Faceless Reflections

I have the sense that I’ve been here awhile, lost in the house of mirrors. And, yet, my memories of my time here are obscured by fog. Instead of memories, it seems I only have an absence of them.  With each moment that passes I do not remember the moments that came before. I do not remember for what reasons I am here, lost and trapped in the house of mirrors. 

I become more confused the farther I travel, each hall, each corridor, each room the same as the last.   Every direction I turn all that can be seem are mirrors.  All I see when I look around is myself, and the bewildered expression upon my face.  

This place must have been created only to confuse and perplex.  Everything looks the same no matter how far I walk and I cannot think straight. It is as if my brain has been possessed.  I have no way to track where I’ve been, my only possessions being the clothing upon my back. 

I cannot discern whether it is night or day, for there is a shadowy brightness in here. I know though, that I myself am no more than a zombie, wide-eyed awake, yet my thoughts blurred with tiredness.  I can only hope desperately that this is all some dark, twisted nightmare.  

As the hours pass and I continue to walk in this only half-conscious state I begin to hear things.  Footsteps upon the white concrete floor, voices that are not my own.  Maybe my mind is playing tricks on me, I think, but the noises sound too real.  Is this all an illusion? Or am I going mad?

I stop to listen and I swear I hear a cough from the space to my left.  Nothing comes of it so I continue on, through the house of mirrors.  I walk and wait until my cold, bare feet begin to ache and my legs grow stiff.  I stop briefly to sit on the floor and rest my heavy head on my knees.  I’ve rested only a moment when I hear an echoing thud as if something has been thrown upon the ground.  

I jump up, suddenly.  Fear holds me in a tight grip, squeezing my throat so I cannot breathe, choking my brain so I cannot think.  Unthinking, I glance in the mirror in front of me.  I gasp in horror, not at my own reflection, but at the reflection of another being in the mirror. It seems to be behind me; a wretched creature without a face wavering in the reflection.  I whip around, frantically, but not a single soul is there. I am flooded with puzzlement.  I turn back to look in the mirror. The faceless creature is gone. 

I try to breathe deep to calm my racing pulse.  I look down at my shaking hands. I need to be calm, I need to rationalize, I need to escape this horrid prison.  I make myself walk. I force myself to decide which way to turn and where to go. But, try as I might, I cannot forget the faceless being. Now everywhere I look all I see are the terrible reflections of these creatures, all I hear are the eerie echoes of voices.  

I think about the way that here, time doesn’t seem to pass at all. I don’t know how long I’ve been here, deprived of food, water and sleep. Logically, I know it can only have been a few days at most, but nothing about this place is logical.  I feel as though I have been wandering about for months and months, long enough to make a person crazy.  

As I walk, I catch my reflection in the mirror. It does not look like me, though I know it is. I look around, but I am the only one here. My face is gone, like all the other terrifying creatures in this place.  Automatically I bring my shaking hand to feel for my features.  All I feel is smooth skin, no eyes, nor nose, nor mouth…nothing.  

Have I become a monster, I wonder.  But my thoughts are warped and I cannot fathom an answer. For a brief moment I am shocked, senseless, too afraid to make a move. All I can do is stand there and gawk.

Finally, I begin to run, my fight or flight instincts kicking in.  My thoughts are so muddled I must rely on my legs to take me where I need to go.  My heart beats in the back of my throat as I run like I’ve never run before.  My legs beat the ground with immense speed and ferocity.  I run until I feel like my heart will come up out of my throat and then I run some more.  I run until my legs burn as though covered in flames and then I continue to run. I am but a ball of frantic, flailing limbs.  

I hear the echoes and yells and voices, yet none are lucid enough to comprehend.  That is when I realize that I cannot escape.  The dread hits me a moment later, sinking into my veins like lead.  

I crumple to the ground in defeat.  I hug my knees and rock back and forth.  I hear the echoing voices.  Give up, they say.  There is no escaping, they say.  Succumb to your fate, they say.  I cannot distinguish what is real and what is in my head. I plug my ears and the voices lessen but do not go away.  It is easier to think with the voices quieter.  But, my thoughts are no better than the voices.  I cannot remember what I am trying to escape.  My mind? The house of mirrors? The voices and faceless creatures?  

 I know there is no escaping any of it.  Somehow in my soul I know I am condemned, that no matter how far I run I will never get out.  I know that I am trapped here, just another faceless creature haunting the house of mirrors.  

I realize that the voices are right.  I must succumb to my fate, stop trying, because I am now a resident of this place.  With that last thought I let myself be possessed completely, feel my soul disappear, and I feel myself slip away.