15 comments

Happy Sad Suspense

" It had been twenty-four years she'd last seen it, but the place looked exactly the same , and end it with, " [.......] and that was all that mattered" . Aruni was standing infront of a burnt place. It was her birth place where she lived with her family. Aruni was looking at a photo. She ran into her memories. ‘’ After finishing my work I hurriedly packed my bags and got into the bus to go to my village. The bus was crowded to pack. As the New Year is coming it was difficult to go on the bus. During the New Year session people goes to their villages. In a haste conductor was hurriedly collecting the money through the crowd. With much difficulty I put my hand into the purse and got some money. I’m going to my village after six years. I’m very excited to see my ill father , my mother , my younger sister and my brother. They will be very content when I show them the presents that I bought them. After a long time I can get together with them and celebrate avurudu. I can taste the avurudu kavili which are made by my mother. I can still remember the smell of kavum , kokis , aluwa etc. ‘’ Aruni was remembering her dark past , her unhappy story. At that time her father used to pluck coconuts and her mother used to make hoppers and she sold them to the boutique in our village. The income her parents got from their work were sufficient for their daily needs. Her younger sister , brother and Aruni went to the same college in their village. Aruni remembers how she used to be a punching bag for students during her school time. She had a good patience to tolerate. Aruni’s aim is to have a good education and to support her family. She remembers how they have suffered when there were not enough food or clothes ‘’ Even though we were destitute at that time our lives were simple and we were content with what we had’’. Aruni was the eldest child in her family. Her parents had lots of hopes on her. 


Her parents always thought that their poverty will come to an end on the day when Aruni become an educated lady. One evening her father was late , through the darkness she saw four men carrying his father. Her father had broken his leg while plucking coconuts. From that onwards her family didn’t had sufficient money to spend for their needs. Aruni even had to stop going to school. Even though there were hardships , she somehow sent her brother and sister to the school. As her family spent most of the money to her father’s medicine , day by day their lives were getting hard. Like other village girls she also found a work in Colombo. She worked in a small tailor shop in there and she sent some money to her family. In the New Year she came to her village. She got down from the village bus. ‘’ I can smell the familiar scent of the air’’. She can still remember the beauty of the village. ‘’ I heard the sound of the water rushing through streams and the swarm of bees. By seeing the pleasant environment in my village sweet and pleasant thoughts crossed in my mind. The tiredness that I’m having from my journey was gone away with the fresh wind. I was passing the fresh green fields with the remembrances of my parents’’. She was walking in a dark place , she saw two boys picking cashew nuts , dry leaves of the trees were fallen and the light was slowly penetrating through them.


When she was passing the cemetery of the village , she saw a bunch of people. Among the crowd she saw her younger sister. ‘’Hoping that my whole family would be there she kept the bags under a tree and reached towards the crowd’’. She saw only her brother and sister. She was happy to see how they had been grown up. She saw that they were crying near two coffins. My younger sister saw me and ran towards me saying that our parents have left the world. For a while Aruni couldn’t speak , she couldn’t hear anything. She got fainted , for a moment she was unconscious. When she was awakened, she was in her relative’s house. Her brother began to tell her the story. The neighbor next to Aruni’s house was a rich man. One day he had scolded Aruni’s mother and he had broken their fence blaming her mother that she is trying to get their land also. But her mother mended the fence again. One day her mother was walking in the night with the help of the moonlight. Slowly , four men has came behind her mother. While walking on that day her mother has suddenly stopped. She felt something hard hit on her back. She has felt like her head is bursting. She touched at the back of his head and turned back , then she realized that one man has hit her on her head. She was unconscious and fell on the ground. On that night her mother was found by one her relatives. Aruni’s brother has informed about the incident to the police. The main culprit in this incident was their rich neighbor.


On the same day some men came to their house and has set fire to their newly built house which was built with the help of Aruni’s money Because of the fire incident . Her mother saved her brother and sister but she was unable to save her father. After all these incidents now Aruni had to look after her sister and brother. As she had experience in working in a tailor shop in Colombo she started to sew clothes in her relative’s house. With the income that she got by sewing clothes she built a small house and now her house has become her tailor shop.


‘’ Akka , what are you doing ? , I’m getting late’’ , Aruni woke from her dreams because of her sister’s voice. Today is the first day her sister goes to the University. Through all hardships she has managed to fulfill all her responsibilities for her family 



November 16, 2020 11:46

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15 comments

10:51 Nov 27, 2020

Good narrative

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15:38 Nov 27, 2020

Thank you😀

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21:51 Nov 25, 2020

I really like the story but there were some grammatical errors.

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01:35 Nov 26, 2020

Thank you😊. Yeah I too noticed it after the contest was over😂. So I didn't bother to correct them.

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08:22 Nov 26, 2020

Lol :) Still a good story

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10:30 Nov 26, 2020

Thank you😊

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Kylie Rudolf
17:50 Nov 24, 2020

I loved the ending! A dream?! This was really touching story!

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02:48 Nov 25, 2020

Thank you😊. It is not a dream. Aruni is recalling her past😃

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Philip Clayberg
01:56 Nov 22, 2020

I liked your story, even though it had its unpleasant moments. The description of events is very vivid (which helps since I've only seen Sri Lanka in videos; I've never been there in-person). At first I thought it was an extended dream, but then after a few rereads, it didn't seem like a dream anymore. I think I understand what's going on now: Aruni is remembering what life was like in her birth-village 24 years earlier. It's been a hard life. She's lost her father and her family's home, her mother was almost killed, her father died ...

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10:31 Nov 22, 2020

Yes, the story is like that. Thank you for your feedback😃

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Philip Clayberg
18:15 Nov 22, 2020

You're welcome. I confess that at first I didn't quite understand what were memories of the past (memories, not dreams) and what was present-day for the narrator. But a few rereads helped clarify things.

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19:14 Nov 22, 2020

Yeah I wrote like that. Actually I intended to write like that. In my story i dealt with the past and present of Aruni's life.

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Philip Clayberg
20:06 Nov 22, 2020

Maybe you could break up the paragraphs so that a reader saw it as more of a story, rather than like an entry in the narrator's diary. Unless, of course, you *want* it to be like a diary entry. In which case, it reads fine as is.

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06:33 Nov 23, 2020

Ok thank you for your suggestion😃. .

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