Follow the Dream

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I just bought a journal from a newsagent, and I have a plan for it, but I thought I would get started with a quick entry.

Today was not so bad. I feel like I really got into the zone at work, and I caught up on everything I was behind on. The boss even came past and told me what a great job I was doing. And it seemed like everyone was acting decently today. Even Jodie from marketing restrained her usual venomous tongue.

On the train home I was watching video’s on Tik Tok when I saw a clip of a burning house, and I remember feeling a discomforting horror. I quickly swiped away, but the feeling lasted until my train pulled up at my stop.

Tomorrow I’ll decide for certain what I’m going to do with this journal, but let’s just say I have a nice plan up my sleeve.

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So, this is going to be my lucid dreaming journal. I’m writing this entry before my first night of sleep, but normally I will be recording my dreams first thing when I wake up. I am really excited to see how this goes.

Apparently, some people think they don’t dream usually, but that is only because they forget the dreams so quickly. If you take the trouble to record them as soon as they are over, you will start to realize you are flooded with dreams all the time.

So why am I doing this? I like the idea of developing lucid dreaming. In a lucid dream, you can influence what happens to some degree, because you are aware you are dreaming. I have noticed in a lot of my dreams I am already aware that I am dreaming. In fact, it’s unusual for me not to know this. My uncle said this was a rare gift, and I should develop it through practice.

Lucid dreaming is a practice that Tibetan masters have honed, known as ‘Dream Yoga.’ There are exercises that can be performed, such as holding a stone in your hand as you fall asleep, and then attempting to find the stone in your dream. I heard about this kind of thing from my uncle, but since I am already experiencing lucid dreaming, I will be happy just to see how I go without doing anything abnormal.

Alright, time to go to bed! Let's see how it goes!

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I was walking around a strange, jungle-like place. The sky was filled with myriad birds flying with luminescent rainbow feathers. It was grey and raining, and yet the world did not lack colour. A serene lady with golden hair in a blue dress walked me to the edge of a hill we were standing on, and then before giving me one last smile, she ran down the hill into the thick vegetation. I ran to follow her, but my steps kept launching me into the air as if I was leaping. Every jump was higher than the last one, and I felt the impact of landing after each one. I began to dread these landings, as I could feel it jolt my body every time I hit the ground. My last jump was so high, I was in fear of the terrible pain I would feel when my feet hit the ground, but just as I thumped into the ground my whole body felt one final shake, and I woke up.

This dream did not seem very lucid, as I did not feel I had much control. I think I knew I was dreaming, but it didn’t occur to me that I could change anything.

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I was standing on a crowded train going through the bustling city. It was overcast and raining. There were so many people standing up, and yet I did not feel hard pressed or claustrophobic. I looked around and saw the golden-haired woman from the previous nights dream standing near the door. She was wearing a grey overcoat, but the shine of her hair made her stand out, and her features were lit up by the golden rays of the afternoon sun, peeking through the overcast clouds. Seeing her there, I remembered when I had last saw her, and realized in an instant that I was dreaming.

The train began to pull into Central station, and the doors opened. She got out of the train. I wanted to catch up to her to say something, but the crowds were in my way, and I couldn’t push through to get the doors. The doors began to shut, and the train moved away from the station, and I saw her through the window one last time before I woke up.

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I was in a large room with sandstone walls, sitting at a table with a white linen tablecloth, with the rest of my four brothers. We were waiting for our food to be served. Right from the outset, I knew I was dreaming, but all I could think of at that time was that I wanted the food to be served so I could taste it. My brother James said to me, that we should really complain to the manager, as we had been waiting a long time. Just then, I noticed the golden-haired lady again, sitting at another table across from us. I realized I was very curious to know more about her, as this was the third time I had seen her.

I wrote on a napkin with a pen that I had with me, saying, ‘have you been waiting a long time too?’ I handed the note to a waiter, and pointed to the lady, and he walked past her table and dropped off the napkin to her. I saw her read it, and then look straight at me and smile. She got up, left her table, walked over to me and said, “follow me.”

We both got up and left the building. Outside it was raining again. It always seemed to be raining when she was around. She took my hand and we walked away from the building into a lush park.

“Who are you?” I asked her uncertainly.

She laughed and replied, “You already know.”

“But I don’t know.” I said.

The rain began to increase in intensity, and I felt the dream slipping away, but she said one last thing before I woke up.

“Come find me again, and you will remember.”

---

This journal entry is not about a dream; it is something that happened to me today. I am writing this now as I just got home and it is still fresh in my mind.

I was out on my lunch break from the office, and I was sipping a latte I had bought from the local café. The sky was cloudy, and soon it began to rain. I was sitting on a park bench when the first drops started to fall, and I was about to head back to the office, when I saw her. The golden-haired lady from my dreams.

She was walking down the street on the other side of the road in a thick fleecy coat. I saw her turn and look at me, but she continued to walk away. I crossed the road just as she was turning the corner around the block, but when I caught up to where I saw her turn, she was gone.

I was sure that was her, and there was something familiar about her, certainly, though I couldn’t place it. Come find me again and you will remember, that was what she said. Will I see her again tonight?

---

Last night my dream was entirely unlike the ones I’ve recorded so far.

An oppressive rumbling filled the air, as I walked in a winding labyrinth. I wandered around, feeling completely and utterly lost. Everywhere the walls and floor were grey marble, and above was pitch black. As I walked, I began to hear footsteps, quiet at first but getting slowly louder. As I turned and travailed, I was beset with the feeling that I had to keep away from whatever was following me.

Eventually I came to two doors. I stared blankly at them for a while, before realizing, ‘I have to go through one of them before those footsteps close in on me.’ It seemed like a grave choice to make, as I felt that were I to pick the wrong door, I would be faced with some incomprehensible horror. I vacillated there, feeling a rising sense of panic.

But at that moment, rain began to fall, and I saw her again. The golden-haired lady walked out from the passage and walked up in front of me.

“Behind one of these doors, you will be confronted with your worst fear. Let me help you.”

“Help me?” I asked her.

“I will tell you which door is safe.”

That was when I remembered her. When I was about 10 years old, I was caught in a house fire. The flames were bearing down on me, and smoke filled the air. I escaped that fire with the aid of my parents, but ever after I was plagued with nightmares of fire and death. That was when I started to see her.

Rain would begin to fall, and a golden-haired woman would show up in my dreams, and then everything would be alright. The fire was quenched and she would lead me to peaceful places of repose, and the nightmare would be gone.

“I remember you.” I said to her. “You’re my guardian angel from my dreams.”

She smiled, her face so gentle, and spoke to me. “You don’t have much time. Here. The way out is through this door.”

I stood in front of the door, but turned once more to look at her. “Will I see you again?”

“Hurry.” She replied. “You will see me again.”

I opened it, and my eyes were filled with white light, and just like that, I was awake.

How strange it feels to be awake now, thinking of everything that transpired while I slept. And how come I saw her yesterday while I was at work? At least I think I did. I’ll figure this out.

---

Yes, I’m writing another journal entry that isn’t about dreams.

Today at work I couldn’t stop thinking about the golden-haired woman, and that meant that I was mentally somewhere else. I barely got anything done.

On my lunch break I sat on the bench again and looked around hoping to see her.

Am I going crazy? Well, if I didn’t see her in reality today, then I at least know one place I can find her. I will be writing my dream tomorrow morning.

---

This time I found myself on an airship sailing through a blue expanse. Fluffy white clouds were scattered throughout the sky. The ship drew ever closer to a majestic white castle, before docking next to one of the walls.

As I stepped out of the ship, the sky began to darken. ‘Good,’ I thought, she’ll be here soon. I stood watching the grey clouds wrap themselves around the castle, before it began to rain. And then, I saw her walking towards me from the other end of the wall.

I watched her languidly make her way towards me, her movement full of grace.

When she stood before me, I asked her, “How is it that I saw you outside my work two days ago? Are you real?”

Her eyes turned downward, and she ran a finger through her hair. “What do you mean by real? Am I here in front of you now?”

“I’m dreaming now, I saw you when I was awake.”

Her eyes rose to meet mine. Dreaming, awake, it doesn’t matter. What matters is what you feel in the present moment.”

The rain lightly speckled my skin, and behind her, I saw a rainbow begin to form.

“Are you my guardian Angel?" I asked her, uncertainly.

She laughed. “You can call me that if you want. I’ve been watching over you for some time, keeping you safe in your dreams.”

She turned away from me, and continued. “But now I want to do more then that. I want to free you from the shackles of normal life. I want you to follow me through one more great and never-ending dream.”

I looked at her forlorn figure, the rain still hitting my face. “Didn’t you say that there is no great difference between dreaming and being awake?”

Once again, she faced me, her eyes locking with mine. “Exactly.”

The sky began to clear, and amber rays of sunshine swelled against the castle, illuminating her figure.

“What do you want me to do?" I asked.

As the dream began to slip away, I heard her one last time.

“Come find me….”

---

It’s been an hour since my last journal entry. I showered and dressed myself, but those words are still ringing in my ears. Find her. I don’t know where she’ll be, but I’ll find her. Where-ever she goes, I will follow. This will be my last journal entry.