From the Eyes of the Koopa General

(Trigger Warning: Some violence, death, suicide attempt and mild language)

Shortly after I hatched from an egg back in the Dark Lands, my parents had abandoned me for only Grambi knows why. Ever since then, I knew I had to do whatever I could to survive, so I would search for food, even when that meant going from trash can to trash can. Then one night, some Rex woman found me rummaging through a trash can for food, so she took me in and gave me most of her roast chicken, which I had graciously eaten. However, little did I know that she was planning to train me to become a deadly fighter for her upcoming Professional Creature Fighting tournament in the next four years, so as I eventually grew a little older, she gave me stuffed animals to practice my fighting skills and I took it in stride because I was so grateful that she took me in that I knew I had to repay her.

One day, when I was four, she decided that I was ready to my first ever match at the Professional Creature Fighting tournament, whereupon I had hoped that she would bet on me with everyone else together, but instead, she decided to bet on my opponent, which would be the Krusha and, boy, was he so strong! I tried to run from him because I didn’t want to die at his claws, but this only got me booed by the audience until I retreated into my spiky blue shell before jetting towards the Krusha, during which I circled above him for a few seconds prior to fatally landing on him; in turn, this caused an explosion that was deadly enough to kill him, which caused the audience to cheer on my victory. However, I did not know this was the only time I would ever get to participate in the Professional Creature Fighting tournament, so the Rex woman who took me in brought me back to her house before treating my injuries and yet I didn’t know that she was about to apologize me, though I forgave her…and that was when she finally adopted me.

As four additional years eventually passed and she quit her job as a PCF champion and started working as a cook at the tavern in the Dark Lands that was called “The Dark Moon Tavern”, we were preparing to celebrate Christmas; right now, this was Christmas Eve and I wanted to watch some black-and-white children’s show featuring a hand puppet of a mouse with a top hat, whom I’d like to call Mr. Mugsy, but instead, she made me turn off the TV in addition to promising me that if I would brush my teeth before bed, she would read me a bedtime story; she also told me that I needed to be in bed before Santa came down the nonexistent chimney in our house. Of course I agreed to brush my teeth before bed, after which she then read to me my favorite bedtime story about a Pionpi princess who made a deal with an evil wizard to become human, but at the cost of her magic healing powers. A brave human prince then battled and defeated the wizard but almost died in the process and with the curse broken, the princess used her powers to save him and then they got married and lived happily ever after. Then as soon as she finished reading me that story, I was finally about to fall asleep, so she kissed me good night. However, little did I know that she was about to die in a house fire a few months later.

The next day, I woke up early in the morning and despite my eagerness to open up my Christmas presents, I didn’t open any of them yet because I knew that it would be better for me to just wait until the Rex woman who adopted me woke up as well. I was a well-behaved child, right? Right! When she finally woke up, that was when she signaled me to open up my Christmas presents; as I opened them, I saw that they consisted of plastic dinosaurs, toy trains, toy cars, toy robots and toy soldiers and yet I loved all of them the same. Then she presented me one more Christmas present that I would never forget: a spear. As she handed it over to me and I unwrapped it, she explained to me that her mother gave her that when she was my age and that she wanted me to have it now. Then as I thanked her for it, another Rex, a male, came over and mocked her in addition to accusing her of giving away their mother’s prized possession in quitting her job as a PCF champion in favor of working as a cook in the Dark Moon Tavern; that was when she tore him a new butthole before kicking him out; afterwards, she reminded me that I was a very strong kid and to never let anyone call me a weakling, after which we then went on to cook some breakfast on top of watching those Christmas specials on TV.

Then one day, she brought me to the Dark Moon Tavern, during which her boss agreed to let me stay on the condition that I wouldn’t bother any customers. Lucky me that she allowed me to bring my toys with me, so I knew I would be fine there anyway. Then a few moments later, she realized that she forgot her wallet, so she let me know that she would be back soon and that she needed to pick up her wallet from our house, since she was planning to go grocery shopping later in the evening after work, so we exchanged our “byes” to each other for what didn’t know would be the last time. Then her boss eventually gave me lunch and then dinner, even though that still didn’t stop us from wondering where she was…until a frantic Sledge Bro. barged in through the swinging doors and started screaming at us about the fire. Then despite my mom’s boss trying to tell me to stay put, I quickly flew out of the tavern towards what used to be our house; afterwards, I couldn’t believe my eyes: the firefighters were there and our house was on fire…with my mother inside! I tried to go in and rescue her, but the firefighters held me back out of fear that I would burn to death as well, which made me realize that I wasn’t strong enough to save her. And that was it. My mother, the Rex woman who adopted me, took care of me and loved me as her own son, was gone forever. I lost her to the house fire.

After that day, I was alone again and I had to learn to fend for myself, during which I learned to fight off those bastards who kept calling me a weakling. So far, I saw that I was getting stronger day by day while putting them in their place.

Then one day, I was putting more of them in their place for calling me a weakling, a Koopa prince, along with a blue robed Magikoopa, found me and decided to take me in; afterwards, they took care of me and then when I turned eighteen, I had to join the army. Luckily for me, however, I became the strongest soldier to ever exist, thanks to my basic combat skills.

Then one day, I came back to the Dark Moon Tavern when I caught a random Boom Boom harassing a red-shelled Koopa Troopa with an eyepatch, so I gave him a what-for prior to chasing him away. Then the Koopa Troopa thanked me, during which we introduced ourselves to each other; afterwards, I decided to recruit him.

Then when we were training, another Koopa Troopa, this time, a girl with a purple shell and brown curly hair, met us and introduced herself to us and vice-versa, which prompted us to be friends with her. Then a few months later, two more Koopa Troopas, one with a gold shell and another one with a green shell, met and introduced themselves to us and vice-versa and that was when we befriended them as well.

Then one day, King Bowser promoted some of us Koopas as high-ranking military officers, during which I became the Koopa General that I am today; afterwards, he plotted with us to invade the Snow Kingdom, where we would kidnap those penguins in addition to helping him steal the Super Star from them.

Then a week before we invaded the Snow Kingdom, our king decided to send us to the Koopa Village, where I had killed the four friends of the lavender-shelled Koopa Paratroopa girl, whom I then helped Bowser kidnap afterwards.

Then after our raid at the Snow Kingdom, I was sent to the Jungle Kingdom, where I carefully spied on that mustachioed moron, who was fighting that big ape. As much as I’d hate to admit it, I must say that he was one hell of a fighter, indeed. After the battle, I then flew back to our airship, whereupon I then informed my king, who was practicing his marriage proposal to the princess of his dreams with the same Magikoopa who helped take me in; afterwards, I told him what I saw and that was when he decided to send us to the Rainbow Road, during which I decided to drive that horrifying bulldozer with a mechanical maw that seeks to crush those who stood in my way.

As soon as we took to the Rainbow Road and all of us were fighting those do-gooders, I decided to go after that toilet-brained idiot, even when that meant knocking over my own fellow Koopas in addition to the Kongs in my process. It was only a matter of time before I eventually got to him and when I thought I crushed him to death, I was losing control of myself, as proven by my mad laughter; however, little did I know that he was still alive, so when I saw him again, he jumped on me prior to landing on that big ape’s kart; during which they then fired that huge rocket at me from behind. Afterwards, I emerged from my wreckage prior to yelling at them from behind that they could not escape me.

“You can’t escape me!” I snarled.

“What?” that mustachioed moron asked.

That was when I decided to scream “BLUE SHELL!!!!!!!”, after which I then jumped into my blue shell prior to launching myself towards those do-gooders prior to exploding them into oblivion. Afterwards, we all fell into the sea, yet only I managed to escape the Maw-Ray without even knowing that they were still alive and well. Then the next day came, I was already washed ashore, yet I was too weak to do anything anymore, so all I could do was lay there and realize that I was actually weak all along. That was when I decided to give up on life and acknowledge that I was ready to be at death’s door, yet little did I know that this beautiful lavender-shelled Koopa Paratroopa girl, the same girl whom I had help Bowser kidnap, had found me and decided to nurse me back to health…and I never thought we would fall in love with each other afterwards with the help of her helping me turn my life around on top of us bonding with each other over our missing parents, but I was wrong.As she nursed me back to health, she told me a story about how a Boom Boom thug killed her parents on the same day that she had graduated from a medical school and how that caused her to sink into depression that would've killed her if not for her friends, the same friends whom I had killed in front of her, sending her to a mental hospital for three months in order to save her life and this caused both of us to bond with each other over our respective parents and as we did so, I knew I had to learn how to redeem myself, even when that meant we would eventually fall in love with each other while I was doing so.

In short, our love for each other had changed my life forever...and for the better, or course.

(DISCLAIMER: I wrote this from the Koopa General's POV while basing it on The Super Mario Bros. Movie (2023) and my first Super Mario Bros. fanfic called "Turtles of a Feather". NO HATE COMMENTS, PLEASE!!!)