"I'm so bored!" A rambunctious ten-year-old boy yelled to his older sister. Her emerald eyes shone anxiously as she looked around, trying her best to silence the dark-haired boy. "Shhh! Be careful! You don't want to attract any monsters, do you?" The young boy groaned loudly once more, repeating the phrase "But I'm bored!" for about the hundredth time. "You know we have to stay put! We can't get caught!" She whisper-yelled, bringing her thin finger to her lips.
The young boy simply sighed and said, "You're right. But we have to at least do something that isn't sitting here all day." His maroon eyes glimmering with annoyance as he clambered onto a new stump. "Fine, if you want something to do, Alestor, go find some wood and dry leaves for the fire tonight." She said to him sternly, unsheathing an ivory dagger that had once only been used by nobles. Alestor shrugged in annoyance. "Why do I have to get the firewood Luna? Can't I do something cool like hunting?" He complained boredom very clear in his tone. Luna sighed, brushing her dark brown bangs out of her face. "You know you're way too young. The elders of the village will train you once you turn thirteen. You earn your title tonight. And I'll be chosen to become the new leader to protect against the Night Prowlers." She spoke matter of factually.
Alestor simply shrugged and started on his job while his sister looked out into the dense shrubbery of Silver Hollow. He tried to ignore her look of pain, having been forced to grow up after their parents had been taken by the Night Prowlers. She had been entrusted with their parents ivory and obsidian daggers, a symbol of the power their family had over the village. Alestor sighed as he picked up something that he had believed was a stick, however, yelped in surprise, dropping the object he had touched, alerting Luna in the process.
Luna jumped off her perch in a tree, unsheathing both daggers as she ran to him. "What happened?!" She demanded. Alestor gulped and pointed to the object he dropped. It was a Night Prowler bone. Luna growled before removing her leather gauntlet and giving it to Alestor. "Pick it up. It's valuable, but it needs to be purified. You... didn't touch it directly, did you?" She demanded and questioned. He slowly nodded, unsure of how his sister would react. Her expression morphed into one of complete panic. She carefully removed incense and the silver root from her satchel crushing them as he presented his hand. She carefully muttered an enchantment her eyelids fluttering as she let the juices of the silver root and the spices of the incense drip onto his hand. He felt a burning sensation and he fought the urge to scream while her eyes glowed.
Once she finished, Alestor thanked her fearfully, and they both walked back to the village. "We welcome your return O great Luna Moonshade, the future Village leader." Is what they were greeted with. Luna gave an awkward wave as she was met by an elder. Alestor handed the pile of wood to the flame master's apprentice. He watched as Luna was led away with the Night Prowler bone taken from her. Alestor, having gotten used to being ignored, simply walked away to go and mingle among the cheerful youth of the village, meaning those who enjoyed his stories of his parents. The younger boys, with which he had been assigned to live with, were all within the ages of six and ten. And he had been put in charge.
He made his way to the large hollowed-out log that was his current home if it could even count as a home. "Big brother Alestor!" Called the youngest of the bunch. Alestor, being the relaxed leader he was, never minded the nicknames he had been given, however, one of the elders had scolded him for not demanding respect from the younger boys. He knelt in front of the soon to be six-year-old and placed a swift finger on his lips. "Shhh. Call me 'Alestor sir' when we're outside. You know... so the elders don't get mad." The younger boy gave a smile so bright it could rival the sun. "Okay, big brother Alestor 'sir'!" Alestor chuckled slightly before ruffling the boy's hair and walking into their home. "Big brother Alestor, you need to take roll call." Stated an eight-year-old. He sighed before he finally pulled a list written on dry hide. "Connor?" He began, as he was answered by the airy grunt of a nine-year-old. He continued down the list, finishing with the name of the youngest, "Lucas?" Which resulted in the hyper, bouncing almost-six-year-old screeching that he was indeed there.
He quickly completed the tasks of house leader before taking his 'little brothers' to the central pavilion where his sister and the elders would wait, seeing as he would turn eleven by the day's first hour. Luna smiled at her brother upon his arrival. And she began the ceremony for which he would prove his strength and earn the second serving of the day's hunt for his brothers because he knew they would often be the last to eat, often the remains of what had been caught.
"Good people of Silver Hollow's Moon Village, we welcome today the leader of the House of Youth, who will earn his title by the first hour." She flashed an encouraging smile at him before an Elder moved toward her, their grandmother. "Now, it is time for the crowning of our new leader. Step forward, granddaughter." She said. Luna walked toward her, holding bowing her head as she handed the Elder her ivory dagger. Alestor watched nervously as the dagger was unsheathed and pressed to his older sister's wrist, drawing beads of crimson liquid, and allowing it to drip into sugar sweet nectar. Luna took the bowl which contained the blood-tainted nectar and lifted it to her lips. She took a sip, as should be in the crowning ceremony, before she threw the bowl in the fire, making it flare upward, and become brighter than that of any other leader before, drawing the painful hisses and snarls from the Night Prowlers that lurked in the dark. A crown with a crescent moon was gently placed on her head as joyous cheers erupted from the crowd, Alestor smiling proudly at his sister. Luna pounded the ground, silencing the pavilion, and looked at Alestor.
She took a deep "Now, we shall begin the test which will determine Alestor Moonshade's title." The House of Youth stomped on the ground, cheering for him. Alestor's mouth formed a smirk as he stood up a little straighter. Luna continues with a glint in her eye, "Your test, my brother, is to take this light," A torch was handed to him, "Light the four torches that lead to the sky water's domain and return here by the first hour." He nodded with determination and he looked in the direction of the darkest path, the path that leads to the sky water's domain and he took off.
***************
Hours had passed, first hour nearing quickly as Luna paced the pavilion around the fire. "I knew it. I knew he was too young for this!" She muttered anxiously. There was no sign of the third torch being lit, the Hollow was quiet. Too quiet for her liking, there was no sound of running. "Calm yourself, Leader." Her grandmother rasped trying to soothe the sixteen-year-old. "He will return, the Night Prowlers cannot take that child so easily." She added. Luna looked once again in the forest, looking at the two torches that had been lit, the third still dark. She felt the bony hands of the Elders take her, steering her away from the Hollow's entrance, not before she looked back once more. "Brother, if by some miracle you can hear me, please return." As she disappeared into the village, she could have sworn she heard Alestor's voice, "I await you in the Hollow my sister."
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11 comments
Awesome story! One thing, you might want to make the paragraphs a little smaller and put different paragraphs for when a different character speaks.
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Thanks! And I'll keep that in mind!
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Of course!!
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amazing story:)
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Thank you very much!
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Great story. I get the impression that these are wolves? The story moves easily, keeping the reader's attention. Good imagination and nice visuals (smile so bright it could rival the sun). The only advice I'd give is to watch your paragraphs. Each time someone speaks should be a new paragraph. Also, if you use an action tag, then it's not necessary to use "he/she said." This is a story that seems to beg for more. Who were the Night Prowlers (humans? hunters?) Why did they take the parents? You could work this into a novella. Great job.
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Wonderfully written!
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Thank you!
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This story is awesome! Also, I saw in your bio that Rick Riodian is your favorite author. He's one of my favorites, too!
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Thanks! Also, cool!
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No problem.
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