Damage Per Second

Trigger Warning (TW)/ Content Warning (CW): Adult Themes/ Language, Sexual Violence, Physical Violence

Damage Per Second

It had been hours ago last since glowing specks of dust glistened through the crooked branches of a terracotta home on a spring mountain. In place of the sun bleeding into the sky was a waning moon. Ms. Méng, a young, slim woman with long, dark hair like crow feathers, lived in those woods. She was hunting for mushrooms but stopped for a breather, admiring the city skyline from afar. Little did she expect that the lights in each section, one after another of that city, would shut off suddenly. And then, there was something else among the normal chirps of cicadas.

"Help us!" Screaming all around was heard. Then came about sounds of gravel kicking on the ground. Meters away was another young female carrying an electric v guitar strapped over her shoulder. Ms. Méng approached her, concerned after seeing scratches on her face and dirt on her clothes.

"Is everything okay?" She asked. The lady in front of her was out of breath.

"We have to get away from here," the lady said erratically. Smoke was coming from multiple areas when they both looked to the horizon.

"Come on, let's go someplace safer," Ms. Méng suggested, moving the young woman's arm around her shoulder for support. After a few minutes of walking, they arrived at a house with muted shades of cerulean blue. Inside were timber furniture, woven rugs, and an unlit fireplace. Ms. Méng gestured for the woman to sit, and so she did after resting her electric v guitar on the coffee table.

"Thank you," said the stranger. Looking around, she saw the moonlight gilding the sign of its rise in the shine across the walls and tiled floors. Unveiled was a composition of two conjoining monochrome canvases among abstract perforations layered over the wainscot wallpaper.

"I'm Méng Tè Yôu," she introduced.

"It's beautiful. What does it mean?" Charlie requested.

"Unique dream. And yours?" Once Ms. Méng could get a fire going, she began to see the girl more clearly.

"Charlie Jin Gu. Mind if I call you Tay?" Charlie asked. She had a heart-shaped face, broad cheekbones, and short, pink hair that narrowed at the jawline.

"Sure," Ms. Méng consented. Befitting her typically passive nature, Charlie remained of relatively a modest build. As She peered out to the window recess, she took notice of her solemn expression in the reflection on the glass.

"Everything is strange. We just met, but you remind me of someone I know. You look a bit like my friend." Once Charlie had said this, Tay's eyes lit up.

"Tell me about her," Tay said, holding Charlie's hand to comfort her.

"I came to know her for a couple of months, and in the short time we had together, I understood her more. But, gosh, she was so beautiful. She's different now from when I met her." Charlie started coughing dryly.

"Let me bring you something," Tay said before leaving for the kitchen. It was not long for her to return with a tray of empty wine glasses, a bottle full of crisp white burgundy champagne, a tall glass of water, and servings of thin, sautéed, wheat flour Russian pancakes that formed a casing for caviar.

"Well, don't you live fancy?" Charlie joked after drinking some water.

"It's nice to have. You don't have to eat it if you're not hungry," Tay smiled.

"Do you live here?"

"Since the day I was born. I share these forests willingly, accepting a selected few into my home and, on occasion, calling them my friend. I'm all alone now, but this land belonged to my family long before. And to think that such a civilization flourished until the last war, yet for untold ages, was forgotten by the centuries. I'm a direct descendant of an ancient tribe. My great-grandparents had this home built here when they were pregnant," Tay reminisced.

"What happened?"

"Everyone seemed instead possessed with a deeply seated desire to find their solace. So it's no surprise that they're great healers and were willing to aid all sorts of creatures, partly due to their nature and perhaps because it helps them find their solace in reconciling for mistakes of the past. Despite that, however, their blood has been significantly tainted in recent memory," Tay explained as she poured herself half a glass of champagne. "Though we proved capable of putting a decisive halt to the onslaught of the war, we had nothing else but our lives; therefore, we withdrew to our ancestral forests and secluded our culture from the city."

"I'm sorry," Charlie apologized.

"Well. For as long as everyone remembers, our ways have revolved around an intimate connection to the natural forces and stood as highly spiritual and pragmatic people. We are people who dedicated our individual lives and the very organization of their entire society to protect the safety and balance of the natural world. Before the war's conclusion, our society was divided by gender, with most women serving as highly skilled huntresses. The roles more or less defined our culture for ten thousand years. In the years since the end of the war, this gender division has ended in favor of more practical concerns, setting aside its historical strictures on membership. As a result, masses of eager, intelligent women have taken up the mantle. But enough about me. What about your friend?" Tay redirected the conversation to Charlie.

"The last time I ate with her, we had spiced bread with a lemon herb marinade and a fizzed ale with a unique blend of brewed sarsaparilla and spiced rum. Did you know that the process of chewing was no different from the beating of a heart?"

"No," Tay spoke quietly. The only sounds present were tapping metal spoons against the plates until she clicked her tongue and decided to break the silence. "What did she look like?" When Tay asked this, Charlie puckered her lips, shaking her head.

"She had fringed, choppy layers of hair with wispy bangs. It's stylish for hiding bald spots if someone is yanking your hair." Charlie bit her lip several times. "Our hardships were different. I had to secure a humble status in my adoptive family. She had to do it with her damn fiance. I've lived in places I couldn't afford, eaten what didn't belong to me, and attended schools that never truly accepted me. And her fiance needn't worry. He always dealt with whatever he had followed by struggles that wouldn't leave. And I'm surprised. Over nine years have passed since they got together. Yet, three days after the wedding, he already began downgrading her." Charlie's eyes looked glassy.

"I'm stronger than I look. So if you point this son of a bitch out to me, I'll take care of the rest." Tay challenged. Charlie continued to shake her head no as she gasped.

"In her last words, she told me she tasted confession, admitting to herself the things she could not reclaim when he took her childhood in his stride. She was addicted to the bittersweetness of their romantic tragedy and tried convincing me her heart never broke because it was never whole, to begin with, and that was some bullshit. She said she would always finish whatever he started because she wanted to get it over with, but I haven't gone blind today."

"Her last words?" Tay's expression appeared skeptical. "Did he kill her?" She raised her voice, speaking firmly. Her face was stern. Charlie seemed not to want to say anything else.

"I came back to see her because I was worried after the announcement on the news about a nationwide blackout." And Charlie stood very still as if not only lost in thought but stuck in place as well.

"Is that what's going on? I saw the lights turn off from up here."

"Don't you know?" Charlie asked. Feeling there was more to the situation than what was said, Tay left the room for a moment before returning with a patrolman radio. "Is that a Pro-48? 4-band?? You sure take your analog lifestyle seriously." Ignoring the banter, Tay plugged in the scanning receiver, turning on the unit.

"My people were typically honorable and just but distrust other people around the world, which has shaped us into a very self-sufficient, yet, self-conscious people, so we cannot help ourselves, often displaying strong streaks of such isolationism. However, to this day, we take pride in helping our allies; many of us are great healers. So if I were you, I would be careful with what I say. You never know. I could be your ally," Tay warned as she pressed the program button, then keyed in the frequency. As she advanced through, she finally found the news channel.

"Help us," was heard through the radio in the background. The spokeswoman described the scene regarding an individual who had sustained irreversible cessation of circulatory and respiratory functions due to injuries from a riot around downtown as 'horrific.' Tay and Charlie listened intently, hearing the imminence of what would be the apocalypse.

"I didn't know what would happen when I went to see her," Charlie wept. "The front door was left open a quarter of the way, and I saw her up the stairs, a few steps away from me. My friend was climbing up the stairway. Bruises sat on her hips and shoulder. Her hair was dull. She was wearing the sleeveless tulle dress I gave her for her birthday. The light-colored foliage aligned with the shoulder straps had blood; the high-waist fine net fabric had uneven ruffles. I did it, Tay. I killed her." Charlie started to cry, unable to hold back the tears she had been holding hostage.

"Are you serious?" Tay questioned, flabbergasted.

"She crawled halfway up as stillborns, protruding from underneath her slip and still tethered to the mother's body by the umbilical cord, slipped and fell onto each step. Her abdomen appeared large and complete, and areas of her skin were tinged purple and pink. More of her hair and nails were even exposed. I had to, Tay. Even after her death, I learned more about her. I didn't know she was pregnant. If only I had been there for her." Charlie's head lowered as she looked to the ground where her feet were.

"You gave her mercy," Tay argued. "You probably have a better idea of who killed her. However, I can see you in the same strength, honor, and spirit that endeared them to me. Your friend would call you her champion if you value the ferocity to overcome all odds."

"No. I didn't want to. But I didn't know what else to do. My friend's mouth was wide open as if to sink her teeth into me. I ended up on the ground when she noticed me, trying to push her away," Charlie argued.

"Listen. If you knew what would happen, you don't get to take the blame. But how you feel is valid. No one gets to skip the mourning process. I used to think the same. Even though my ancestors were dismissive of intruders on their territory, and whom they consider to either be living in stubborn ignorance [for war-mongering and the destruction of nature] or as too short-lived ever to attain the responsibility and wisdom which they've gained through their burdened past. In turn, many of these younger cultures would perceive this tribe's attitude as one of mere arrogance or superiority. I understand, if not for their secretive nature, then their aloof judging demeanor. However, after all the sacrifices they have endured to keep their lands free of destruction or bondage, they aren't fond strangers. Many found arrows in their chest before they knew danger lurked about them. You're very fortunate not to have one in yours." Grabbing a box of tissues, Tay gestured for Charlie to grab it.

"My intent may be one-sided. I don't know. It all feels unreal, like the effects of a reverie, hazes of what couldn't be distinguished too suddenly when first opening our tired eyes, and how blotches of color often appeared before falling asleep. I remember we would passively watch them and be taken to the fabric of sleep as random images sometimes appeared in our heads," Charlie continued, taking a few tissues in hand. "One of the scariest things about this? It didn't feel intimidating."

"I could tell your friend sought an audience to offer that she and her fiance put their differences aside and combine their resources and skills to prepare for the challenges. However, it's easier said than done. And I also know it's in our best interest to do what we can to survive. Time is of the essence. If this is what becomes of the city, we cannot stay here," Tay motioned.

"Where would we go?" Charlie asked, now having calmed down. "You seem surprisingly too level-headed for this," She speculated.

"You could say I'm superstitious. But I have been preparing for this day since the old days when my father told me stories in bed about the dead coming to life. That is not necessarily the case. Like everyone, I will think it's a virus. Nobody dies immediately. Follow me if you wish, but it'll be to the ends of the Earth." Charlie looked up at Tay with admiration in her eyes. Although she didn't know where her journey would take her, it didn't end on the doorstep of her dead friend. Tay gathered over-the-counter meds and other materials, putting them in a duffle bag while Charlie recollected herself. Eventually, they both stepped out.

It had been hours ago last since glowing specks of dust glistened through the crooked branches of a terracotta home on a spring mountain. In place of the sun bleeding into the sky were clouds of smoke, polluting from the city afar.