Sunglasses by Albert Zygier

Harry Baker was returning from his run through Central Park in New York. Still dressed in his running suit, he crossed Central Park West into 64th Street towards Broadway when he spotted a very attractive woman sitting by herself in an outdoor cafe on the corner. She was dressed in a yellow sundress and a large straw hat, and she wore a pair of large designer sunglasses he knew must have cost a week's pay of an executive secretary. He knew that because he was with his wife when she bought the same pair.

The woman must be an actress or model the way she carried herself, sitting so elegantly in that chair holding a drink with an umbrella in it.

Harry himself was close to forty-five with an eighteen-year-old daughter that attended a prestigious school in Switzerland. Does he have the nerve to approach this woman? He asked himself. What would he say to her? He hadn’t done anything like that since his marriage twenty-two years ago.

As he approached her closer, he saw her turn towards him and give him a sort of look over. Harry was tall, still slim with a stomach as flat as a washboard. He still had a full head of black hair that he had done only two days ago which cost him a hundred and twenty-five dollars with a tip.

While he was thinking what he should do, another man came over to the woman with apparently the same idea as he had, but the woman turned him away and gave Harry a thin smile which gave him the confidence to walk over, but he also thought of a way to impress her by making a fake business call on his cell.

About five feet away he stopped and with as much bravado as he could, talked into the phone just high enough so she could hear.

“All right then, make the deal for 38 million, and that’s the final offer.” He then hung up and removed his own sunglasses and gave her his practiced smile.

“Ah, money, what would we do without it?” He said trying to impress her. “By the way, I couldn’t help but notice your sunglasses, may I ask you where you bought them? I want to buy those for someone, but I have never seen this style anywhere around here.”

The woman took her time while she took a sip of her drink. She then took off her glasses slowly, almost seductively, and looked at him with her auburn eyes that surprisingly had little make upon them, as if she didn’t think she needed any, which in fact was true!

“These glasses?” She asked lazily as she turned them in her hand. “I bought them in Rome this spring.”

“Rome?” Harry asked puzzled. “Oh, they don’t sell them in New York?” He was now standing across what was a plastic separation of the cafe and the sidewalk.

The woman looked Harry up and down as if he was some hick from Appalachia, “Well, I haven’t seen them here either, but perhaps, Tiffany would carry them. They carry very fissionable items.”

Jack smiled, he saw the woman also smile and he guessed she was teasing him. “You realize that I can have you arrested right now…” He said solemnly.

“Really, for what?” Still with that lazy look.

“New York City Ordinance, CO-453-58.” 

“And that is?” She asked chewing on the earpiece of her expensive sunglasses.

“Fabricating a story to a pedestrian on a sidewalk.”

“Oh, and you are a knowledgeable pedestrian? Perhaps a lawyer?”

Harry didn’t answer but came around the artificial separation and stood across from her. “May I join you and buy you another of what you’re having, or are you waiting for an Arabian Prince to buy you another pair of those sunglasses?

She folded her glasses away and pointed to the empty chair with them. “You may if you like. It's expensive; I bought this drink …”

“Yes, I know, in Rome…”

She had a great laugh, thought Harry, sort of like sparkling champaign.

“I’m Harry…” Harry extended his hand.

“Natalia.” She said shaking it.

A waiter came by with a menu. “Would you care to order, Sir.”

“Bring the Lady another of those umbrella drinks, and I’ll have a Gin and Tonic.”

The waiter left, and they stared intently at each other for a few minutes.

“So, Harry, are you really interested in knowing where to purchase a pair of my glasses, or were you secretly admiring me from over there, while faking a phone conversation?” she pointed to the spot where she first saw him.

Harry’s eyes crinkled into a smile while turning and looking in that direction. “Was I that transparent?”

“I have you rather at a disadvantage. I am a novelist, and for my books, I sit here at this cafe once or twice a week for a few hours appraising people. I sometimes wonder who would dare to come over to a character like I am impersonating and you were the most interesting one so far.” She said.

“Oh? What about that man I saw coming over to you, just before I came by?”

Natalia considered the question for a moment. “He wanted to see the color of my eyes. Not a bad come-on I suppose, but he did smell a bit of beer, so I told him I was waiting for my husband.”

Harry suddenly put on a concerned look on his face.“Do you have a husband?” He asked.

“You mean in real life?”

Harry shook his head, yes. “In real life…”

Natalia grinned… “Do you care?”

The waiter brought their drinks and asked if there was anything else they needed. They didn’t.

Natalia lowered her head but kept looking at Harry.

“If it's less complicated for you Harry, no, I am not married, at this time. Does that make it easier for you then?”

Harry returned her look. What a gorgeous creature she was, he thought laughingly, he could hardly wait to bring her home to his pad. 

“OK. So, have you written anything I know? I don’t recall an author named Natalia …” He asked playfully.

“Well, I write under a pen name.”

“A pen name, so what name would that be…” He asked.

She looked at him silently for a moment as if she was contemplating what to say. “Felicia Waldorf.” She finally came out with.

There was a pause. “Felicia Waldorf? Where in heaven’s did you come up with a name like that?” Harry asked chuckling. “That’s a pretty clever name… Felicia…”

Natalia couldn’t help herself and started to giggle but was cut off as she heard Harry’s phone ring with a familiar sound. “Isn’t that…?”

Harry took out his phone from a side pocket, it was his daughter’s unique ring, and she would be calling from Switzerland, and it was midnight there, and she wouldn’t call so late unless something was wrong. He answered the phone apprehensively.

“Hello sweetheart, are you all right? Did something happen…?” He asked his daughter uneasily.

Natalia now leaned forward with a worried look in her face, “What is it, Harry?” then grabbed the phone from him, “Darling, its mom, what’s the matter? Were you in an accident?”

“Oh mother, I’m fine, I just flew in from Zurich wanting to surprise you, but no ones at home. Where are you?”

“She’s at our apartment here,” she whispered to Harry, “she just flew in, isn’t it marvelous?” Then back to the phone, she said. “Dad and I are not far away dear. We’ll be right there. It is such a lovely surprise…” Then again to Harry. “Can you believe that? She came home to surprise us. Pay for the drinks dear and let's go home.” Their previous charade forgotten as they stood up to leave.

Both smiled at each other then Harry leaned over and kissed his wife, Mabel, on the cheek. “Our daughter always had perfect timing…” He said as they laughed mischievously and walked out towards their apartment two blocks away holding hands.

“So what do you think? Would you have fallen for my act?” Mabel asked.

“For Felicia Waldorf? Any time! When did you come up with that name?”

“Never mind that. Your fake phone conversation… that’s a first, and a $65 million deal, not bad…”

“Don’t overdo it, it was only 38 million…” Harry whispered as he put his arm around his wife’s bare shoulders and pulled her lovingly to himself.