I knew at that moment.
It was devastating. Life-changing. heartbreaking. My Domino's pizza was late- and I thought Doordash was supposed to be quick and easy like in the commercials. I had learned over the years that commercials were a big fat lie. The perfectly combed hair, the "limited time discounts" that were only supposed to last a day but end up on your TV for months, the fake smiles- I mean who would be happy about cleaning someone's attic as a side-job? No one. Everything on TV is a lie really- you need to watch out. Almost everything on social media is a lie too. Well, everything except the cute puppy videos on youtube. But even those have fake thumbnails that lure you into the video.
You might be thinking that I am a pessimist, and maybe I am, people. But personally, I say a pessimist is not only a negative, adversarial, unhospitable snob. They have good qualities, and really they are only pointing out bad things or in case they happen. Who knows, maybe I'm wrong. But I'm almost never wrong. You also might be thinking, "I would not want to be this guy's friend!" well, you are right. I have anger issues. JK, but still. I criticize EVERYTHING. haha.
ding dong! Welp, that was probably the pizza. FINALLY. But no. Another annoying thing in life appeared when I opened the door. "Hi! My name is Sarah, and I was wondering if you, kind sir, would like to join our service community at Winston Baptist Church! Our main goal here in NC is-" Ugh. Whatever. I shut the door on her, but what's the harm? It's not like she'll call the police. Or something. I watched out the window as Sarah frowned at my front door and spitefully hung a little card around the doorknob before walking off the porch in her sun-yellow high heels. I smirked, but a weird feeling in me said I should get the little card off the doorknob. I fought against the feeling but found myself holding the paper thoughtfully on the porch. A huge picture of a cross was laid across the front, with big lettering above saying: JESUS DIED FOR YOU! Why would a man die for me? What did I ever do? Maybe this was just another one of those stupid lies. But something else told me it was not.
I brought the card into the house and placed it on the fridge for safekeeping. Not like I would ever go to the Winston church or whatever, but I liked having the paper on the fridge to look at. Hehe. Someone died for me! And NOT YOU! I'm special. I already knew that but the card is just a bonus. This Jesus guy must kinda be like me, Loyal to only a few people, negative, down-to-earth. The doorbell rang again and I picked up the pizza box off the ground, not bothering to leave a tip. I sat down in my favorite leather chair and retrieved my favorite horror book. I had a pile of them stacked on the side table because the only thing that kept me from criticizing non-stop every day is reading a good book. I've been able to read since I was in Kindergarten and the harry potter series since second grade. I slowly munched on the floppy slice of pizza and enjoyed the horror stories until the clock reached 10:00 and I went upstairs to go to sleep; but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get the thought of the cross off my mind.
I woke up the next morning at 7:30 and heard a car outside the house. I immediately hopped out of bed and put on my robe, fearing this was some burglar trying to break in or a spectrum mobile guy trying to solicit- but when I went outside all that was left was a care basket filled with candy and a small brown book- with the same looking cross as the card on the front! I eagerly picked up the basket and opened it in my leather chair, excited to eat some of the candy inside. petite little ribbons fluttered on the handles of the basket, but I ignored them and ripped open the Hersheys chocolate bar. Once I was done relishing the chocolate, I picked up the book. It felt heavy and promising in my hands, and I have to admit, I enjoyed having a new potential horror book. But as I flipped through the pages, there were no pictures or frightening words. I read a couple pages and finally found something interesting. Spirit! The word Spirit! But what came before always was the word holy. No spirits I had ever read about were holy. This was getting good! I went to the start of the chapter and started reading.
At the end of the story, I felt new. I couldn't find anything wrong with the story, and I felt like it kinda related to me, for the passage was about a man named Saul who wanted to kill others, and he was negative and mean. But then a voice spoke to him and changed his life. He even changed his name to paul and started sharing his story with others. Maybe I could change. Maybe I didn't always have to be so mean and grouchy. Maybe I could be something like what was in this book: a Christian.
I went back to the card and decided I would go to church, maybe the people there wouldn't welcome me because they had been saved, but the more I read the little brown book, the more I felt like I could fit in too. I hoped into my car and followed the directions to find the church was closer than I thought. I had been ignoring this building all my life, never to know what good things can come from the Jesus guy. I parked and walked into the church, and I wasn't ignored or frowned at like usual, I was greeted with smiles and welcomes! I finally felt loved in this place called "church."
Maybe not all puppy video thumbnails are a lie.