Submitted to: Contest #304

Fever

Written in response to: "Write a story in which the first and last words are the same."

Drama Historical Fiction Romance

Fever

Fever. Feel it in the air. Lawd! It's hot. Louisiana hot on a summer Saturday night. Not a breath of a breeze. Sultry. Like trying to inhale a sponge.

Gossamer iridescent wings of dragonflies helicopter above clouds of gnats hanging low above the muddy waters of the wide Mississippi. Mosquitoes hatch and blacken the tall marsh grasses in the ditches still sodden with flood waters from the last downpour. Bullfrogs croak as if they are dying, poisonous snakes slither unseen, gators lie in wait with only their beady eyes peering above the waterline in the bayou. Cypress knees stretch toward the dripping Spanish moss curtaining the swamp. All is limp in the humidity as the cicadas chirp their mating calls and the fireflies signal their mates back dropped by the lush green lawns falling into shadows.

The sun has done its best to wilt the withers of the sturdiest team of draft animals pulling the plow blades through the sludge of mud and roots hoping to encourage a new crop to rise again out of the humus mire. Now it has sunk into the haze to the west still shimmering with the lingering heat. And a new fever burns.

The young field foreman has busted his tail all week fighting nature and circumstances to deserve this evening off. He splashes tepid water over his face, head and shoulders trying to cool his heated skin. His chiseled biceps flex and tense as the water sizzles attempting the impossible. Sweat still beads across his furrowed brow and down his broad back. His tongue is swollen yearning for that first drink. Even his teeth sweat. Lawd! It's hot. And his fever is growing.

He carries his one clean shirt into town and stops to put it on before entering the saloon. Makes no difference. Thanks to the stifling atmosphere inside its immediately streaked with sweat and soon the underarms show the damage. The pretty barmaid brings him his usual and he awards her with his dazzling smile and an extra tip. She thanks him and adds a kiss to his temple. Aha! Maybe he could get lucky tonight. He swells at the prospect as he watches her sashay away.

His best buddy claps him on his sticky back and warns, “Don't even imagine it, Old Chum. She belongs to that mad man, Hosea. He'll have you face down eating dust before you could pull it out of your britches.”

“You're right, of course. The only thing is I've got this fever...”

“Don't we all. Gotta drown it with another round. I'll buy this one. Be right back. Don't get it caught in a wringer while I'm gone.”

Then the unsuspecting lover boy saw her. A vision. The smoke parted and there she stood. A halo surrounded her. The heat shimmered in her wake. A breath of fresh air. A hint of sweet smelling jasmine lingered in her aura. He rose and drifted on the scent until he stood before her.

“Um. You aren't from around here, are you? Musta hurt when you fell.”

“What are you talking about?” Her voice tinkled like wind chimes.

“When you fell from heaven. Did it hurt?”

“Oh, that old line.”

“You look like an angel to me. Care to join me for a drink so I can discover the truth?”

“Well, I was only waiting for my godfather. He said he would be out in a second. That was a half-hour ago.”

“My name is 'Gosh', I mean 'Josh', 'Joshua' but friends call me 'Josh'. Please be my friend and call me 'Josh'. What's your godfather's name? Maybe I know him and can help you find him.”

“'Tuttle' 'Merle Tuttle' is his name.”

“You mean 'Merle the Turtle'? He looks exactly like a turtle so we kids... Oh, you know how kids can be, sorry. I'll help you look. Do you have a name other than 'Angel'?”

“Actually, 'Angela' is my name.”

“I knew it had to be true. You're so pretty, you have to be an angel. No one around these parts look anything like you. Red-flaming hair like silk and green eyes so intense they burn from within. All I could think was 'Gosh, how beautiful she is.' Care to sit here and have a drink while I look in the men's room. This is my buddy, 'Buddy'. This is 'Angela'. Yeah, I know, like an angel and I saw her first. I'm gonna look for her escort. Be right back.”

Angela watched Josh as he disappeared down a hallway. Yeah, it was hot in here. She felt the fever. Buddy handed her a sweet tea. “Thanks. I'm not a beer fan.”

“I thought that may be more to your likin'. Not many ladies choose to drink beer.”

“What makes you think I'm a lady?”

“Oh, you're a lady, all right. Even I can recognize one when I see one. And don't go breakin' my friend's heart. He's got the fever real bad. He needs a lady to cool it down about now. Here he comes back again.”

“No Mr. Tuttle back there. He must be getting treatment for the fever.” Josh glanced up the curved stairway to the balcony above. “We'll have to cool our heels down here waitin' for him.”

Angela fished an ice cube out of her drink. “Lawd, it's hot!” She smoothed it over her forehead, around her neck and to the top of the low neckline of her sundress where it melted dripping the remains down her enticing cleavage. The eyes of both guys followed every drop wishing they could lick up the wet dew. Lawd! It's hot!

Buddy swallowed audibly. “Speaking of fever. I hears it's a spreading down N'awlins way. Comes in on all those foreign ships. Spreadin' like wildfire. Hundreds are a dying. Eyes turn yeller and gums bleed then...” He cut his finger across his throat.

“Oh, Lawd, no! I heard it happened years ago and thousands died. How do we stop it from happening here?”

“Quarantine the only way. We gots to put up road blocks and not let anyone come this way. Our lives depend on it. Let's get up some volunteers. There's work to do and we've got a big enemy. You can feel it in the air.”

“Lawd, it's hot!” Angela declared again.

The two guys cried out together, “Fever!”

Posted May 29, 2025
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42 likes 36 comments

Rebecca Lewis
15:02 May 29, 2025

This story sweats. It’s got that thick, Southern heat that clings to your skin and makes everything feel a little dangerous. It’s sensual without being soft — rough around the edges in the right kind of way. You’ve got heat from lust and heat from fever all tangled up together, and that’s just plain good storytelling. If I had to put it plain-
It’s hot, sticky, and humming with hunger — the kind that makes you look twice at a woman, and the kind that makes your gums bleed.

Reply

Mary Bendickson
16:21 May 29, 2025

Awesome comment. Exactly what I was going for. Thank you.

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Iris Silverman
20:54 Jun 05, 2025

I second this!!!!

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My Warame
18:42 Jun 06, 2025

I loved it.

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Ken Cartisano
17:25 Jun 06, 2025

This seems like a slice from a larger pie.

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Mary Bendickson
17:27 Jun 06, 2025

Not yet. Maybe think about it.

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Victor Amoroso
14:46 Jun 06, 2025

This story is thick with heat that makes them eggs sizzle on your ole frying pan left on the stove. Lawd it's hot!

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Mary Bendickson
15:35 Jun 06, 2025

And I like your comment😁

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03:32 Jun 06, 2025

You have such a great voice, love it!

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Mary Bendickson
12:10 Jun 06, 2025

Thanks.😊

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Iris Silverman
20:55 Jun 05, 2025

I love the descriptions in this story.

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Mary Bendickson
00:15 Jun 06, 2025

Thank you.

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Philip Ebuluofor
19:46 Jun 05, 2025

It started and ended just well. Don't even know whether am back or not. You are the first in two and half month. It started and ended well.

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Mary Bendickson
00:11 Jun 06, 2025

Thank you and welcome back if you start entering again. I keep saying I need to focus elsewhere but keep at this.

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Philip Ebuluofor
11:37 Jun 16, 2025

At times a brief hiatus can do much more good.

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Mary Bendickson
13:01 Jun 16, 2025

Of course.😊

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18:30 Jun 04, 2025

I could feel the sultry heat coming straight out of this. Great descriptions that brought the whole piece to life and made me feel like I was there!

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Ty Pape
23:43 Jun 03, 2025

Crisp and poetic writing that combines sweet and spicy dialogue into a sweltering tale.

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18:14 Jun 03, 2025

Your descriptions of all the Mississippi critters immediately captured me. I love describing nature too.

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Mary Bendickson
22:05 Jun 03, 2025

Thanks.

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John Rutherford
06:27 Jun 02, 2025

Hot piece.

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Mary Bendickson
13:08 Jun 02, 2025

Thanks🥵

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Dustin Finamore
17:18 Jun 01, 2025

I live in Gulfport Missippi (about an hour from NOLA and you nailed the atmosphere. I really enjoyed this entire story. I feel like the MC was the atmosphere itself. The overlap of lust and plague was so well done. Awesome job!!!!!!!!!

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Mary Bendickson
19:22 Jun 01, 2025

Cooool!!!

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Helen A Howard
14:42 Jun 01, 2025

Lovely details and descriptions (especially the second paragraph), and you know I always like it when your stories have a steamy element.

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Mary Bendickson
19:21 Jun 01, 2025

Thanksssssst.

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Kim Olson
06:56 May 31, 2025

Great story! Very atmospheric. Could really feel the heat! I hope it's part of a larger work and continues.

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Mary Bendickson
12:47 May 31, 2025

Not yet but maybe...
Thanks.

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Kristi Gott
06:48 May 30, 2025

The sensory details make this vivid and the descriptions make the story come alive. Well told!

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Mary Bendickson
14:24 May 30, 2025

Thanks😊

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Diamond Keener
01:46 May 30, 2025

Not as a resident but as a frequent visitor of the Deep South I think you really captured the atmosphere. Felt very tangible, great work!

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Mary Bendickson
14:23 May 30, 2025

Thanks😊

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Chris Miller
18:00 May 29, 2025

Hi Mary. You create a very strong sense of place and atmosphere in this one.

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Mary Bendickson
00:08 May 30, 2025

Thanks. Glad you like it steamy.

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Alexis Araneta
17:34 May 29, 2025

Hot in every single way! The details here are gorgeous! Lovely work!

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Mary Bendickson
00:08 May 30, 2025

Thanks. Some like it hot!🥵

Reply

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