Prom Night

It’s a quiet day in the suburbs of Indianapolis, trees rustle as the winter wind brushes past their twigs and branches, and golden brown leaves fly far away into the sky only to float back down with elegance and sweet beauty. 

Calvin, in the cold with only shorts, a short-sleeved shirt, and a thin gray sweater, has been waiting patiently in front of his neighborhood apartment for the movers to arrive... for what has felt like ages. They were supposed to get to his home at approximately 10:30 AM, now it’s 12:07 and the sky is just getting grayer, grayer than his sweater. Calvin has been waiting for this moment longer than he’d like to admit, 3 years of middle school, 4 years of high school, and 4 more years of college, just to finally live alone, from people, and that memory.

At the start of the day he was far from the mood then he was in now. He went to bed at a good time and woke up with energy and excitement, and now Calvin’s bored and cold face was all the passing people could see.

“Just a few minutes more till they're here,” he said to himself. 

He looked down,

Maybe I won’t get as cold if I obscure my face,”

he thought to himself, it didn’t work, he was still outside, alone, with no one to talk to or joke around with to distract himself from the weather. 

Days like these, always remind Calvin of that night…one awful night; he could almost see his dress shoes, slacks, and the tail end of his “nice” coat, which looked like a Scottish kilt had gone to a funeral. It was all coming back to him now, just as scary as when it had happened.

It was prom night, nearing midnight, in Calvin’s junior year. The week before, Calvin was getting ready to ask a girl he had a crush on, except it was nearing more towards an obsession, out to prom. His day was going well, his plan to ask her out after school set in place, before his jock of a friend pushed him towards his crush, in the middle of the cafeteria, grinning and giving Calvin a thumbs up. All of the eyes on him, all of the quiet voices behind his back. The request was more of a proclamation in a letter, except with tons of stammers and stutters. Calvin couldn't even remember what he said exactly but he knew it was not worth remembering, that's for sure. After he was done talking, for the second time, and after a great pause, all his crush said was “Okay, just make sure you wear something nice alright?”

He nodded violently and it was left like that for a week, no extra talking or planning with his crush, just silently glancing and awkward smiles. Calvin always had a hard time empathizing or reading expressions on other people, it came in especially when he was talking with “friends” and he didn't know what to say to connect with them.

A gust of wind knocked Calvin’s thoughts back in place, he looked up to see how it was still barren of trucks or people. 

“I lost my train of thought,” he said to himself. Calvin proceeded to think back to the night, on the steps of the high school right before his worst mistake ever. Nothing could compare to what shame he felt that night. 

Calvin took a few deep breaths, he had never experienced a party or event like this one, especially considering he would be hanging out with someone other than his family. Calvin never took the time or energy to “hang out” with other people before, for him it was always road trips and vacations, not to mention how even those trips are few and far between. But, after tonight, he’ll finally go out more, talk to more people, and make good friends, friends who are kind and friendly, friends who are soft-spoken and caring, what he thought people should be were normally, except the bullies and such. 

Kids were filing in, and the registration made sure everybody had their ticket and made sure people who didn’t, didn’t get in. Calvin filed in line, excitement, and terror making a horrible cocktail of thoughts, “What if I can't dance, I don't dance, what if she turns around and bails, what if there's a super hot guy who woos my crush, what will happen to me if that comes true, god who are the hottest people here.” Calvin looked around slightly frantic but he hoped not to be so frantic people would notice. He saw a total of(what he considered) 6 hot jocks, chiseled jaws and everything, 5 hot girls, all of which many of the male students fawned over for… whatever… reasons they had, and lastly, no sight of his crush anywhere.

He slowly crept to the makeshift ticket stand.

“Your ticket sir,” Ms. Peggy said, she always treated school and these nights with formality, mostly for fun.

“R-right here miss.” Calvin stuttered, pulling out his overly expensive ticket.

After a couple of seconds of checking it out, she waved Calvin in and said, “Well come on in sir” with a chuckle.

“Th-thank you” Calvin was wracked with jitters since talking to his crush about prom, normally he would jitter or stutter only every once in a while, depending on the situation.

Then, just for a moment, looking at the dance floor and all of his peers, the beautiful lights dancing with them, the light conversations, all of it. He thought it would be overwhelming, he was correct but not like this. The warmth inside his chest, the brilliant bright lights blinding him, everyone's smiles and laughter. He felt… peaceful, for a single fleeting moment, he didn’t think of the future or everything he did wrong, just existing… just living.

Calvin, and his best friend Laura, were leaning on one of the school pillars, all of the students thought they were there for style only. Laura was just talking about her time with drama class while they were waiting for Calvin’s crush. Calvin was thinking about 

. Her kind demeanor, the way she treats her friends, and how they treat her, Calvin didn’t know what to call it, but it felt like, respect, trust, openness and kindness it had latched onto him for over a year… since the first day of school.

“Hey dude… are you daydreaming?” Laura said with a drawn-out joking tone.

“No, I-I’m night dreaming, there's a difference” Calvin replied

“Dude, that would just be a normal dream then, you would be sleeping,” She said matter of factly “Are you sleep talking” Laura continued with a joking, haunted tone.

“Heh, no no, sometimes I wish I was, but I don’t think even the most zonked-out kid in class could fall asleep in these conditions.” Both of them chuckled lightly, slightly awkward-like, and then they returned to silence.

Many a time Calvin would think, “Does Laura like me? Like…” and right afterward he would think “Nah, why would she like me of all people.” One of those moments was just about when they first met.

It was in middle school, it was during the recess period, and Calvin would sit, as possibly far away from people as possible, reading his book. When Laura, with her scratched, dirty knees, and her overworn, way too big soccer shirt, looking down on him with those piercing, ever so normal, brown eyes, decided to talk to him. You know what she said? 

She said “You look cool.” with an expression Calvin can only guess would’ve been fascination.

“Says you” He would often retort when he was young, even if it didn’t make sense.

“You think I’m cool!” her face gleaming with excitement. Calvin went silent, face red. Being how this is quite possibly the first time in his life he was talking to someone other than his family or when he needed to for school activities. He didn’t know what to say, all the while this girl was staring at him, waiting for a response, or for her excitement to calm down.

Finally mustering up the courage he said “Y-yeah, I-I mean, your hair’s cool” half-heartedly. It was nice hair, brown, just like her eyes, long and fluffy, so long, she would have to tie it back during recess.

Laura seemed to have calmed down enough to say “Thank you, I work hard to make sure it’s nice and healthy.” looking proud of herself, she took her hair bands out to reveal the fluffy lake of hair on her head.

Calvin was first, surprised, then fascinated, then concerned “Isn’t that amount of hair… stressful to take care of, with all the weight, and knots and dirt and sti-” 

“Well it’s my responsibility,” she interrupted, “What kind of woman would I be in the future if I can’t handle all of those things, most of the time at once.” she continued.

Calvin felt a little yucky when she said the phrase “What kind of woman would I be” 

“What do you mean ‘what kind of woman would I be’?” he asked 

She stated “Well… I want everybody to think I'm pretty, my hair is by far my most defining trait wouldn’t you say” 

“Uuh, I guess so?”

“Right. Well I didn’t come here just to talk about myself, I think your book looks cool.”

Calvin and Laura continued like this till recess was over, and they would talk till there wasn’t anything else they already thought was cool about each other. Up until freshman year they never really introduced themselves by their name and both of them would rely on other people talking to each other to get a hint at what it could be.

Calvin was staring at a wall, overthinking each conversation and facial expression to find if, how, or when, there was a possibility…

“Earth to Calvin? You there bro” Laura said while lightly slapping his cheek.

“Uhh huh, what?” Calvin said, disoriented. “Uh yeah, I just got lost in thought again.”

“Okay, listen, I know you space out a bunch, but now's not the time buddy, your crush could be here any second”

“Oh, you think so?” 

“Yeah, her friends just arrived, and she could just be waiting at the door for you. Now go!” 

Calvin stumbled in anxious panic. He rushed toward the entrance hall and… she wasn’t there. No sign of her, students were roaming the corridor, and there wasn’t any crush. Not even outside of the school.

Calvin looked everywhere and anywhere. Was he right, had she ditched him, did she fool him into believing he had any chance at love? He got the courage, he talked to the girl, he got the ticket and suit. He had worked so hard to make this work, “So why wasn’t she there?” he thought.

“Are you okay man?” This time the voice came from Brian, Calvin recognized him as a friend of his crush, he was with his girlfriend when they found Calvin, looking crazed, with his hands on his face and hair, messing up his hair gelled to top it off. Calvin couldn’t say anything, he had to settle down and try to think clearly. 

“Do you know where my crush is?” Calvin thought he sounded like a pleading dog. Brian looked perplexed, then he realized something, then he looked disgusted.

“Don’t call my friend a ‘crush.’ I don’t know where they are bro, maybe try to ask their name next time.”

Before Calvin could plead not guilty they stormed off to their other friends.

Laura was drinking another cup of “fruit punch,” it just tasted like Kool-Aid, while contemplating her life choices, when she saw Calvin, slouched back, dower, almost depressed look on his face. Laura immediately knew what happened based on how he looked. 

“Rough night?” She said, trying to lighten the mood.

“I’m going home now,” Calvin said with a deadpan tone and expression. Laura was all too familiar with this emotion, a mix of being dumped for no reason and your hair being pulled.

“God, I’m so sorry Calvin” Trying to be sincere, she had a hard time trying to get the right tone for situations like this, so she’ll try to be empathic and open to Calvin. “You don’t deserve something like this, especially not from that wannabe fashion model.”

“I think I’ve learned something today,” Calvin said with the same tone and expression, it was starting to get kinda creepy.

“What did you learn man?” she asked, after some pause, to collect his thoughts he said

“It doesn’t matter what you hope for or who you like, people are uncontrollable, relentless, and monstrous. And I can’t do anything to control that, I'm a helpless baby bird who can’t fly or feed myself.”

Laura was too stunned to speak, she knew it would be rough if Calvin got stood up but she wasn’t expecting this. 

“No matter what I do I can't control what other people do, and I know it, but I keep expecting they will. It only continues to hurt me.” Calvin explained. At this point it was starting to get ridiculous, yeah we can’t control what people do, but it’s not his job to change people. Laura took care of herself, and she believed everybody ought to do the same. Calvin was still talking and talking to no end, she had to stop this from going too far. 

Calvin was speaking from the top of his head, about all of his frustrations, everything including the way others talked to him and how fake all his friends had been. Suffice it to say he was very surprised when he felt a burning hot slap across his face, taking him back a few steps.

“Stop talking, you narcissistic…” Laura’s voice trailed off  “I know, people can be awful, but how could it possibly be your responsibility?! The world doesn't revolve around YOU! You can make a difference if you’re actively working for it. And you’ve just been sulking in the corner, while every good, fun venture, party, hang out, and relationship, flies far, far, away from you!”

Calvin was too stunned to speak, Laura was audibly heaving from shouting so loud for so long. The entire room was silent. Both of their legs felt like jelly, a queasiness building up in the stomach, Laura felt this when performing on stage, and Calvin felt this whenever he spoke up.

Both of them turned around to see their peers staring at them, even the DJ had his mouth agape.

Calvin was too emotional, too angry, too sad, too surprised. He was frozen in place. Students were struggling to get the motivation to dance. The taste in the air was bitter and sour.

“Do you know how long I’ve waited to call you narcissistic?” Laura said, breaking the silence in the room.

“I. uh, I’m…” Calvin couldn’t find the words. He had to get away, had to hide, had to run. This all felt like a reality TV show, he hated how unnecessary the drama felt whenever he watched with his parents. None of this would’ve happened if he just stayed silent as he always was.

Calvin looked at Laura, beads of sweat formulating from stress alone. He stared at those ferocious brown eyes, He couldn’t look at her face any longer, he was a disgrace to a friend, even worse, a disgrace to his only real friend.

Calvin stammered an “I… I’m sorry” before bolting to the exit. He ran as hard as he could, tears flying off his red hot cheeks, as he ran out into the cold dead of night.

Calvin never talked to Laura after that night… he could never forget what she said before he ran off like a coward. For years he’s kept one night in mind when it came to interacting with other people, but it was never nice talking to people his age, especially if they were there that night. It was never the same, he was trying to be more social when others got more distant. It was lucky he could hold a conversation with a moving company. 

“Come to think of it,” he thought, “would I still be a coward by moving away? From the people I know, from the people who knew me, from everything.” It was getting dark, it was 1:50 PM and it wasn’t getting any warmer. He decided it was a bust, and started to head inside when he heard a truck horn. Calvin turned around to see the mover’s truck pull up to his driveway. 

“Oh my god, finally!” he exclaimed "I've been waiting for just about 3 hours, where have you guys been!?” 

“Says you!” A familiar voice called back. He froze in place. “Yeah, I dropped out of college to help people with something I couldn’t help myself with. Moving on.” Laura said while she stepped out of the driver's seat.

Words could not express the amount of thoughts and emotions going through their heads. There's a lot to be explained and a lot of making up to do, but for Calvin, there's been a question he’s been wanting to ask for a while. 

“Did you like me, like… love me, please I need to know,” Calvin asked.

“I did, but we’re going to have to work on it. Now buddy, let's get your stuff ready to go, shall we?” Laura replied as she walked past him.

“She’s right,” Calvin thought, they needed to work back up to it after his stunt. For now, he can reconcile. 

“You want to catch up at a cafe or something?” Calvin asked innocently. Laura looked back a little confused by his sudden tone change, but, all she cared about, was she had her friend back. So she said “Yeah… I’d like that.”