Desperate Remedies

Desperate Remedies 

"Beep! Beep! Beep!" 

I awake to a familiar sound and a familiar sight. A messy room lit up with the light from sunrise and a fucking ANNOYING alarm that won't shut up. 

"Beep! Beep!" 

"click" 

I turn it off and look at the time...shit im going to be late! I immediately got up, got dressed in a button up shirt, denim jeans and sneakers then bolted out the door as fast as my feet could carry me. I ran to my car...SHIIIIIIIIT! I forgot my fucking keys...are you kidding me? I ran back to my apartment and made sure to lock the door and back to the car. I hopped in and started the car, my lungs were on fire, head pounding, but I was alive and, on my way, to work. I sped into the parking lot of Theo's tech services and parked next to Sherri. She's usually a good sport even if I do a shitty job parking next to her car. I sprinted toward the door and scanned my card then ran inside. 

"Hey Mary!" 

"Hey Kiara!" 

I ran to the elevator and took it to my floor and ran straight to my booth where...shit. 

"Mary! You're late!" 

"Yea I know Theo I" 

"Just get to work." Theo sad begrudgingly as he walked away. 

"See you had fun last night?" 

"Hey Doug." 

"You sleep well? Or did you sleep...WELL!?" 

"I slept alright I just didn't wake up well." 

"Doug leave her be you know how she is in the morning while dealing with a hangover." 

"Fine!" 

"Thanks." I said as Doug walked away. 

"So, another night at the bar huh?" 

"What? Just having some fun. "I tried to do a goofy gesture but stopped when I noticed Sherri's expression dropped. 

"Have you looked into the therapist list I sent you?" 

"Sherri please I'm fine I don't need therapy don't have the time nor money for it." 

"(Sigh) If you say so." She says while rolling her eyes and walking away. 

"OH! One more thing. Button up your shirt!" Fuck that is embarrassing I did not notice that. The day goes by I answer tech support questions in my booth until five in the afternoon after which I leave and head to Andy's, a local bar down the street. Heh therapy? I wish Sherri would just shut up about it already I do not need to pay someone to sit and have a one-way conversation with me. 

"Give me to margaritas and about three shots of jack Daniels." 

"Drinking hard again huh?" 

"Don't worry about it." And so, I started drinking I started with the three shots and then the margaritas but, as I was halfway through one a man came. 

"Well, aren't you a pretty thing what are you doing all alone on a night like this? Mind if I pay for your drinks?" 

"Sorry not interested." I could tell from his face he was going to be trouble and I was already buzzed so I decided to give up on more drinks. 

"Hey Lee give me the bill time to leave." Lee nodded and gave me the bill, I payed it and left. 

"Hey!" I turn to see the man from the bar running toward me then..."WHACK!" 

"I wake up freezing cold, but naked in a tub full of ice. I-I couldn't even move the only thing I could do was stand there frozen. Finally, I decided to get out and look around to see what...happened to me. I happened upon a mirror and noticed dried blood on top of a crude stitch. Feet numb, I looked around for a weapon but ended up putting a whole bunch of ice in one of the plastic bags under the sink. I slowly opened the door to see an empty hotel room I searched for my clothes but, couldn't find them finally I decided to put on some sheets and left the hotel room and knocked on the door next to me as hard as I could it opened to a stunned face but, luckily they were patient enough to listen to me. I was brought into the station where I recounted what happened it honestly it wasn't until I called Sherri that I started to fall apart and finally cry.  

I called Sherri and she came and drove me home. The car...was dead silent I didn’t want to talk, and I guess Sherri could tell which is why she didn’t say anything. I got home and Sherri helped me into my apartment and then my bed. She even asked if I wanted her to spend the night, I told her no didn’t want to burden her any further. When she left, I immediately tried to sleep but...I couldn’t sleep, not a wink. I-I had to do something to calm my nerves I feel like I’m going crazy. So, I went for the only thing I could think of to calm me down a nice cold glass of hard liquor. I poured one cup but, as I thought it wasn’t enough, so I poured another cup, then another...then...another eventually I downed the whole cup. Usually, I’m pretty conscious about how many drinks I’ve had. This time. This time was different, I didn’t notice the bottle was empty until no liquor came out. I tried to go back to sleep but couldn’t, so I got back up and got dressed. There were only ten, maybe a bar somewhere was still open. I was about to leave until I stopped. It was almost as if every fiber in my body didn’t want to go back outside. Even my hands and knees were shaking the more I moved toward the door. In the end I... chose not to go back out I went to bed and stared at the ceiling until morning came. 

I wanted to go back to work but I couldn’t I... called out of course Theo yelled at me as usual I... hung up on. I stayed in my house for about three more days just...existing watching tv and I barely ate. I didn’t understand what was wrong with me. I mean I just felt...empty nothing on the tv piqued my interest. Then IT happened. I think on the night of the third day I went to my usual spot fully dressed and even had my face covered. Andy saw me but I don’t know whether he knew it was me under there or night. I asked for three bottles of Hennesy, two bottles of Jack Daniels and one bottle of Smirnoff. Enough to last me until the end of time I thought. I was standing there waiting quietly until a man came out of nowhere. 

“Hey uh...my name’s Jack I.” 

“Sorry! Not interested.” I said shaking I honestly almost screamed when surprised me. 

“Oh, uh my apologies.”  

“D-Don’t worry about it.” 

“Here you are miss will that be cash or card?” 

“Cash please!” I handed the cash, grabbed my bag of alcohol, and bolted out of there like a bat out of hell. 

“Hey Miss!” I heard a voice come from behind a... man's voice then...I blacked out. I remember screaming “STAY BACK!” as loud as I could then he was on the floor, his head bleeding. I ran from the scene as fast as my legs could carry me. I left my car and just ran back to my apartment. I closed the door behind me and just cried into my arms for what felt like hours. Then I decided to give Sherri a call. 

"Hey Sherri, can you send me that list of therapists again?" 

"Sure." 

And... that’s how I got here...talking to you.