Just the Beginning

Reedsy (story starts with 2 characters saying ‘goodbye’                                 4^th June 2020                      

Just the Beginning

by Josephine Nolan

“You will understand some day and thank me”. Who was she kidding? She would never forget the strained look on his face, trying to hold it together. Their eyes lingered until he became a blur. Molly stood on the platform as the train chugged its way down the track and out of sight.

Her mother had always been difficult, demanding. “You’re out every night” rang in her ears as she boarded the bus home. 

It wasn’t true. God knows she had waited hand and foot on her mother since her father passed away, and that was five years ago. Her mother was always bemoaning the fact that ‘if your father was still here, he would look after me’. 

Molly was entitled to a life but put her mother first more times than she deserved.

“Nothing’s the same again” she would moan, weeping into her hands.

She was right about that. Molly remembered her long-suffering dad. He would do whatever he was asked, never with a word of dissent. When Molly was a teenager, there were time when she couldn’t stand it.

“He’s just mowed the lawn” she would say to her mother “Give him a break will you”.

Sometimes she felt angry that her dad took it, but she never said anything to him. Looking back, she was glad she hadn’t.

How did she manage to take the place of her father? It was alright most of the time. She had her job to occupy her and a few pals to talk to, give out to about her mother. Somewhere along the line, they got fed up listening to Molly’s moans. “Get a life for yourself” that’s what they were really saying.

Then she met Robert. He was changing her. He was showing her the possibilities. When they were together, she was a different person. “Life is for living”, that was his motto. It was contagious. Molly began to feel that good things could happen if she really wanted them to. She was so in love with this man and with life. Robert had planned to go to Australia before he met Molly. The excitement of a new life filled her imagination. Her mother would manage while they were away. Molly would arrange for someone to call every day, clean the house, do the shopping. Twelve months would pass in no time.  She ignored the sulks and silent treatment from her mother. That was until the accident. 

Molly came home one night and found her mother in a heap at the bottom of the stairs. Her smiles and happiness turned to shrieks. 

“Call an ambulance” she shouted to Robert, trying to lift her mother. 

With the phone at his ear, Robert said, “don’t move her till the paramedics come.”

The ambulance arrived in no time and herself and Robert waited until the nurses settled her mother into a ward. 

“She was lucky this time” the nurse told Molly. She had badly sprained her ankle and had a few bruises. The staff were praising ‘her wonderful mother’. How far did she fall? Molly initially thought her mother had fallen all the way down the stairs, but it seemed she tripped on the last few steps. Hanging on to the banisters saved her.

Molly told Robert she wouldn’t stand in his way. She persuaded him to go ahead with his plans. Although he protested and wanted to help Molly look after her mother, Molly knew that would be hard enough for her. She wouldn’t let Robert sacrifice his dreams. 

“I’ll still be here when you get back” she told Robert. 

“I’ll come back for you” he promised.

Molly went part time at the department store. She helped her mother get dressed, did all the cooking and housework. She lived for the letters from Robert. He found it hard at first and missed her. The letters came every month for the first year. He had done all sorts of job. One day he met a man who owned a hotel about seventy miles from Sydney. He was renovating a hotel and offered Richard a job. Richard’s engineering experience would be useful.

Richard moved to Newcastle. It was about a two-hour drive from Sydney. At first his letters gushed with how beautiful the place was. It was at the mouth of the Hunter River, near beaches and a half hour drive from Lake Maquarie.  It was a good town for raising children, had excellent shops and schools. He thought Molly would love its white sandy beaches. He told her he had got to know a few families. People there were very laid back and welcoming.  He said he was working all hours and was saving hard.  Molly was trying to read between the lines. She wondered what his social life was like. Had he met anyone yet. She imagined lovely bronzed girls on the beaches.

By now Molly had left work, as looking after her mother became a full-time job. She heard less from her friends. What had she to talk about anyway? Every day was mundane. She got a bad flu that winter and ended up in hospital with pneumonia. Her mother had to go into residential care for the duration. When she was well enough to go home, Molly was advised to leave her mother where she was for a few months until she was strong enough to look after her.

Then the world was hit by the Coronavirus. It was lockdown everywhere. All non-essential shops closed except for supermarkets and pharmacies. Pubs and restaurants closed.  Two meters’ social distance in public places became the norm. Front line staff in hospitals were the heroes.  Only essential services like public transport were still up and running. Where possible employees were working from home. People wearing face masks in the streets became a way of life.  There was an open green running alongside a river opposite Molly’s house. The early morning was a good time to go for a walk or to the supermarket. The sun shone from morning until evening-time, unusual for that time of the year. As there had been little rain since March, the once lush green grass in the park had dried up. Molly’s garden became her sanctuary.  It gave her purpose and brought back memories of her father. Just when she was getting into a routine, her mother contracted the virus in the nursing home. She was rushed to intensive care. The staff at the hospital were inundated with patients, working tirelessly every day. They did their best.  When her mother passed away, Molly didn’t get the chance to say goodbye. She was heartbroken. 

Every country was experiencing the same onslaught, even as far as Australia where Robert was. Flights were discontinued. Lockdown and guaranine were imposed. Soon the pandemic was all over the place

It had been a long while since Molly heard from Robert. Sometimes she struggled to get up in the morning. Clothes lay in a pile on the bedroom floor. Molly was looking for an excuse to do nothing. That was easy. Then her friend Julie called to the door. “Could I speak to…Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t recognise you” she blurted out. Molly was embarrassed, her friend Julie was mortified. They talked for a while, at a safe distance. Julie tried to encourage her friend, maybe to go back to work when things were normal again. Julie had been laid off, but there was on-line shopping, which helped keep things from going under.   

“You only get one chance at life”, Julie said.

It sounded familiar. Way back in her mind, she remembered being told the same thing before. Julie wanted to ask about Richard but was treading lightly.

“This virus won’t last forever Molly.  Imagine if you were in Australia, sunshine all year round”.

Molly couldn’t bring herself to talk about Robert. She wanted to, but by now she felt Robert was another failure in her life.

“I’m in a flat now with one of the girls from work, Molly.  When things get back to normal, why don’t you ring me, and we can have a night out”. She scribbled a telephone number and left it on the table.

Julie’s visit made Molly take stock. She was only thirty-two but felt a hundred. There were dark circles under her eyes. She had wrinkles she never noticed before. When she looked closer, her dark hair was now streaked with grey. She was horrified.  With the lockdown, she couldn’t get to a hairdresser. She would have to use home remedies. 

Molly continued her walks around the park every morning and evening. She went to the seafront and felt the warm sun on her face, waves curling around her bare feet.  It cleared her mind and gave her a reason to smile again. She hadn’t heard from Robert for many months now. Molly blamed the Pandemic. She decided that she would go to Australia when this was over. Impulsively, she bought a few dresses on-line and started to cross the months off the calendar. Some days were still a struggle for Molly, but her determination kept her going.

The daffodils and spring flowers had already faded. The garden was overgrown. Before tackling the garden, Molly decided it was time for a clear-out. The charity shops were closed, but she could bag her mothers’ clothes and leave them in the garage, along with stuff of her own. There were several handbags at the bottom of her mother’s wardrobe. She checked they were empty before putting them into a black plastic bag. She opened her mother’s regular bag.  Inside was a brown leather purse which contained two twenty-pound notes and some change. There was a white handkerchief with lace in one corner. Her mother’s lipstick and bottle of 4711 cologne. Molly unzipped an inside pocket. She took out an envelope. It was from Western Union and addressed to Molly.  Inside was a cheque for a thousand Australian dollars. It was from Robert and postmarked November 2019, before the pandemic had spread across the world.  

Molly sat in shock for a while. Then she flung the bag across the room. “How could she do this to me?”  Between bursts of anger and frustration, in those moments she hated her mother. She wasn’t sure what to do next. That night she tossed.  Pictures of Robert waiting for her response filled her mind. Visions of her mother hiding the envelope. In the end, in the pitch black she got up and went downstairs. At some stage she drifted off in the chair, awaking to the sounds of birds singing outside in the garden. Molly made coffee and slumped back into the chair. 

There was only one thing she could do. Ring the number in Newcastle where Robert worked. Robert had written on the hotel paper once or twice. Molly sat at the bottom of the stairs and dialled. A woman’s voice answered. 

“Could I speak to Robert Davis please?”

There was static on the line. Molly waited. Then a man’s voice came on to the line.

“You’re looking for Rob? Could I ask who’s calling?”. 

Molly told him. 

“Oh, hiya Molly. I’m Mike Lawlor. I’ve heard so much about you. Sorry to hear your mother passed away. That was tough”. 

“Is Robert there?” Molly asked. Her voice was beginning to quiver. 

“Ah, that’s a shame Molly. Rob finished up here about three months ago. Said he was heading home. Thought he’d be there already. Haven’t you heard from him? He was a great guy Molly. We really miss him here”. 

There was a moment’s silence, then Mike said,

“I took it you would have heard from him before we did”. 

“Not yet. With this Coronavirus, everything’s upside down. I expect I will hear from him sooner or later.  Thanks Mike. Nice talking to you.” 

“Sure Molly, it’s the same here. Dreadful business. Let me know if you hear from him. We were great mates. I’d hate to lose touch.”

Molly said ‘goodbye’ and hung up. 

The country was three months into the Coronavirus. Things were easing up a bit, but still people were dying. It would be a long time before things were normal again. Molly felt there was nothing more she could do. They had never skyped as Molly had no laptop. Her mobile was basic. She had tried his mobile a few times, without success. She decided to buy a laptop and see if she could find him some other way. For now, Molly would play the waiting game. She felt it was her new beginning. Maybe Robert would arrive on her doorstep one day. She hoped he would. With or without Robert though, she had to move on with her life. Like Robert would say, “life is for living.”

2,130 words.