"And there she was..."

He pulled his car into an empty alleyway hoping in this heavy snow laden street parking was permitted on this busy Christmas eve. Before getting out of the car he pondered whether he would need his laptop or should just go in with a novel. He had about an hour to kill and didn’t know whether he wanted to get some work done or just spend some time catching up on his reading, which he knew was lacking a lot. At the end he decided on neither and just got out of the car with his airpods in his ears and played his favourite Christmas tunes. 

The street was surprisingly empty with very little noise from the oncoming vehicles. The snow on the pavement was thick as he strode to the nearby café, the one he always ends up at least twice a week. He loved this place because it had large glass for a wall that looked straight into the town centre. He could spend hours in there looking and pondering at random people walking, talking and just living their lives. 

As he walked into the café, he was greeted by a friendly face who took his order. 

‘A flat white, please,” he said

“Anything else,” the café person asked with a smile in her face. 

“No, thank you,” he replied. 

“That will be 3.40 please,” 

“of course,” he said as he tapped on the contactless card reader. 

“Merry Christmas,” she uttered, and he hurriedly wished her back. 

The café was busy. People walking in constantly, some leaving. The place seemed packed but thankfully he was able to spot an empty chair on the far end of the room right next to the glass wall. He moved quickly to it before he could lose the place to someone else. Happily, he sat there, removed the Airpods from his ears since the café was filled with mild Christmas tunes which was constantly drowned by the noise of people walking and talking. But he didn’t mind that. The café was warm, maybe a bit too warm, but he was comfortable and content. 

His coffee arrived. He took the first sip, satisfied with its temperature and taste he sat back and relaxed. It has been a long week and this one hour was precious. Finally, he can sit back and relax a bit. Turn his mind off things and tomorrow can sort itself later, right now he can just sit and enjoy this cup of coffee. As he sat there and looked around, he was able to see so many smiling faces, hurdled, gossiping, laughing, wishing each other. It put a smile on his face to see so many happy faces. And he turned around and looked outwards. The town centre was almost empty with very few people venturing about on this snowy day. It was a white Christmas after all. 

Once he finished his coffee, he wished he could have brought his book to read. Frustrated with himself he put his Airpods back in his ears and played his favourite playlist. His mind wandered as he wished he was not spending his Christmas alone but thoughts like that could soon spiral out of control and he was not willing to do that, hence he buried that feeling and looked around. 

Someone walked into the café. Something about that person made his heart to jump. Black dress, red scarf which covered almost half her face, short blonde hair. ‘It can’t be,’ he thought, ‘it surely can’t be her.’ His heart refused to stop racing. Unknowingly he sat up trying to get a good look at this person. She stood in a line to order with her back turned towards him. His hands were trembling from excitement, shock and memories. He almost jumped out of the chair trying desperately to see if it was Her. 

It felt like eternity. He patiently waited for her to turn around. Finally, she turned around with a coffee in her hand and there she was. It was her, and now his heart almost jumped out of his chest. Emotions flooded almost choking him. He hasn’t seen her forever but has never spend a day without thinking about her. 

She looked around to see if she could find a place to sit. Without realising what he was doing he got up from his chair and stood. Their eyes met. Her face registered shock for a split second and quickly got replaced with a smile. The smile which he was longing to see so many years. A smile that took his breath away, still. She walked towards him, and he suddenly realised his legs were shaking, excitement? Fear? Or maybe bit of both. 

“How are you?” she asked approaching him. 

“I’m fine. How are you?” he asked back blushing with a grin. 

“I’m fine too,” she said as she hesitated to hug him. He extended his arms, and she walked into his embrace. Her head against his chest and his arms around her, tight. He felt like the time stopped; his heart calmed. Tremendous amount of joy filled his heart almost choked him. Memories came rushing in. He was not able to contain himself. He wished this lasted forever, but he had to let her go. Both looked back at each other with the same smile but this time both of their eyes were glistening with tears. 

He helped her to remove her coat and pulled the chair back for her to sit. And he quickly sat across her and looked at her. Both might have aged since they last saw each other but his heart still thumped like for the first time he laid his eyes on her. He was so overwhelmed that words betrayed him as he sat there silently just taking in everything; her beautiful face, that breath taking smile, those gorgeous eyes – which made him to fall in love all over again. And those wrinkles around her eyes when she smiled, which has not changed. It only made him realise that he never stopped loving her even after all these years, he was still madly in love with her. 

Finally, she spoke and in a blink of an eye an hour turned into two as they both shared their life’s journey since they have parted. Minutes were flying and he wished he could stop the time. She checked the clock in her phone and her face changed and he knew it was time for her to leave. He couldn’t bear the thought of saying goodbye again to her. ‘What if I never see her again,’ he thought petrified. Fate, for whatever reason, made them meet that Christmas eve and he was not going to let that be a co-incidence. 

“Are you free for an hour tomorrow?” he asked hesitantly. 

“I have dinner plan with my family,” she uttered knowing that she was breaking his heart and her own. She saw his face turn pale as his smile faded. “Maybe I can spare a quick visit before I head for the dinner?” 

His smile returned. He had lot to do tomorrow, many laid out plans but all of that can wait. He didn’t care, none of that mattered at this moment. “Can we meet here tomorrow anytime that is suitable for you?” he said with a same excitement as a child. 

“Maybe noon,” she said. “I’m sorry but I have to leave now. Time slipped by. It was so good to see you again.” 

“It was,” he replied.

They both got up. He helped her with her coat and walked with her to the door. 

“Hopefully we meet tomorrow,” she said with a smile. He could see a bit of sadness in her smile. And she hugged him again. He held her tight once more. Screaming inside his mind ‘Please don’t go baby.’ But no words came out. He slowly released her from his grip and saw her turn around and walk away from him. He was smiling but tears started to roll out with no control. The love of his life walking away from him, again. 

That night was painful. A sleepless night. He just lay there with a vacant eye lost deep into the past. The days where they were together, the laughter, jokes, the long drives, castles conquered together, countryside walk, music that were shared and a future that was planned that never came to be. As the sun rose, he got up from the bed and ran to the shower. He had 5 hours to meet her again, but he was restless. No amount of logic or reasoning was going to dampen his excitement to see her again, even if this meeting could very well be the last goodbye that was never uttered years ago. A closure that he never wanted. 

It was 11 am. Sun was out blinding everyone with the reflection off the snow. He almost ran to the café. He was one of the few in the café on that Christmas day. He was full of hope (for what?) and excitement. He ran to the same table and sat there waiting. The minutes which were flying last evening was crawling today, which made him feel that hour of waiting dreadful. But nothing was getting his spirit down. 

The clock finally struck 12. His heart which was already pounding started to beat out of his chest. ‘Any moment now,’ he thought to himself as he kept scanning every face that walked out there. He was barely able to sit still on that chair.

The clock turned 12:15, still no sign of her. He was getting impatient. 

12:30. He started to get nervous. ‘What if she couldn’t make it? Will this be the end.’ And cursed himself for not getting her number to contact her. 

12:40. All hope was lost and his heart started to sink. His face turned pale, and his body slumped back to the chair. Eyes started to swell. The world around him started to fade away. He felt so alone. He hopelessly waited for another 10 minutes when the café door swung open letting in the cold Christmas wind. 

And there she was.