A journal about Alice

London

September 9th 2014

Dear Diary,

<i> I saw it. Humans were hurting each other. Either bullying online or in school. They inflict pain on others and took pleasure in the horrified look on her faces. I knew why. Students seen as weak and trust easily, tell their deepest secrets, and then everything backfired on them. One morning, I heard some students gossiping about my friend, Lisa. I met her when I first started school. When I had nobody to show me around the school, Lisa offered and we became. She was smart, honest and sweet. She had a passion for being in a band someday. Her smile was beautiful and she helped others around her. 

Lisa told she began a band, but couldn't find a singer. I advised her to put flyers around the school, and someone would want to join eventually. I admitted that I had an argument with my best friend, Danny and how I found it frustrating he wouldn't listen to my advice about making the right friend. Lisa laughed and advised me to take it slow. She thought guys were complicated, jerks who cared about a girl's physical appearance rather than their heart. I agreed.

When she sang for the first time, I thought her voice was beautiful, but at the same time, it seemed sad. Her song was about friendship and bonds. Was she trying to send me a message?

Lisa came to my house at night, crying and soaked from the rain. She informed me that her friend Chris was acting strangely. She was bullied by the other girls physically. Like, throwing objects at her, hair pulling, drawing inappropriate stuff on her desk. Everyone took part in stealing her school equipment. The rumours about her, toying with guys feelings spread like wildfire.

September 11th

The next day, I saw something that I could never forget—Something that had stuck with me through every moment of my life. I saw Lisa, leering on a rooftop. I didn't question it. I knew what she was about to do. I rushed as fast as I could to the building and caught up to her. I begged her not to give up and stay strong but—

I saw her jump, but I couldn't watch her fall. I froze, turned my head away, and closed my eyes tighter than ever. I fell onto my knees and screamed. Every tear was marked with her memory. 

My dad and the rest of the police came to investigate the murder in the afternoon. They interrogated every student in the whole school and found nothing. So, they decided to close the crime scene. I knew my stupid dad gave up because he couldn't care less about my school life, and thought it was a just suicide. I vowed to avenge Lisa and find those jerks who hurt her. I saw a group of students, acting weird in her funeral. One of them was Chris, the boy Lisa hung out with before her death. </i>

***

Chris and the rest of his friends came to me and thought I could suffer the same fate as Lisa. A thought had hit me. What if I somehow masked myself? If I could fool them into thinking I was a clumsy girl who her kindness could get taken advantage of easily, then I could get them expelled. I told them everything, even how I could shoot fire out my hand and my dream job; Becoming an actress. 

For a moment, I wanted to give up. Maybe if Lisa were here, she wouldn't approve of me tricking others. But I shouldn't have doubted myself. In the gymnasium, I overheard Chris and his friends, planning to blame me for causing Lisa to jump off the rooftop. It was them! Chris and his friends made Lisa jump off the rooftop. I knew she wouldn't give up so easily. I wanted to get proof that he tried to frame me for Lisa's suicide, so I hid somewhere, grabbed my camera and recorded their whole conversation. Even though Chris was human—no a sick bastard, he'd thought of a backup plan to use against anyone who tried to expose him. So, I thought of Plan B.

Somehow, I had to play the cute and innocent girl to expose Chris and his buddies. But how? My English teacher, Mrs Morrision would believe me over them, the other teachers couldn't give a damn about me. When I was in a hurry to provide the evidence to the principal, one of Chris's lackeys, pushed me down the stairs and my camera broke. But there was hope. 

 I used my plan B, and it worked out. I couldn't believe it. Mrs Morrision backed me up because she thought of Lisa like a daughter. The bullies got expelled and my friend got justice. I never thought my plan would work out. If it wasn't for Mrs Morrison, Chris would have gotten away with his sin.

The next day, Lisa’s parents came to my house to thank me for being a great friend to Lisa. They didn't look good at all. Her father wanted to do whatever it took to get Chris expelled from school, her mother... she looked so sad that I wished I could’ve done better. What would have happened If I stopped Lisa from ending her life? Her parents reassured me that I did everything I could do help Lisa.

***

September 29th

A thought had occurred me. I recalled when Lisa first sang, it seemed very depressing. Maybe she was trying to send me a message after all. After I ate, I hurried to her house and checked her room. Lisa must write a note or something, informing people she would commit suicide. It turned out I was right. Her mother gave a letter and left the room, crying her eyes out.

She knew everyone hated her. She was planning this for the last three months. Lisa had an argument with Molly. She thought her life was cursed, but she was glad we met. Tears swelled down my cheeks as I took the letter and left her room.

***

January 20th 2015

My room

I learnt the truth about humans. If I thought of this plan earlier, then Lisa would've enjoyed the look on Chris's face when he got kicked out and the rest of his lackeys. It was my fault her loved ones were suffering,. I decided to hide my real personality behind a mask. I had to analyse people carefully. I watched their gestures (averting their eyes, mouth curving to a smile, anything suspicious and used that to my advantage, hurting them before they got a chance to hurt me. However, I couldn't tell anything about my true self to Danny. I didn't want him to hate me.

 Year 10 started, and my popularity was alive and well. My classmates and the teachers believed I was the cute and innocent girl from the last few months. They adored me and consoled me. Perfect! The second day, a transfer student called Mark asked me out. All I had to do was act innocent to fool him, then continue to mask myself till graduation. Easy right?