A Questionable Partner

A Questionable Partner

“Doug, what are you doing here in Coleridge dressed like a professor?”

“Gina! I'm surprised to see you, too. And I'm dressed this way because I AM the professor.”

“Of a creative writing class at a small college?”

“You didn’t know?”

“No one told me you would be working this case.”

“That's weird. Why would they leave you out of the loop on something that important?”

“Maybe because I told them I didn’t want to work with you anymore.”

“You did what? Since when?”

“Since I blame you for my broken leg on our last job.”

“You blame me? I wasn’t even with you when it happened.”

“Believe me, I know. You had your nose so deep in that poker game, you didn’t pay any attention to the fact that the local mine had caved in with me in it.”

“Hey, I got a lot of helpful information from that poker game. Won some money, too.”

“Yeah, you were probably raking it in while I was trying to drag two injured miners from the wreckage. Bet you bought rounds for everybody in the saloon.”

“No way, I kept all the winnings for investment. I have to look out for the future, after all. You never know what the next day will bring.”

“Oh, right, something dangerous, like being a professor at a small-town college. Just what did you get besides winnings from that poker game, anyway? The bosses were all raving about the outcome. You came up a real hero. All I got was a broken leg.”

“The firm used the information I got to recover a payroll worth fifty thousand dollars from a bank robbery. The bank was very generous in its finder’s fee.”

“They found that money then. Everyone thought it had been buried in the mine, so I got that schtich."

"You weren't any good at poker."

"Humph. You may have scored on that one, but you didn’t cover me when you should have. You get so involved in your own thing you forgot you had a partner. You aren’t the easiest person to work with, you know.”

“Moi? Come on. I’m sharp, experienced, quick on the uptake, and have a good sense of humor, not to mention good-looking. What could possibly make you say I’m hard to work with?”

“Besides your ego, you mean? You often make rash decisions without consulting me, especially when it comes to historical eras.”

“Well, I admit, I may not always be at my best on the time travel cases.”

“You’re admitting it? I’m astounded!”

“I did make a few mistakes.”

“You always rushed into a situation without doing your homework. Like the time you charged into a gladiator training camp and found only women. Oh, the expression on your face! You didn’t listen when I told you Rome had female gladiators.”

“Uh, yeah, that was an interesting time. Damn, I never saw so many ugly women in one place.”

“I never understood why you thought a gladiator stole Nero’s favorite painting.”

“Motive and opportunity. Besides, it was a hunch.”

“A hunch that almost got your neck broken. I laughed myself sick when that woman twisted you up in knots before throwing you out on your toga.”

“A lot of help you were!”

“You wouldn’t have wanted a woman helping you anyway, not in front of her. Besides, I thought it was good payback for the time you let those Caribbean pirates throw me overboard.”

“I was protecting you. I didn’t want them to find out you were a woman. I knew how close we were to port and that you could easily swim to shore.”

“So glad you had all that confidence in me. What about the time you left me in Versailles when the mob was looting Marie Antoinette’s chambers and I was trying to find her diamond necklace?”

“I told you the stupid guards blocked me when I tried to get through to you. I didn’t worry too much, though. You always have a knack for getting out of trouble. But back to the present. Would have taken this job if you’d known I would be your partner?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. I was getting bored after so much time in rehab, especially once I got the cast off. And I figured working on a college campus should be fairly safe. I’m not so sure of that now with you involved, though. Really, you as a professor?”

“Come on. I look the part, don’t I? I feel pretty spiffy.”

“I have to admit, the nicely trimmed beard does make you look more professional. Is it real?”

“You know it isn’t.”

“Yeah, I didn’t think you could grow one so fast; however, it looks good. But what do you know of creative writing, and how did you get to my hometown?”

“I boned up for the course when I got the assignment and will wing it when I have to. What do you mean your hometown?”

“Coleridge is supposed to be my original hometown that I’ve just moved back to.”

“So, you are taking this class?”

“I’m afraid so. That’s disappointing. I hoped I was going to learn something in order to write the Great American Novel.”

“Ha, ha. That is rich. You learn something? Are you going to annoy me as a student?”

“Every chance I get.”

“Oops, here come the other students for the class. We better drop this conversation for now. What name are you going by this time?”

“Sheila.”

“All right, Sheila. You know, of course, that I am Professor Johnson.”

“Oh, of course, Professor. How could I forget?”

***

“Well, Professor Johnson, the time in your class went by fast. I found it very interesting and even learned a few things. I may write that novel, after all. Thank you for the A, by the way.”

“Certainly, Sheila, you definitely earned it, in more ways than one.”

“I must say your teaching skill surprised me. I thought the primary assignment was a clever one. By asking the students to write about a piece of jewelry that attracted their attention while shopping in a pawnshop or an antique store, made a fascinating subject. I'll bet you got a lot of fascinating stories from that assignment. And what a way to get a bunch of people to search for our missing bracelet! It was genius. Thirty students raiding all those stores at the same time created a brilliant cover for my investigation.”

“That’s what I hoped. Naturally, since you had the description of the bracelet in question, it made it easier. We did get lucky, though. The research team did a good job of ultimately tracking the bracelet’s travels here to Coleridge. What I can’t figure out, though, is why the firm was hesitant about letting us know ahead of time we would be working together on this case.”

“Perhaps they were really worried I would turn the job down because of you, or maybe they weren’t sure I was mentally ready after the injury. I’m glad I signed on, though. It was fun. I even learned some new things about you.”

“Oh yeah? I hope I improved my standing in your eyes. Think we might do it again?”

“Not if you try to get me killed again!”

“No more time travel, then. I always felt out of my league on those cases. You were the history expert.”

“Thanks for letting me know I’m an expert in something in your eyes.”

“Don’t I tell you often enough what a good partner you are?”

“Not enough, no. You can never tell me that too often."

“Then let’s go back to my professor’s apartment, celebrate our success at solving the case by opening a bottle of champagne and snuggling on the couch, and I will tell you again.”

“Delightful idea, but it makes me sad to think this might be the last case we will work together.”

“Never work together again? Are you still unsure about being my partner again?”

“I don’t think the powers that be will allow it once they know we are married.”

“Huh, they don’t have to know. We'll continue to be discreet.”

“I’m afraid discreet is no longer an option, Professor Johnson. Congratulations, you’re going to be a father.”