How it Feels to be Forgotten

This is how it feels to be forgotten.

Left behind.

Not needed.

I remember when I first met you. Your eyes lit up upon seeing me. You picked me up, inspected me every which way. Did the same motions to my twin. Told us we were perfect, that we were what you always wanted.

You took us home. Our home. A beautiful place with many rooms, wood floors, fuzzy carpets that I loved to lay on.

You bragged to your friends about me. About us. My twin and I were constantly shown off. You wouldn’t let anyone get too close with their grubby hands. We had regular baths; your parents didn’t want us to be smelly.

There was so much love. So much adoration. I live for you. You are my purpose in life. 

Slowly, things started to change. My twin and I weren’t as pampered anymore. We started becoming an afterthought. Soon, we barely left the house. We weren’t even allowed on the fuzzy carpet anymore. 

My twin thought we were done for. That we were going to be tossed away. My twin was always the pessimist. I prefer to believe that things will right themselves soon.

Then one day, we went out. I was so excited. We headed for the car. I love car rides. It meant we were going somewhere far, somewhere fun. My twin and I practically buzzed with excitement.

The fresh air was just what we needed. We ran, we jumped, we explored. It was as if nothing had changed since that first day you got us. 

Surely you were just busy the past few weeks. I hear you talking to your friends about how hard school is and all the sports you were a part of. I just knew you missed me as much as I miss you. 

Things become normal again. We had a bath that night. We got to lie on my favorite fuzzy carpet. I looked at my twin. We were content. We were still loved. 

Months passed. While we didn’t go out as much as we used to in the beginning, you made sure to still take us out every so often and cared for us. I understand. Life does get in the way sometimes. I’m just happy you paid attention to me again.

Your dad put a tree in the living room. I watched as the family decorated it. Everyone was in high spirits. It made me excited too. 

Boxes were placed under the tree in colorful paper. You shook each one that had your name on it. It made me laugh. You’re so funny. 

One morning, the family gathered around the tree again. You and your siblings tore into the boxes. Paper was thrown everywhere. No one cared about the mess. My twin was accidentally covered in paper too. I know I’m the better looking one, anyway. 

You opened a box and became super excited. The paper from your box dropped over me too. I couldn’t see what you got, but I was happy because you were happy. 

Your mom picked up all the discarded paper. You were missing. That’s okay. You were probably busy again. I’d just wait for you. I’ll always wait for you. 

Days passed. I saw you from time to time, but you were always in such a rush. School must’ve been really busy again. 

My twin noticed something was wrong and tried to tell me, but I ignored them. Nothing would ever be wrong. Not when I had you.

You took us out again. I knew we’d be fine! We went on a car ride, you left the windows down. We sat in the backseat between you and your brother. 

I began snoozing. I get sleepy a little more often than usual, but naps always give me that burst of energy I’ll need when you want to play. 

You and your brother started arguing. He became very angry. He grabbed your water bottle and threw it out the window. You shouted and hit him. He grabbed me next.

It was such a blur. One second I sat next to you, then next I found myself rolling on the ground outside. The car sped off. My head spun as I tried to figure out what was going on. 

By the time I corrected myself, the car completely disappeared. I will not panic. I know you’ll come back for me. You love me because I love you. 

I watch the cars passing by. Any second now, I know, I’ll see you running to me. You’ll scoop me up in your arms and we’ll go home and have a bath and I’ll get to lay on my favorite rug. I just have to be patient. I have to be good. 

I don’t know how much time passed. It got cold. It got dark. Cars continued passing me by, none of them noticing I’m here. 

You probably don’t know where I am. I don’t want to leave my spot. What if you’re looking for me? If I left, we could miss each other. Better not chance it. 

The sun returned. It’s getting warm again. Okay, now there was light. You’ll have a better chance of finding me now. I’ll stay right here. 

It got dark and cold again. I heard unfamiliar noises. I won’t let that scare me, though. I have to be strong for you. 

I hope my twin isn’t worrying too much about me. I know you’re assuring them that you’re doing everything you can to find me. 

Just be patient. 

The sun came back and left again. The cycle continued. Still, I won’t lose hope. After all, why wouldn’t you come find me?

Sure, I have some wear and tear. My tongue is lopsided, my scars aren't fading away, my soles are getting thin. I’m older now but I still do everything for you.

Finally, I came to realize the bitter truth.

You’re not coming back. 

I am now the forgotten shoe on the side of the road.