It's Over - Over and Over Again

He sat back in his Lazy Boy chair listening to the crackle of the fire. He closed his eyes thinking, “Damn, life is good.” In a few hours the kids would be arriving for Christmas dinner, the first time the gang was all together in what felt like forever. 

Click, click, click in walked Marilyn all dressed and ready for the festivities. She looked … well, she looked spectacular. 

“Honey, is that a new dress? I don’t remember seeing that one before?” He asked, looking at her appreciatively. 

She stared at him. Unsmiling. 

A terrible feeling washed over him. Something was definitely wrong.

“Honey?” He tentatively prompted her for an answer.

“I want a divorce,” she stated without blinking an eye, without her voice wavering in the slightest. A straightforward arrow shooting across the cozy den stabbing him in the chest with perfect precision.

He was dumbfounded. A divorce? Surely life has its ups and downs but that’s life by definition. You don’t end a marriage at the drop of a hat, on Christmas Day no less, with the family arriving in a few hours. Was this a joke? A terrible cruel example of twisted humor?

“You can’t be serious.” He finally heard words leave his mouth.

“See, that’s exactly the problem,” she said her cheeks turning red, her face finally showing emotion.

“What does that mean?”

“You said I can’t be serious. You don’t take me seriously. You couldn’t care less about me. I’m just here in the background of your life.”

“That’s not true!” He jumped up out of his Lazy Boy chair ready for battle.

“Really?  Name one thing I do for myself.”

“You go to work.”

“Oh, that’s for me? You think that’s enjoyable somehow? What do I do at work? Name one coworker. Just one.”

He was blank. She was a receptionist in a realtor’s office, leaving each morning at 8:25 and returning at 5:35. Sometimes she returned home with leftovers from dinner that her boss treated her to. Her boss, shit, what was her name again? He knew it. Obviously he knew it. He just couldn’t remember. She was making him nervous; he couldn’t think while she was glaring at him like that.

“You’re being ridiculous,” he shouted at her. “The kids are going to be here in a few hours. Can’t we have a nice day?”

“Oh, now I’m ridiculous. Thanks for the compliment.” She left the room returning moments later in her coat holding her travel bag. “I’m leaving. Turn off the oven at 3:00. Enjoy.”

She was gone. 

Gone. Gone on Christmas Day? She left him? Left him on Christmas Day.

Turn off the oven at 3:00? He blindly walked into the kitchen. The table was set festively for the family minus one. The lack of her place setting was proof that she had no intention of being at the family dinner. She didn’t even put something down as a replacement. Not a plant, a bowl, a candy dish, just a void at the other end of the table across from his seat. He would be staring into nothing with his family on either side.

He thought back to the travel bag she was holding, obviously a trip planned, not a spontaneous decision. That dress she wore for her announcement. Where was she going dressed like that? His heart began to beat faster, the blood pumping loudly in his ears, sweat forming on his forehead. What the fuck did she think she was doing? The anger was rising quickly. 

***

He sat back in his Lazy Boy chair listening to the crackle of the fire. He closed his eyes thinking, “Damn, life is good.” In a few hours the kids would be arriving for Christmas dinner, the first time the gang was all together in ages. The grandkids were getting so big, soon they would be starting school and making new friends. It was important that the family stays close for as long as possible.

Marilyn walked in, interrupting his thoughts. She was all dressed and ready for the festivities. She looked … well, she looked spectacular. 

“Honey, is that a new dress? I don’t remember seeing that one before?” He asked, looking at her appreciatively. 

She stared at him. Unsmiling. 

“I want a divorce,” she blurted out. 

***

He sat back in his Lazy Boy chair listening to the crackle of the fire. He closed his eyes thinking, “Damn, life is good.” In a few hours the kids would be arriving for Christmas dinner, the first time the gang was all together in what felt like forever. He was particularly excited this year with the news of his first grandchild due to arrive in the spring. He smiled, imagining the little bundle being placed into his arms for the very first time. Would it be a boy to carry on the family name or a girl to spoil while hopelessly wrapped around her little finger? A child is a blessing, and his life has been so blessed already. He was indeed a lucky man. 

In walked Marilyn wearing her sweats carrying her gym bag. That was odd, he thought, feeling unsettled. Why go to the gym now?

“Honey, off the gym now? Aren’t you supposed to go after you stuff yourself silly?” 

She stared at him. Unsmiling. 

A terrible feeling washed over him. Something was definitely wrong.

“Honey?”

“I want a divorce,” she stated without blinking an eye, without her voice wavering in the slightest. Just a straightforward arrow shooting across the cozy den until it stabbed him in the heart.

***

He sat back, taking his glasses off and rubbing his eyes, sighing. It had been a long day. The kids left taking their bags of gifts, cookies, and merry wishes with them. He was back in the den finally alone with his thoughts. And the situation at hand. The Divorce. With a capital D.

Now what?

He had never gone through anything like this. His parents were the perfect role models for marriage, he had always imagined the happily ever after following “I do.” What does a middle-aged man do after his wife abruptly announces her plans for divorce? Were there signs he had missed over the years? Was it his fault? When did the dissatisfaction appear or was it always there silently growing like a cancer?

Lost in thought he was startled when Jill’s voice crept into his contemplation. It took him a while to realize she had been trying to get his attention. Putting his glasses back on he looked at his wife standing in the doorway. 

“You ok, hun? You don’t seem yourself today.” She came over and sat down on the arm of his Lazy Boy.

He patted her leg and answered, “Just stuck in my edits. I’ve been working on the same chapter over and over again trying to get it right.”

“Ah. A bit of writer’s block? Anything I can help you with?”

“Not this time.” For Jill knew nothing of divorce; she was as happily married as he was. Or was she? Didn’t his character believe that his wife was happily married also?

A feeling of dread came over him as he pictured Jill walking in with her travel bag announcing she was leaving him. He looked at her carefully. She looked content but one never really knows what is going on inside another person’s heart.

“The chapter can wait.” He stood up and reached for his wife’s hand. “Let’s have a glass of wine, maybe catch something good on TV?” 

He smiled at his wife. He wasn’t taking any chances of life imitating art.