All that’s left of me there will be this letter. It seems I’m back to where I started, a lonesome wanderer with nothing but your books on my spine. I’m sorry we couldn’t work things out.

Sincerely,

Robin.

* * *

Dear Anastasia Wilmer,

It’s been a while since I’ve written you a letter but this will be the last one, I promise. When you see what I’ve done you’ll know I’ve already kept it.

I’ve been watching the news whenever I can. Our story is all over it. You’re on all the big talk shows, in all the big papers. When I see the tears in your eyes, mine get that way too. I read the scrolling text on the news. “Author Kidnapped by Crazed Fan” I wouldn’t call what I did kidnapping, although, I don’t exactly know what I would call it.

What bothered me the most about all this was the fact they had tracked down and interviewed my Mom. She told them that she always knew I would end up like this. I’m not sure how she could have when I had never even noticed it within myself.

Anyways, I’m running out of time now. Even without the live broadcast of the manhunt on TV, I'd already known the police were here. There is a flashing red and blue outside my hotel window. The last thing I want to do is thank you for being you, Ana Wilmer. You brought joy to my life the way no one else could. I’m glad I got to know you.

Goodbye,

Robin