The Beginning of the Loop

   I was running from something, I just didn’t know what. It was following me with an intense yellow glow. I could feel all my senses rushing back to me. I didn’t want to die, I didn’t want to be stuck here all my life, or at least what was left of it. I just didn’t want to be alone. That was what I was thinking after the reality shift, or at least that’s what I and the very few others that were involved called it. It all started a few years ago. I was 15 at the time. I remember sitting in my backyard underneath the patio roof. It was storming quite heavily. My mom was in the kitchen making Mac and cheese, which she always made to perfection, and my dad was somewhere in Michigan for work. I had a brother, however, he was in his room with a few of his friends which I don’t remember the names of. I could hear the sound of a bunch of tiny footsteps briskly making their way down the stairs. This was when the reality shift struck its first victim. “Hey, Jack’s mom, Jack’s mom!” They said frantically while tugging on her shirt.

“What is it?” She asked smiling, setting the ladle down. She was always kind hearted, so much so to the point where it sometimes backfired on her.

“Jacks gone, he just like, fell through the floor!” They cried worryingly. I was sure it was nothing. Maybe just a boy and his friends playing hide and seek. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I couldn’t have been more wrong.

“Oh did he now?” She says in a playful tone. She was oblivious to what really happened, just as I was. I was counting the seconds in between each lightning strike. It was extra ferocious that day.

“thirty-one, thirty-two, thirty-” I say before getting interrupted by a lightning strike, causing me to start over. All this counting was going to put me to sleep. I barely got any sleep the night before. Maybe like two to three hours, but that’s it. “One, two, three, four, five, six, seve-” I start counting, only for another one to strike. I should have stopped then. I should have just gotten up and went inside. But fate has its own ways of doing things. I began counting a third time. It was a while before this one went off.

“One hundred and fifty-two, one hundred and fifty-three, one hundred and fift-” I say. As soon as the third lightning strike hit, a bright yellow light flashed in front of my face, almost as if they were inside of my eyes. I could feel myself falling to god knows where. How I was falling, now that was an entirely different question. At first I was confused. “How could I be falling if I was just sitting on my chair a few seconds ago?” I thought to myself. Then, I was scared. I didn’t know what was happening, it was unknown, and I don’t like the unknown. It was a few seconds of falling before I really started to panic. I couldn’t see anything. It was as if my eyelids were being stitched shut. I could feel my stomach in my throat as I landed on what felt like a damp, thin carpet. Somehow seemingly unharmed, I opened my eyes to see the yellow mess that surrounded me. Yellow, I hated it. It had always been my least favorite color. I looked around to get a better view of my surroundings. The walls seemed to have an old wallpaper on them. The kind of wallpaper that your grandma would have in her 100 year old house. I flinched as I breathed through my nose, smelling nothing but the smell of mildew. As a matter of fact, the entire hallway felt wet, almost like a rain cloud fell from the sky and engulfed the air. That’s right, I forgot to mention that the place I somehow fell into was a long, skinny hallway with doorways that branched off of the sides.

I didn’t know where I was. I was scared. I tried to call out to someone. “Mom?” I yelled. The longer I sat there, the more I started to notice. For example, the hum buzz of the florescent lights was getting to my head. It felt like a swarm of bees was surrounding my head and I was the hive. “Ok, so I was sitting in my chair, then I somehow fell through the floor, and now I’m here; in this weird, damp yellow hallway” I say to myself. It all happened so quickly. One second I was sitting in the chair, counting the time in between each lightning strike, then the next in here, sitting on this moist, horrible smelling carpet. I take a second to process everything, just sitting there.

“I might as well try and look for other people,” I whisper to myself. I stand up quickly and start walking down the hallway. Peering down into the doorways that branch off of it, it’s just more hallways. I decided to turn down one of them. That was mistake number one. I then heard my brother calling out to me so I decided to follow the voice. “Jack, Jack is that you?” I yell back. That was mistake number two. I turned a corner, hoping to find him, just for it to be, well, not him. Something was in that room. I couldn’t see it, but I could feel it. My entire fight or flight response was triggered, and it was telling me to get the hell out of there. Whatever it was heard me. It followed me as I ran, its breath on my neck. But when I looked back, nothing was there. Not even the hallway that I just ran from. I slumped down against a wall and put my hands over my eyes.

“I haven’t even been here for ten minutes, but I already want to leave” I say to myself, my voice shaky. I was tired. I needed more sleep, my mind needed to catch up with my actions. My body stopped listening to me a little bit after I fell on the floor. “I need rest” I whispered to myself, my eyelids slowly closing until my vision was no more. I’m not one to admit when I cry, but it was so much that it feels like I can still feel the tears to this day. I don’t know how long I slept for, but I do remember the dream I had, for I still have it to this day. I was in a field of flowers. The flowers didn’t look real. They looked like the kind of flowers that a toddler would draw, with the green stem and the two leaves sticking out of each side. Yeah, that kind. A warm breeze shifted through the air. It was a calming sort of sensation. I felt free, completely forgetting about where I was. Then a bright, yellow light filled the air, which still wakes me up every time. After the yellow light infiltrated my dream, I woke up. It was sudden, but I was fully awake. I don’t know how long I slept for, but if I had to assume I guess it would be a few hours. When I looked up at the ceiling, one of the lights was extra bright. I stood up and then another light, which was further away from me turned extra bright as well. It was as if it was a dog that smelled a scent. it was leading me somewhere. I decided to follow it. Mostly because I didn’t have any better ideas at the time. Whenever I got to one light, another one ahead of me would grow brighter. It was guiding me somewhere. I wish I hadn’t followed it. When I finally got there, I just stood, for I didn’t know what else to do.

Tears started dropping from my eyes. In front of me lied my brother. He was motionless, so still in fact that he could be classified as a statue. I wasn’t sure of it at the time, but I am now. He was dead. He was as pale as a ghost. That’s not what gave it away though. What gave it away was the blood pouring out of his mouth, eyes, and stomach. I cried. Cried for what felt like an eternity. Sure, I still mourn his death to this day, but there’s nothing I could’ve done about it. The thing that pissed me off was that it just left him there, as if it was taunting me. I do have one regret, and that was leaving him there. I left quickly out of fear. I didn’t know what did that to him and I don’t want to find out. I ran out of there faster than I ever have, with the seemingly endless amount of tears flowing from my face. I was running from something, I just didn’t know what. It was following me with an intense yellow glow. I could feel all my senses rushing back to me. I didn’t want to die, I didn’t want to be stuck here all my life, or at least what was left of it. I just didn’t want to be alone. I looked back. That was mistake number four. Something was chasing me this time. It had two long legs, along with two long arms. “Mathew” It called out, its voice distorted and terrifying. What I didn’t like was that it sounded like a copied version of my brother’s voice.

“Mathew. Don’t leave me behind again” It called out again. I continued to cry while running.

“MATHEW DON’T LEAVE ME HERE ALONE” It yelled, its pace quickening.

“it’s not jack it’s not jack it’s not jack” I kept repeating to myself. By that point it just kept screaming at me, yelling at me not to leave it alone. I kept running. I ran until my legs could no longer support my weight. I eventually lost whatever it was. It didn’t lose hope searching for me though. I could hear it’s voice echoing throughout the labyrinth.

“Mathew” It called out. It was faint which was good. That meant that it was probably a decent distance away. As I sat against the wall once more, I eventually built up just enough strength to be able to begin walking at a slow pace, making sure to keep watch for whatever that creature was. As I was walking, I eventually walked into a large, open area. At the end of the room was a gray, metal looking exit door. I ran towards it, hoping for it to be an escape back to reality, back to my world. A part of me was thinking that my brother would be back at home, just playing with his friends. When I got to the door and tried to open it, the door was locked. “No no no” I whispered to myself. I turned my body sideways and started slamming my shoulder into the door, hoping that it would open. I kept slamming and slamming until my shoulder physically couldn’t slam anymore. I tried to slam one more time, but my shoulder dislocated. I put my back up against the door and slid down until I was sitting on the floor. I was crying. Partly from the pain and from not being able to get out of this hellhole. I was holding my shoulder. It hurt, a lot, but it didn’t hurt nearly as much as what my brother went through. It seemed like crying would be all I did while I was there. After sitting against the door, I started hearing sounds from the other side of the door. It sounded like someone was unlocking it.

I stood up quickly. As a matter of fact I don’t think I’ve ever stood up so quickly before. I looked at the door in anticipation. Once it unlocked I opened the door as quickly as I could, only for it to be my mom. I was confused but it didn’t matter. All that mattered to me was leaving that place right then and there. If only I hadn’t been so foolish. “Hello?” My mom asked.

“Mom, whats going on” I asked, hoping she would have an answer. Of course, I knew she wouldn’t have a clue. I was just ecstatic to see her.

“Is anyone there?” She asked once more, poking her head around to see from different angles.

“Mom? I’m right here” I say with tears still in my eyes. I go to walk into the house, only to get dragged backwards by my collar. More tears started flooding my eyes as my mom shut the door, seemingly oblivious to the sight that is happening right in front of her very eyes. My limbs go weak as I surrender to the creature. “You left me alone Mathew” It says, its voice still distorted. My eyelids fall and I black out, thinking it will be the last time I’m ever conscious, just to open my eyes to a stormy sky, thunder stomping to the ground. I quickly put my hand down and sat up, feeling the plastic chair beneath me. As I look down at my hands, my head starts to hurt as I try to remember what just happened. For some reason, It just would not come back to me. “Hey, Jack’s mom, Jack’s mom!” I heard a few boys say from inside. I quickly turn my head around, looking at the familiar sight in front of me.

“What is it?” My mom asked, setting the ladle she had in her hand down.

“Jacks gone, he just like, fell through the floor!” They cried worryingly. My gut sank. Right after they got done saying that, my gut had the most sickening feeling. I felt as if I was going to throw up. All the images and memories of Jack’s body started flooding through my head. “Oh did he now?” She said in a playful tone. She was oblivious to what really happened. I was praying I was wrong, that everything that happened was all just one big nightmare. I was praying that he was just playing hide and seek. I didn’t realize it at the time, but this was the first death of many. This was the first reset of the reality shift. Here I lie, the mind of a 23 year old in a 15 year body, unable to figure out how to get out of this loop. I stopped counting past 800 deaths. I found some others who are in the same boat as me, so at least I’m not alone. We formed a group called the Concluded Reality Sifters. I know I know, it sounds a little cheesy, but there’s no use in changing it now. Something that we found out is that we can remember most of what happened in our previous attempts. And yes, before you ask, I tried saving Jack, countless times in fact. However it was impossible, so I gave up. I wasn’t going to go chase something I knew couldn’t be done. The part that sends a shiver down my spine every time though is the fact that ever since the last few hundred deaths, Jacks body was nowhere to be found, meaning that something changed the reality shift. So here I lie, writing the story of the past eight years, or what could possibly be the rest of my life.