The boat was a bit delayed. I mean, it’s a huge ship so I suppose that’s understandable. My sister and her husband had gone on the biggest ship in the world, the Titanic. I saw her off and it was humongous. Archie, her husband, was very rich and got them tickets. I loved my sister, but she was gone for ever and I couldn’t wait for her to be back. But after forever, it was still delayed. Until, one day, while I was waiting by the docks, my sister came to port. Not in the Titanic, but in a small rescue boat.
As soon as I saw her, all cold and shaky, I jumped into the water without a second thought. I was a strong swimmer as Miriam and I had always swum when we were little. And still now. However, it was strange, because she seemed to fear the water and refused to swim, so I towed the boat to shore. Once we landed she stumbled into my arms, shaking and just clinging to me like I was the only thing tying her to life. Slowly, we hobbled home getting many strange glances from those in the street. Perhaps they thought her to be drunk? Whatever the case, no one bothered us.
Once home, I sat her down at the kitchen table and cooked some food. In her state, I thought to cook her favourite meal, chicken and parsnips and sweet potato. Our mum always used to make it for us. She slowly ate it and slowly, a tint of pink returned to her cheeks. Once she was finished, she tried to wash the dish.
“It’s ok, I’ve got it,” I said and washed the dish. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” I took her upstairs to the ensuite bathroom. “Have a shower and call me when your done.” She simply nodded and stepped in. I heard the water turn on. After about 5 seconds I heard a thud.
“Miriam, are you okay?” I asked. After not getting a response, I start to get worried. I stand up and walk to the door. “Miriam, I’m coming in.” I opened the door and there, on the floor, sobbing and shaking, was my sister. I leapt down to her and held her.
“Shhhh, it’s ok,” I muttered soothingly, stroking her hair. “Everything is all right.” She turned around, not even bothering about how close we were, and flung her arms around me. I held her tight as she sobbed. I walked her over to my bed and we sat down. After a bit of crying, she was all dried out.
“What’s wrong, sister?” I asked. “Where is that big boat Archie took you on?” At the mention of Archie (or the boat) she whimpered.
“Well, everything was really good. Archie is rich and got us premium tickets. We had a lovely ensuite with a floral bed with a wooden bed head that had the most lovely carvings in it. And a bath tub with hot water that had an option to shoot out water. It was lovely. We were eating lunch, a lovely meal of bread, cheese and some sort of fish, when the ship shuddered. Then there was screaming. Women wailing, children crying and men running, yelling at everyone. Archie rushed me to a boat. He tried to get more onto it, but the ropes undid and it went down into the water. Many boats were sent down with women and children. And then, there was singing coming from the Titanic. The men were all singing, arms around shoulders. I could see Archie and he smiled and winked at me. Then, it sunk. The water was so cold, the weather so bitter. Many boats headed towards wherever but I knew the way home so I headed this way. It was perilous and sad and I had much to much time to think. And the water. Whenever I think of water or am near it, all I can think is…” She went silent. I thought it over. The Titanic was meant to be unsinkable, the most famous ship in the world. Now I understood. She was in fear of the water, scared of it happening again or the memories or perhaps both and more. I clutched my sister tight.
“It’s ok, they’re all ok. In a better place. And you’re home! You’re home, Miriam, safe with me,” I said. After that she silently cried (so apparently, she did have some more tears left to give.) After a while she stopped and sat up. I went to hold her. She politely declined.
“I’m ok, I’m ok,” she muttered. She started to walk down the stairs and I followed, walking so I could catch her should she collapse. I sat down at the table per to Miriam’s direction. She began to cook, a soup our mum used to make it for us. It was really good and tasted like home. We sat there and made small talk about the petty gossip going on. We sat and talked until Miriam said “Hey do you think I could live with you.” I opened my mouth in surprise.
“It’s ok, I don’t have to. I just didn’t want to be alone at Archie’s house,” she rushed on. I noted how she didn’t say her house.
“No, I have no problem with you living with me. In fact, I’m thrilled. I’ve wanted to live with you for years, remember? But Archie had that mansion. So yes, I’d love it. I was only surprised you wanted to.” She hugged me and thanked me. She began to get the dishes to clean up.
“It’s ok, you cooked, I’ll clean.” And so I began on the dishes while Miriam sat and watched. After, we went into the living room and played a board game like when we were nine. All was good. We had chips and chocolate and some tv played in the background. After, we went to bed. I had a spare, but without talking, we both walked to mine and slept like when we were children.
It took a while, but Miriam got better. After she had coped with it, she got interviewed. And we lived together, cooking and cleaning in a symbiotic sister relationship. And all was well.
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2 comments
I like your story and the sisterly relationship was written well. Some tips would be to do more show not tell and some suspense. Showing is describing things and really getting inside someone’s head. Instead of saying “it was horrible” you’d say “The sounds of people screaming rang through the freezing air as the ship creaked and groaned and began sinking slowly, further into the dark waters.” Suspense makes the reader guess what may or may not happen, which helps them get more involved with the story. Slowly describe the situation so ...
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Thank you. I will use that advice well :)
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