Through the Glass

Day 1

On the first day, I opened my eyes. Or perhaps they were already open, but I was just now seeing for the first time. My view of the world was tinted by foggy glass, but I could make out shapes that were large and square. I didn’t know what any of it meant. What I did know was that I was cold. So, so cold; the freezing temperature made me want to shiver but I couldn’t move. I couldn’t turn, twist, sit down or jump. I was still, and something told me I always had been, and that I always would be. A strange green cone structure was to my left, decorated in powdery white flakes. I noticed I was smiling, and that I couldn't stop no matter how much I wanted to. Suddenly, I, or should I say me in my cage of glass, was lifted off the ground. I was jostled back and forth as I was moved across the place I was in, different shapes passing my limited vision as I was moved along. As I was shaken, white powder similar to the flakes coating the green cone began to fall around me. It suffocated me for moments, then stopped. It started again. The more I was moved, the more it happened. It was torturous, and I was relieved when I was finally placed inside one of the squares I saw earlier. Something was placed over the square, and all I saw was darkness. But I didn’t mind, for it was a relief from the light.

Day 2

If I am being true with you, I’m not sure if this was really the second day. You see, I don’t really know what a day is. I’m just guessing here. But I will count the time from me being placed inside that dark square, to the time the light was let back in, to be one day in counting.

A being had towered over me as they opened the square I was in, which is apparently called a box. I later learned that the being was a human, specifically a girl, but at the time I saw it as a weird creature. A creature with cylinders similar to my sticks but thicker at its side, and similar but longer shapes at the end of it. These shapes at the end of the being seemed to allow it to move back and forth freely. The creature was small and short with pudgy shapes at the end of it’s sticks that were attached to their main rectangle. That’s how I saw it. With my knowledge now I realize that those were arms, legs, hands, and a torso. But how could I have known back then? 

The girl smiled at me and said, “My name is Marie. Nice to meet you Mr. Snowman.” I’m still not sure what a snowman is. She said it like that was what I was, but that’s such a strange name. I don’t like it. I much prefer the name Holly, thank you very much. The girl picked me up and moved me to a place similar to the one I had recalled from my first day of sight, only this one held so much more color and various shapes in different sizes. I was in awe as she set me on a weird platform and left me there as she went about her day.

Day 3

After those first confusing days I learned a few things. The place I was in was called a bedroom, and that Marie had special features that set her apart; like red hair, freckles, and big green eyes. Unfortunately, the foggy glass restricted me from getting a clear view of her. Marie had left through what’s called a door for most of what I presumed to be a day, which I could now tell by the light outside her window. When it’s bright and dark for a cycle, I think a day has passed. So from then on, I presumably knew what a day was, which was very helpful.

Anyways, Marie left and came back when the light was turning dark. She had puffy red eyes and a frown upon something she had later told me was a face. But when she saw me, her frown turned upside down and my snowy, yes apparently that white stuff is snow, which I guess explains the whole snowman thing- my snowy body seemed to warm with.. some feeling I couldn’t place. She had walked over to me and picked me up. She pressed something on the bottom of my glass cage and a blissful noise surrounded me. I had never heard such a brilliant sound before. It nearly beat Marie’s voice. A soothing melody had enveloped me in it’s song and I hadn’t minded the smile plastered on my face. It had a sort of calming essence, different from any other voice I had ever heard. Marie told me it was something called music. I loved it.

Day 10

Apologies for the skipage of days. Marie had bumped me and I was facing a wall for what I believe to be many days, which might I tell you is not a fun experience. So there isn’t much to tell about those days. Well.. except the fact I hit a bit of a low. I enjoyed Marie and her company; and her conversations about what she said was school, where she learned things. But I wished to see beyond this glass, to see what the world looked like without a tint. I wished to see her face clearly, and to venture beyond this room. I constantly wondered what her face would look like without any sort of distortion. Oh, and don’t get me started on her shaking me! She kept picking me up and jostling me back and forth and setting me back down, watching with a smile as I drowned in powdery snow. I suffocated and wished to cough and sputter but I couldn’t. Then she did it again. But I suppose I should be optimistic. When she shook me, she placed me down facing the room again, so I no longer had to suffer the painful loneliness of her wall. I guess another good thing was that she brought over what she called a friend that day. His name was Zak and he seemed quite nice. They seem to have a special connection and she kept telling me they were just friends. I’m not sure what she thought I heard her say, I knew they were friends; she’d told me a million times!

Day 20

Competition. Yes, you heard me right. On what I believe to be day 20 competition entered the room. You see, Marie came back to the room with this repulsive yet soft looking bear. And for a while, all she talked to was the bear. She hardly talked to me anymore. In all fairness, the bear looked very cuddly and maybe even cuter than me. But it hurt to see her ignore me so much. I had to listen to her talk to the bear about her day instead of hearing her talk to me. She smiled at me sometimes, but it just wasn’t the same. I’d never felt more envious.

Many days 

Sorry for the lack of accurate days. There was a period of time where I was back in the darkness of a box for so, so long. It seems Marie only leaves me on her nightstand when the weather outside her window matches the snow inside my glass sphere. During those dark days I lost count of how long I’d been there. But when she finally took me back out, things had changed. Marie was older now. She told me her and Zak broke up, maybe you know what that means? But that was one of the only things she said to me. She still had that stuffed bear but she grew tired of both of us. She pulled me out of the box and set me on her desk in the far corner. I noticed she didn’t put me on the nightstand like she used to. 

The more I looked around, the more I realized I may have been in the box longer than I thought. Marie looked more than a little different. Her hair was always curled and she had darker eyelashes than she had once before. Her room was different too. It was minimalist with bland colors that made me bored just looking at them. I missed her voice, specialized in a higher pitch just for me. Now all she did was talk to her little rectangle device which I heard her call a phone. It’s all she ever talked to, all she was ever on. My view of the room had begun to get worse, for dust was beginning to coat the glass. But Marie never bothered to wipe it off. I was.. forgotten. I’d never felt so lonely before. The issue is, the more she ignored me, the more desperate I grew to break free of the glass. To pound through the restricting walls and see what was on the other side without the distorted view. Maybe to walk, like Marie did, and to explore what was beyond this room. But I couldn’t move. And I knew I never would.

The last day

Today is the last day. I know this because I see Marie packing up her things into boxes, looking melancholy as she does so. I know soon she’ll pack me up. It’s been many days. Many, many days. The thing is, when she places me back in the darkness I don’t think I’ll have the strength to come back. I can’t handle the loneliness or the longing to break free anymore. So yes, today is the last day. That’s why I have been making a mental diary of my days in this room, starting from day 1. The days in the box. The good days, the bad days. It feels good to remember.

Marie walks over to me.  She picks me up and a tear pricks her big green eyes. She gives me a gentle shake and sets me down as she wipes off the dust gathered on my glass. A warm feeling blooms inside of me at the gesture as she gives me a sad smile. More tears follow the first and she picks me up once more, playing the melody I’d grown to adore. We seem to sit there forever, letting the soft music lull us into a daze. We stare into each other and if I could cry I would, but they would have been tears of joy. But her tears begin to blind her and she fumbles with me. 

She drops me. 

I’m falling. Time seems to slow as hundreds of emotions course through me. I don't know what feeling to isolate. Sadness? Joy? Anticipation? Perhaps I feel all three. This close to the floor I can see the grooves in the wood, and the fraying carpet to my left. I know what’s coming when I hit the ground. I shatter. The glass that kept me imprisoned for so long breaks away leaving me exposed to the air around me. All this time, this was all I ever wanted. To see the world for what it was without the tint of glass keeping me from it. But now, without the glass, I’m vulnerable. I can’t seem to catch a breath. The air inside that cage had kept me safe, kept me alive. Without it, I cannot survive. I wish I could. I wish I could do all the things I told myself I could if only I was free. But now I realize that it cannot be. I can’t walk, I can’t move, and now I can’t breathe. As the world fades out around me I see Marie’s red hair fall before my eyes. Today, on my last day, I see her face without the glass. It’s beautiful. Her hair seemed more vibrant than it had before, her green eyes shining like emeralds in a sea of perfection. I know she isn’t perfect, but at this moment it seems like maybe she is. My vision goes black, and I begin to fade away for good. But I don’t mind the smile I can’t wipe away. Because I am finally free.