All That Jazz

The Great War was wreaking havoc everywhere. Not only were we losing people, good, hard working people, we were losing great players to the draft. Being a musician was tough as it is, but being a female musician in 1917… it wasn’t easy. 

I had a gig tonight in Chicago, the Windy City. I lived an hour away on horseback, around five on foot, assuming I got a ride, that is. I liked walking, though. Nature was a second home to me, after my mama died. Daddy made me help with the chores, and while I hated it back then, I was sure grateful for it now. I was independent, which was so uncommon nowadays, all these women thinking they needed a man. It was pathetic.

I was startled out of my reverie by a horn. A blackk car slowed down, some rich old man probably looking for an easy girl. I braced myself, preparing for the worst, but to my surprise, it was a young man, older than me, but still on the young side.

“You need a ride, ma’am?” He asked.

“That depends. What way are ya headed?”

“Well where else? The Windy City of course. There ain’t nothing the way you’re going ‘cept that,” he smiled, revealing straight, pearly whites. He was either blessed or his parents had some money. Most probably the latter.

“So you want a ride?”

“Yes, if you don’t mind, that is. I don’t want to step on any toes.”

“Naw, there’s no toe stepping here,” he got out of his car and the only thing I could think was how big he was. I wasn’t short by no means, a whopping five foot nine, but this man completely towered over me. He had cropped, brown hair that looked like it was consistently styled. Ah, so he was from money.

He walked around the front of his car, stopping in front of me. I craned my neck to look up at this giant of a man. 

“I can take your instrument, if you like,” he reached for it, but I pulled it back to see how he’d respond. 

His hand fell away and I could see a smile start to lift the corners of his mouth. He walked back to the car and opened the back door.

“Or I can at least get the door for you.”

I walked over to put my daddy’s trumpet inside, then took a seat in the front before he could get my door. The engine sputtered, then I heard it crank. He took off, leaving the small spot where I’d been standing in the dust.

“So what’s a lady like you doing out here in between Chicago and nowhere?”

“I have a show tonight, and I figured I’d leave a little early, see the city during daylight.”

He looked at me, incredulous, “You mean to tell me you walk alone at night?”

“Yes sir,” I bristled a bit.

“Do you have anything to protect yourself?” 

“Now if I told you that, I would no longer have the element of surprise.”

I heard him chuckle, then laugh, “I like you. You got spunk, that’s for sure. My name’s Thomas, but my friends call me Tom.”

“Well, Tom, my name’s Elspeth, but everyone calls me Ellie.”

Keeping one hand on the wheel, we shook hands. I liked him, I realized. He wasn’t sexist like most of the men I was inclined to meet. He didn’t frown when I let my opinion be known. Yeah, Tom was okay

The rest of the ride to Chicago was pleasant, conversation coming easy. I directed him to the speakeasy I was playing at, and he pulled close to the sidewalk.

“You said you were going to explore the city,” he paused for a minute. “Would you like me to drive you?”

“No, I can’t impose any longer. You’ve already done enough. I thank you for the offer though. Hopefully our paths will cross again someday. I’ve enjoyed your company, Tom.”

I ducked out of his car, trumpet in hand, and walked through the back door.

Even before the club opened, it was booming with life. The club’s owner, Bruce, was ordering everyone around, trying to get the performers situated. 

“Ellie!” I heard him yell. “Good to see you again. How’s my favorite cowpoke doing?”

“Doing fine, Bruce, doing fine. Where do I need to go?”

“Just set ‘er down anywhere in the back. I’ll have the boys take it back later. You still on for 9:30?”

“Yes sir, if that’s still okay with you.”

“El, you know it is. We love having you play. In my book, you’re one of the greats.”

I smiled as I sat my trumpet down, “Thanks, Bruce.”

He’d already moved on to something else. I figured since it was only five o’ clock, I’d get to roam around the city for a while. Stepping back through the back door, I told myself I’d only shop around for two hours, giving myself plenty of time to get ready for the performance. There was a black car idling in the lot outside, but I barely gave it any thought as I walked down the busy street. 

The first store I came across was a nice dress store off of main street. I opened the door for a few women and was about to go in when a hand landed on my shoulder. Not giving it a second thought, I spun and landed an elbow in the person’s stomach. The man, he was definitely a man because he was way taller than me, doubled over. His face, now level with mine, was familiar.

“Tom?” I asked. “What on Earth?”

He groaned as he hobbled outside. I trailed after him, now guilty I’d hit him.

“Man, El, that was a good punch,” he clutched his side.

“An elbow, actually, but thanks.”

He laughed as we walked down the bustling street.

“So, why did you grab me?” I asked.

“Well, I wanted to get your attention, but I didn’t really think you’d pummel me,”

“You think that’s pummeling? Have you never been in a fight before, Tom?”

“Can’t say I make a habit of it,”

We walked in silence for a while, watching the passersby. I looked up at the clock and almost jumped. It was way past time for me to go.

“Listen, Tom, I gotta go. I’m performing in less than an hour and I’m still in my street clothes. Thanks for walking around with me.”

I shot up from the bench we’d sat down at, but before I could get far, Tom grabbed my wrist, “Wait! Can I come to your show tonight?”

“Yeah. Nobody’s stopping you.”

“I know, but I didn’t want to intrude.”

“Intrude? On me?” I laughed. 

“What’s so funny?” 

“Well, no one’s ever really cared if they ‘intruded’ on me or not, so I guess I just find it funny.”

“What do you mean no one cared?”

I let out a sigh, “No one cares about a poor farm girl’s opinions. No one cares for a woman's opinion period. But to answer your question, no I don’t mind at all if you come watch me, but I’m running out of time.”

He released me, but followed close behind as I ran back toward the club. When I walked in, Bruce was having a conniption. There was already a guy playing on stage and I was the fifth one playing tonight. 

“Sorry, Brucie. I’ll be ready in time.”

“And who the hell is that?” He asked, pointing to Tom.

“He’s good. He’s with me. Just get him a good seat.”

I ran back to my changing room, picking a dress at random and pulling it over my head. I washed my face and applied a little blush before grabbing my trumpet and warming up. I had just enough time to do so before Bruce dragged me out on stage. I looked down to see the piece I was playing, a version of ‘Ragtime’, then,  one of my favorites, the Maytime Waltz. Daddy used to play this song for me and Momma while she taught me to waltz. I sat down on my stool and let my fingers fly across the valves.

Themusic consumed me, a feeling I had craved for a long time after Daddy passed from smallpox last year. Jazz was one of the only things in life that truly made me happy. Besides talking with Tom today, I hadn’t had fun since I don’t know when. Making music was one of the few things I could do to make people happy. And I was good at it.

When my set ended, I walked off the stage with applause following me off the stage. I smiled to myself, hoping I’d made someone's night. Finally, dressing back down to go back into the crowd, I walked out of my dressing room, almost running into a tall man by the door. I tried to breeze past him, but he grabbed my arm.

“What’s a little lady like you doing in there? You don’t belong on a stage. Women folk these days don’t belong nowhere but in the kitchen. It’s about time you learned that.”

He started pulling me against him, and before I could defend myself, I heard a thud and the tall man went down. Standing behind him was Tom, holding a lamp in his hand.

“Thought you might need some help,” he said, his face turning white.

“Tom! What are you doing? I can take care of myself.”

“He said you belonged in a kitchen. The place you belong is on stage in front of millions of people, bringing them joy with your music. You have a gift, El. Don’t let these people cut you down.”

“You think I haven’t dealt with people like him before? I’ve had to swim upriver from the time I first started playing. Men don’t think women are better than they are. At anything. You did not have to knock this guy out. I’m used to it.”

“Yeah, but you shouldn’t be. It’s not right.”

“There’s a lot of things not right in this world, but you know what? We have to deal with it anyway. If you don’t learn to deal with it, life just keeps beating you down until you have nothing left. So, Tom, please tell me how a privileged white boy like yourself knows anything about what goes on that’s not right?”

He  ran his hands through his hair, “There’s a lot of things you don’t know, El. You want to know the reason I have a car? The reason I wear nice clothes?” He reached down and pulled up his pant leg revealing a wooden foot. “I think I know a whole hell of a lot more than you know. I was one of the idiots who signed up for this damn war. Thought a poor farm boy could make a difference. But you know what you get for trying to save the world, or in my case, my squad? Shrapnel in the leg so bad you have to get it cut off. I spent two years in therapy, paid for by the blessed government of course. I decided to use the rest of my money to do something for myself, so I invested in Henry Ford and his cars. It paid off, turns out. So yeah, I know exactly how unright the world is. And you know the kicker? I made friends on the battlefield and now I get to go to their funerals because I’m not there to save them.”

His voice broke and so did my heart. I walked up to him and stood toe to toe with him, looking into his beautiful face. Now, it seemed, I noticed how weathered his face was, the small limp he still has. I wrapped my arms around him and felt him stiffen. Generally, I never got this close to anyone, and never so quickly, but there was something about Tom that got to me. 

He stood there for a beat before engulfing me in his grasp. For the first time, I didn’t feel threatened in a man’s embrace. I suppose it was that moment that I decided I would keep this kind, empathetic man.

Still hugging, I heard a cough from behind Tom. I peeked under Tom’s elbow to see Bruce, eyebrows raised, questioning us. I ducked from gods embrace and straightened my shirt, flushed that we were caught in a compromising position. 

“We were… I mean, you caught us at a bad time. No, not like that,” I internally berated myself, cursing my blubbering. 

I looked up to see Tom, a smirk on his handsome face, then turned to Bruce to see him laughing.

“Ellie, in all my years, never have I seen you so flustered. And never over a guy. I say you keep this one,” Bruce smiled and I knew my reputation was still stellar in his book.

He walked up to Tom, put a hand on his shoulder and said, “Son, you keep her out of trouble. Got it?”

Tom looked down at me and smiled, which caused my stomach to do a stupid flip, “ I plan on it.”

I raised an eyebrow, “Do I get a say in this?”

“In love?” Bruce asked. “Not one little word. I know you’re used to controlling everything, but I’m afraid, my dear, that you have no control over this.”

Tom slid an arm around my shoulder, and I made a face, “Wow, real classy. And who ever said I was in love?”

Bruce looked me in the eye, “You’ve never brought a guy to the club in all your years here, so I figured you must be sweet on him. Plus, not every guy would slam a lamp into my very drunk doorman to rescue his gal.”

“Who said I needed rescuing?”

“Ellie, you need to stop being so indignant. If you want more proof, it’s all in the way you look at each other, like he’ll bring you the moon and like you’re his whole world. I know this is sudden, but sometimes, you have to have a little faith.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, so I said nothing. Bruce looked at me one more time before dragging his now unconscious doorman into a dressing room and locking the door. Then he strolled past us, whistling the tune to one of  my songs.

How did I let this happen? Now, Tom and I were completely alone, and I didn’t know what was going to happen next. Would it be weird? How would he react?

I looked into Tom’s eyes, and he kissed me before I knew what was happening. It was nice, I thought, to know that someone liked me, but it was so improper. 

I pushed away, “Thomas! We can’t do that! We only just met today!”

He looked me straight in the eye, “It feels like I’ve known you a lifetime.”

He swooped down again, but hesitated, “I just need to know if you want this, want me, the same way I want you.”

It was in that moment that I realized Tom was, quite possibly, the only person on this earth who cared for me this much, who respected me and my opinions. I knew I would forever regret not seeing where this was going, so I closed the gap and melded my lips with his, sealing my fate as well as his.