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Creative Nonfiction Friendship Speculative

‘But, what matters, matters. Right?’

‘Well, not really.’

‘You mean, it does.’

‘I have said otherwise.’

‘Exactly. You too are like others around the town who say one thing but mean the other. By the way, you don’t really have to worry about it. It’s an ephemeral niche these days, one that many pine for.’

‘ Aha. To say it blue but to mean otherwise?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Well, that’s quite a speculation.’

‘ Indeed. My apt speculation is the only thing that my sister used to mention twice at the dinner table.’

‘Why so?’

‘Well primarily because she has this habit of mentioning everything twice which she utterly condemns the very existence of.

One day when I went to her room after dinner, she was dancing to this verse:

Twice and thrice don’t mean to me

Only, once I deem of worth alone

For once I knew not who I was

And still, I know not why I dance

Well, you see. She has a different perspective on things. She mentions it with poignancy, once to condemn it’s very existence and twice to substantiate the former.’

‘But if thought through Orang, the very condemnation also demands a fair share of speculation, doesn’t it?’

‘You too?’

‘What?’

‘You didn’t get it too.’

‘Listen. She likes to speculate. She just does not like the idea of me speculating. In fact, there was a time when she wanted to be a speculative intellectual. Though I brought it to her notice more than once that intellectuals are necessarily speculative. But she was so bent on saying the same. I on the other hand became a ‘thing’ only a bit shy of a glut of dead grass like the one we are sitting on right now.’

‘Are you saying that…’

‘Exactly.’

‘Why would you…’

‘Listen Doc, before you treat me. You yourself need to be treated?’

‘What for? Why would I…’

‘That for. You are utterly aposiopesis-ridden.’

‘And that’s quite very rude of you to put it out like that.’

‘Like what?’

‘Like as it is.’

‘You mean I should first slather my comment with a layer of sweet humor, then add to it yet another layer of ambient hospitality, cherry top it with the most pleasant words, and then have it parceled at your doorstep at a time when the sun is at stark resistance against a thousand hearts which clearly do not want it to sink down too soon? You thoroughly enjoyed it, right?’

‘How do you know it?’

‘Because you didn’t laugh.’

‘Well not laughing means otherwise, doesn’t it?’

‘My grandma used to say that those who do not laugh over any joke or pun should be convicted of stealthy pleasure.’

‘Stealthy pleasure. Yes. By the way, what were you saying about you becoming something like a bit shy of dead grass.’

‘Aaaah.Yes. So, it started bugging me.’

‘The idea that your sister wanted to call it speculative intellectual?

Yes. Until one day, when I divulged before her the reason why men are always preceded with ‘gentle’, while ladies are not?’

‘And, what do you think exactly is the reason?’

‘Listen. It is quite obvious. They don’t say gentle ladies because they don’t say red blood or wet water either. It was then that she quite liked the idea and stopped saying it. You know what Doc, this is about a year ago. Even though she has ceased the very habit of preceding intellectual with speculative, blood with red, water with wet, and for that matter ladies with gentle, I started observing a different contour around my personality as she stuck by it initially. I do not exactly know what really bugged me doc. It sort of tickled my cognition, to the extent that it became an irritating comfort for my brain. The idea of unnecessarily coupling two words became my pet peeve. It might sound odd to you….no wait. How can it ever sound odd to you? You are my doc and you understand me like no one else does. Believe me doc, that’s the only reason why I am here in this hospital. They think I go crazy but I don’t. It is just that when I think about the very phenomenon it brings me down to being anything but myself.’

‘Listen Orang. Let’s think through it. You are a wise human.’

‘I like that.’

‘Like what?’

‘The oxymoron.’

‘Wise human?’

‘Yes. So, you see I do not have a problem with oxymorons. They don’t seem to tickle my cognition, but the phenomenon that I have explained earlier does put me ill at ease.’

‘Is there a specific name of the very literary device Orang.’

‘Yes there is. Let me see.’

‘Wait. Why are you always carrying this dictionary of literary devices with you? What use could it be of at a place like this where you should rather have a predilection for the dirge of sad birds and the rustling of leaves.’

‘Just out of habit Doc. Sometimes, I feel like it saves me by giving me a thousand different ways to be creative but I don’t know why, I can’t help recalling that particular idea incessantly.’

‘Orang? What problem exactly do you have with it? Come on tell me and stop looking at me like that.’

‘Like what?’

‘Like bulleting your gaze to me through the apertures of your revelatory eyes. Stop it I’m saying. Fine that you have already explained it to me but what if I ask you to cage the reason for me in a single word?’

‘Improvidence.’

‘That was spontaneous. Improvidence.’

‘Yes. It feels as if people are being just as much thriftless with words as they already are with material wealth. Where one may suffice they necessarily need two, maybe only out of the habit of conspicuous consumption. It incites me to lose my senses and render them with a heavy heart to anything that I chance upon.’

‘Listen Orang. You are fine now. Your sister pays me a visit daily and asks to discharge you. ‘

‘The very habit already has increased my emotional receptivity and I can’t seem to take it anymore Doc. Please ask her to let me be wherever I am.’

‘You know Orang, your sister is admitted in the same hospital as yours.’

‘Wait. What For?’

‘She is taking therapy on how not to go back on her promise of not bugging you. The doctors say that she has it embedded in the inner recesses of her cognition.’

‘The habit?’

‘Yes. But the good thing is that its curable. Therapists are working really hard on her. She has vowed not to do it again consciously and says that she would never go back on her promise.’

‘Dear Orang. Can You please meet her one time?’

‘Where is she?’

‘Right behind you. Don’t worry she is with her therapist.’

‘Fine then.’

‘Sabrina. I missed you dearly. Hug me tight.’

‘I missed you more Orang. Don’t worry I will not bug you again, for you are my only brother. Here, meet my therapist; Kian.’

‘Hey, Kian. You have done a wonderful job, haven’t you? ‘

‘Actually, I believe in performing my duty to the fullest Orang. It renders me a fair share of peace. Moreover, you see, it multiplies one’s intellect up to the very level of those who have pruned their sense and sensibility through secluded solitude.’

‘Aaaaaaaahhhh Doctor. The latter, the latter.’

February 25, 2023 03:46

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