Shared Water: by Annie
Lana stood on her dock looking across the miniature lake or Pond at the other side. She kind of shrugged her tan shoulders and twisted up her long braid and slipped the elastic band around it. It was too warm to have hair hanging on her neck even if it was a braid. She picked up the handles of the wheel barrow and pushed the plants and tools out near her Patio. She smiled at her little cottage with the vines that twisted about the banister of the deck. She loved the bright yellow she had chosen to paint the cottage. It looked like the color of happiness. She giggled out loud answering her own thoughts “Yes if happiness was a color” She Liked the vines of yellow banks roses she had cleaned out and fertilized. Someone had loved these plants at one time but not recently. If they were going to be here much longer, they needed to be tilled, trimmed and fed. The lavender morning glories twisted through the 3-and-a-half-foot tall picket fence. It all looked so perfect now that she had moved in and put in the time it took to bring it to where she knew she could get it. It was her own personal fairy tale. The lavender Adirondack chairs were in a semi-circle around the fire pit. Sure, Lavender wasn’t a common color for patio furniture but it looked perfect. It was a lot calmer than her other choice which was lemon yellow. To the left side of the patio was an ancient old oak with a rope and bench swing. She spent hours twining ribbon and vines down the ropes and it indeed looked like a fairy land for a little girl. She smiled as she sat on the yellow pillow, she had fastened to the white wooden swing bench. “Well,” she said out loud “If I want to decorate it like an enchanted doll house then I will. I paid for it, that means Its mine.” She giggled as she raised her feet and smiled. It was her dream and she finally had it. She kind of frowned at the other house across the pond It looked like a falling down boys club house. Such an eyesore. But at least it remained an unused hovel and it wasn’t a watering hole for a bunch of good old boys. Her worst fear was that the resident was a potbellied un bathed middle aged bum. Her thoughts were interrupted by a huge tanker truck that pulled up and threw two huge pipes into the pond. She jumped up and got on her bicycle and peddled for all she was worth around the pond. There stood a middle-aged man in a three-piece suit. He looked in good health, no pot belly or un trimmed beard. “What’s with the truck man. Are you dumping something in my water?” he took at the 5’5” blond with her barbie smile and hairdo. “Ugh listen Barbie, its half my water and I am indeed putting something in that water. She read the side of the truck “Trout farm! Oh lordy! are you filling my pretty pond with fish?” He burst out laughing at her now pink flushed face “Just my half honey, don’t worry, I am sure they will take one look at the three little Bears house and stay on my side of the property. Her tiny little hands were balled up tight and she stomped her feet. “Why do you need to fill the pond with fish?” His blue eyes crinkled in the corner “So I can catch them and cook them for dinner and breakfast if I want” Tears welled in her eyes. “Will they touch me if I swim in the water?” He felt a bit sorry for her she was clearly squeamish about the fish. “Well, I put them in every year. The Carpenters never cared, I always had Hank over to fish and I kept them with a good supply in their freezer.” She shook her head “Keep your fish to yourself. I am not into killing and cutting up living things to fill my belly.” He burst out laughing. He slowly held his hand out to shake hers “It would seem we are neighbors. I am Bobby Calder.” She looked up at him curiously “Mayor Robert Calder?” she asked. Bobby nodded at her still holding his hand out. She looked at the dumpy cabin and frowned “Doesn’t look like the home of the mayor.” He shrugged now and took in her pouty lips and her tiny waist that bloomed into very round and sexy hips. “Ugh I don’t live here its just a little fishing camp. Me and my dad and my brothers have been coming here since I was just a kid. It’s supposed to be rustic. It just needs a fish cleaning station, a bathroom and a bed.” She wrinkled her pert little nose. “So, are you here just like once in a while?” He nodded “Yeah, in the spring and summer, like now, I come once or twice a week. I am quiet though; you won’t be bothered by me.” She grabbed her bike handles and turned her bike toward her home. “So, it won’t like, have fish jumping out of the water all the time and suff.” He smiled slowly “Nope I ordered the docile fish that just swim around the bottom. They were out of the kind that jump right into your boat, those are my favorites.” She growled as she got on her bike and road back to the path that went around the pond. He staired as she peddled along and the shape of her hips on that tiny bike seat led him to think of a lot of things that had nothing to do with fishing. He called out “Ugh I didn’t get your name.” she turned the bike back around and rode up to him. “Its on the mail box Mr. Mayor. And I don’t think we will need each other’s names.” Bobby laughed and nodded “Okay pleased to meet you. Let me know if I can ever do anything to help you out.” She dropped her feet to the dirt on the ground and looked up at him. “I am very self-sufficient, just keep your fish and friends on your half of the pond” Bobby saluted her as she turned again and peddled away. He had to laugh a bit as he pictured her in a witch’s hat with a little dog in the basket of the bicycle. “Don’t let any houses fall on you.” She stopped again but did not turn to face him. She closed her eyes tight and wished he would shut the hell up. She again popped onto the seat and peddled toward home.
Bobby wasn’t sure why he was out at the pond again the next day. He looked around at the place and nodded to himself. “Yep” he said to his self. “It does need some spiffing up. It is a bit of a dump” He went and picked up a few falling down pieces of lumber from the make shift out door shower. That had been a insist from his first wife. She didn’t mind the old place as long as she could wash the fish smell off before bed. At least she had wanted to spend time with him. The second and third wives never even made it out here. It was the man place in their minds. That was pretty much the reason dad had gotten it. It was the Hide a Way. A place for the men to go and leave the world behind. He shrugged, weird how it worked out. Not much to leave behind these days. Now they all looked forward to coming out and having a bit of company. Mom passed about five years back. All his wives were now exes. And his happily married brothers always seemed to only make it out for an afternoon here or there. They always had something to do for the kids or with the wife. They always made a fuss over it but they never changed their minds they always scurried off home in time for dinner. After applying a coat of redwood paint to the repaired shower wall and to the repaired deck Bobby sat on an old lawn chair and promptly ended up on a pile of bent up aluminum. He laughed as he looked at the worn webbing and popped aluminum rivets. He
Remembered when his dad brought those from the house, he was about 15 then. Mom was pissed off and went to Marcarelli’s Department store and bought new fancy chairs with cushions. She proudly called it new “Patio Furniture” She was so proud of that. They had a big cook out so everyone on the block could see her fancy patio. He looked across at the lavender Adirondack chairs and laughed. ‘Mom would have loved the hell out of that little place’ he thought to himself. He watched as the girl Lana was doing something on her dock. Why did she paint it White? It was going to need to be painted often to keep it looking decent with the color white? She was laughing like all heck about something. She was inflating something. Oh God he thought to himself It’s a giant round float. He hoped she knew what the heck she was doing. It better be anchored or she was likely to end up on his side of the pond in no time. He shrugged and went to his phone to see about some new sturdy patio furniture that he could get before Dad and the guys came out next week.
Lana was over powered by the float; it was big enough for a bunch of people but she wanted to get it out so she could sun bath on the pond. It was one of the things she wanted when she bought the place. She attached the clips to the round anchor hooks on the side of the dock. It was kind of stupid she guessed; she should have just sunbathed on her dock. But it was round and yellow and looked like it belonged. She put her hands to her hips and smiled not realizing she had Bobby’s eyes on her. He was shaking his head wondering why she didn’t have a boy friend or someone to set things up right. He watched as she squatted on the dock and she was laughing. He couldn’t hear the sound clearly but it looked like she was talking. He frowned ‘Maybe she had her phone there.’ He thought. She was laughing more than ever and tossing something in the water. He was very curious now. He quietly walked around the far side of the pond. Lots of woods and shrubs on that side so he didn’t have to listen to her nagging if she glanced up. When he got close enough to hear he nearly burst out laughing. She had a big bag of corn feed and she was talking and tossing in hand full to the hungry fish. “Leave it to a man to put you in here and not find a way for you to eat.” She was giggling as they churned up the water in a feeding frenzy. She clearly had a few favorites she had named. Good God he hoped they didn’t accidently catch Alice or Flipper. Those two seemed to be her favorites. He sat in the bushes watching for an hour or better. She talked and talked and for some damn reason they seemed to be listening to her. She shook her finger at one fish and called him nosey. Maybe with any luck that would be one of the fish they took from the pond. He fantasized about this little snip demanding to see the fish he caught so she could liberate them before they became fish fry. Slowly it started to hit him. He liked this strange new neighbor of his. When she disappeared into her house, he took the opportunity to make his way back to his side of the pond. He realized this place he had enjoyed in its run-down state needed a lot of care. He had put the metal roof on the cabin last summer but it still looked horrible with its peeling paint and dirty windows. In fact, since he painted the deck and the outdoor shower The Cabin looked even worse. He called Art, the guy the city hired to keep things looking picturesque. He asked him how much to paint the place and clean the windows a bit. Art looked at him as if he was speaking a different language. “You going to sell this place Bobby? That would be a bummer. We all look forward to our fishing days and stuff” Bobby looked at him and shook his head no. “Its still dads place I just realize if I don’t fix some stuff its going to be a pile of rubble.” Art nodded and looked around. “Could use some Dock work too you know.” Bobby looked at the badly tilting dock and said “Well how much do you think to make it look presentable?” Art scratched his head a bit. “Well, I aint charging you what I charged that fairy tale girl. Geeze she is a weird one. For 5,000.00 I could paint the cabin in and out and rebuild your dock. Looks like you already did a lot of work.” Bobby whipped out his private credit card and asked
“How much to fix up the landscaping?” Art looked shocked “Geez Bobby I think Mother nature can take care of that don’t you?” He nodded in agreement thinking he would get a few bushes to stick on the deck. Art glared at Bobby with a disgusted look on his face “Don’t even tell me baby blue or some weird color.” Bobby laughed “No redwood and Forest Green are fine on this side of the pond Art.” Art started laughing “Thank God man I though you were going nuts on me.”
‘Going nuts’ Bobby recollected. A year and 2 months ago were when He first crossed paths with Lana. All the clashing and banging heads, It seemed now like a way for him to be close to her. Maybe it was fate that put them there on the shores of the same pond facing each other. Some where in side he felt like his mom would be very happy about the whole thing. He watched as Lana got in the little lavender row boat and a usher rowed out to the new floating doc he and his dad and brothers had built for the occasion. It was pretty large and yes it was painted white. On the doc was the wedding party and his family. Lana didn’t really have family. She had a few girlfriends. The rest of the town filled the shores where ever they could find a space to spread a blanket. Everyone cheered as Bobby helped his lovely Bride in a lace gown with flowers and ribbons hanging every where on the dock. A small group on the shore played the wedding song and she beamed at him with all the love he had not seen since he was a kid. The Minister said the legal needs for the wedding and Bobby was so happy when he got to kiss and hold his bride, Lana in his arms. At the moment they were pronounced husband and wife. Art did as he was instructed and tossed the fish feed in the pond so the fish his lovely wife was attached to could leap up and get a view of the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He was very happy to be a part of this fairy tale at last.
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3 comments
First of all, this is a super cute story. You have some adorable descriptive language here: "She loved the bright yellow she had chosen to paint the cottage. It looked like the color of happiness. She giggled out loud answering her own thoughts 'Yes if happiness was a color.'” The plot pace is well done, and the ending is great. I would recommend more editing, though. Primarily, you need additional paragraph breaks. Especially where different people are talking--their dialogue should be separate. For example: Art looked at him as if h...
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excellent advice any online classes or books you could suggest to help me in that area? I have received this advice before and would like to work on it. Thank you, Annie Packingham
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I don't know of any classes, but these might at least get you started: https://www.book-editing.com/start-paragraph-fiction/ https://www.twinkl.com/teaching-wiki/writing-a-story-what-dialogue-rules-should-i-use
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