When Noah was here

I have known Noah for a long time. Since we were kids he already have that "I'm-An-Introvert-So-Scram!" waving flag on his head.

We actaully met on a scarlet sunset by the swing. I was reading a book I found in the playground earlier when he suddenly approached me saying that he wanted the book back. I didn't gave it to him because I haven't finished reading it.

He snickered at me and it turned to bickering, then into a soil fight that resulted of a wailing Noah, who looks like an idiot losing to a girl.

I gave the book to him and he started to calm down, he hugged the book and left. I stood by the swing for another minute when Noah came back running towards me and gave me the book telling that I should read it. Which I quickly accepted and it turns out Noah would be the greatest impact who made me who I am today.

"You know you really did outdone yourself this time."

He exclaimed with an out going smug face look, "But Becky, why do you write too many mystery novels, can you do something soft or romantic, you are a girl for the angel's sake, be soft." He added as he comb my hair using his scarred hands. Noah's been doing archery and been overpracticing himself and it worries me.

"Don't you think you're over offering your self to me. Use the damn comb. Don't hurt yourself." I told him but I got kisses on my neck as a reply. I gasped as he continued to drop kisses to my shoulders and whispered "Yes my sweet writer, my sweet sweet Rebecca."

When we grow up, girls flocked around Noah but he stick with me , which I find irritating. I got bullied because of him and even made as an out cast by the whole class.

They actually told me how I was a bitch for seducing him and leading Noah to the bad path. Those we're the bad things and there were actually no good things about backstabbing.

"Rebecca, I'm sorry if I put you through this. I promised I won't let anyone hurt you again." He cried at the hospital. In his perspective I look helpless with a dextrose.

Though I laughed it out when I remembered that I was pushed and fell from the stairs. He taught that I broke my wrist and stormed out of the room. He went back to the school and gave a piece of his mind at the broadcasting room. Everyone heard it and everyone knows who was it.

After that, it became quiet. I am still treated as an outcast but atleast no one dares to hurt me or bully me, just the momentary gossips ans jeering. But it was quiet and I love it.

Noah did outdone himself on protecting me and I felt lucky for having him. Though I don't know if Noah worries about me or he worries about how I can't write? Eitherway, I am still lucky.

"Noah, what sex positions that works best in this?" I nonchalantly asked him at the cafeteria. He turned beet red and was telling me to keep my voice low. "I want to include it to the story, I just want to know if there are any positions convenient on this?" he snorted as he laugh as I was naively ask him.

People adored Noah for being diligent and responsible, on the other hand, I was stuck on reading that I sometimes forgot about the existing real world. Being an orphan makes you immune to being treated as non-existent. It turn out to be ordinary to me but Noah made me feel that I am existing. Noah lost his parents on an airplane crash leaving him and his rich coldhearted granpa that basically turned Noah as an orphan with unlimited credentials.

"I love you, Becky, stay here, we can be together, please stay," he said as he reach for my shirt and slid his hands underneath and cupped my skin. He kissed me gently then hungrily, like someone who wants to consume me inside. I respond with the same pace and letting my hand wander to his body. I gasped as our lips parted. He took off my shirt and gave me hot pecks on my collarbone. He leave marks all over my body, marking me, loving me, believing in me.

"Is it bad if I say that I don't want to live with you? I want to be with you, Noah, Yes, I really do. But as of now I want to know ME, more of me. Is it bad if I focus on writing, for now? Is it bad to pursue solace from my self?" I asked continuously and he heaved a sigh and hug me covering me with his scent, "If it's your choice Becky, I will respect it."

People thought Noah as an out-going guy because he was one of the cheerful and easy going adviser but he turns out to be the most introverted soft boy. He sometimes sneak or rejects parties, drink nights, even meet-ups. I even caught him sneaking out with a book everytime there was a family gathering. I really don't get how this guy's mind works but deliberately he just confidently do his thing. 

I sometimes loomed if he would do that if we would stay in one roof. Would he try to escape away from me? Then I noticed that Noah loved the silence between us, he loved the idea of the tranquility that courses between us and that comforted me.

In retrospect, he pushes me to be an occasional out-goer instead of writing all day long. Parties, contests, book signing or publishing, it was hectic honestly. Surprisingly tiring but doing it together with Noah made it little less a burden to me. I received awknowledgements and earned a name as an author, all thanks to the dreamy Noah who keeps on pushing me to be a writer.

One time he got from his work and was yelling "P-A-R-T-Y!~" . I was delighted that he initiated "Party" but alas, after bath, he took the new book that I bought and sat comfortably at his bed and read the entire series all night. Yes! Party it is! That's just how he is. 

"Beckyy, give me a snuggle, I miss you my sweet sweet Becky." he sang as he barge in my apartment after the field trip at the school he was teaching. I gave him a warm welcoming hug while he planted kisses to my head.

I decided to write a love story as requested by him. I find writing romance easy because I based the personality of the character to him. I fixed a decision that after I finished this book, I can let myself live with him. 

I got engage with writing. Too busy that I lose sleep. I rarely visit his place and when he does barge in my apartment, I neglected him that I didn't realized that the silence was suffocating him. I didn't mean to, I just got so absorbed at finishing the book that I sometimes forgot to eat.

I kept on writing holding to the idea that I can live with him after this.

We will be together.

This is my surprised for him.

A gift devotedly made just for him.

The romance book he was asking for. 

But I was wrong.

I received a call one evening, telling me to go to a hospital. When I arrived, I didn't made it in time. He got on a car accident, died even before I arrived.

Or, I think he died after I totally absorbed myself on writing and neglected him.

I didn't know if I cried.

But I went to his place and slept there.

I woke up covered by his clothes. I barely remember what happen last night. His room was a mess.

I guess, I berserk last night and made a pile of his clothes and created a bed out of it. It smelled like him.

I missed him.

I accidentally slipped over a tiny red box tucked on one of his shirt. I opened it and saw a ring with an attached note--

'For My Sweet Becky. She offer me a book, I offer her a ring.'

I didn't notice the tears were that warm as I whispered his name. 

I didn't know that love can bring so much pain. I didn't even have the chance to say goodbye.

After that day, I move to his place, the book I've been working, I don't think I can even look at it or read it but I can't bring myself to burn it, so I put it at the stack of books and left it. Unfinished. 

I continued to write. It was the path Noah had given to me.

And I write perfectly, I need to write it perfectly.

I don't know if I became numb but I craved to write perfectly. Well I got lost from time to time.

I made mishaps.

But Noah wouldn't mind, right?