Christmas Parade

At the Christmas parade, the beating was so harmonious and enchanting, and I don’t mean the drums from the marching band. The sparkle was so bright, brighter than all the Christmas lights combined. I felt as tall as the clouds in the sky. While we embraced it, made art like the golden hour color palette that glows in the evening twilight. Filled with pinks, oranges, and blues melting together like my body. I embraced him for as long as I could. “It’s been so long Jainey, how good it is to have you in my arms.” James said in a buttery tone. “So good to be home, I’ve never forgotten how many great times we’ve spent back here.” I say while sweat whips from my brow and the butterflies in my tummy began to tango. “I’m hosting a dinner party at my restaurant, tonight at 7, I’d love for you to stop by,” James proposed. “I won’t miss it!” Flies faster than the speed of light from my lips. The rest of the parade was background noise. I couldn’t focus on anything else except being back in his arms. The smell of his skin and the way it warmed me up like as if I were sunbathing on the coast of Cannes had me intoxicated. I headed to the mall to find the perfect outfit and managed to find a beautiful dress, then off to do my makeup and hair. I called my niece to assist me with getting the best look. “Judy, I haven’t felt this way in a long time, I stopped taking pride in my appearance, the only makeup I wore was to conceal the nights of torment.” I mumbled as a tear dropped on my new dress. “Aunt Jainey, you deserve the best and your happiness matters, I will make sure you feel beautiful!” Joan echoed with passion and perkiness. By the time she was finished, I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror. I was so nervous to go meet with James. I got all my Fitbit steps in as I contemplated going, but I couldn’t miss the feeling of being beside him, even if it were only for a few moments. Furthermore, I had to go. The restaurant was so full of charm. The tall pillars remained intact, strong enough to endure the test of time, and the rest of the exterior was covered in luscious green ivy. The sconces glowed with a real flame like the one in my eyes. The soft brushes hitting the snare contrasted with the bellowing of the saxophone, playing a love call of high and low emotions. “They need your portrait in the Louvre,” James whispered in my ear, vibrating down my spine. He escorted me to a table on a balcony with a faint scent of sea salt that filled the air and waves that shuffled back and forth from high tide. We gazed at the ocean and then a sharp knife cut the silence, “What happened?” James abruptly asks. “We were so close, so in love and then you just up and left me, this town and all the things I thought mattered the most. I was devastated.” I tried to hold back the tears like a levy and I faintly whimpered “I’m so sorry, “I made the choices I made, and I can only think, that was the path that was meant for me. The road leading me back here, to this very second in time, was a beautiful nightmare. Filled with so much turbulence it’d scare the bravest soul. But I can tell there is a God because after all that, here I am sitting in front of the love of my life. James, I’ve never stopped loving you and I want to live my days with you by my side.” We both cry to the tune of our sorrows and hopes, the sounds of the party fade out of our consciousness and are replaced with crickets chirping and the click-clacks of horses. We cozy up in the back of the horse stable, where we shared many firsts. After the last sip of merlot, the evening finished and the new day began in his bed. “I missed my flight, but I’m not mad.” I began to say while stroking his cheek like I used to do. “Let’s make the best of it, I have a place you’d love to see.” I pinched myself to make sure this lucid dream was real, each moment the last couple of days were like being a kid at their favorite amusement park on their favorite ride wanting one more go. When we arrived at the art gallery, my rose colored glasses grew rosier. Then, a gray cloud loomed over James and a thunderous voice rang from it, “Jaaaammmmes!?” “You didn’t come home last night, what were you doing? Wait, well, look what got drug back to town, Jainey the tramp.” Annett shouted. “We are separated, woman! And headed for a divorce, it’s not required of me to go to that house and be with you! James continued with his rant, “Ha! You’re calling her a tramp, you’re the one who slept with my dad!” Annette, clams up, like she’s about to be steamed. And scurried out of the gallery like a stray cat. I asked James, “are you ok? I didn’t know you were dealing with any of this.” James pored his heart out over the next several hours. There was one more thing James hadn’t mentioned before, he was terminally ill, and the doctor only projected that he’d live for another year. This news was like being stuck in a tube without oxygen. I couldn’t believe that we lost so much time together and now that we’ve been blessed by fate to reconnect, our time would be cut short once more. We decided to do it now. All of our dreams and wants, needed to be tended to with urgency. The next year was spent skydiving and sailing, trying exotic foods and old ones we loved, viewing new parts of the world and new parts of each other. We picked up and never looked back. We didn’t let our circumstances define our destiny together. When James took his last breath, we no longer had any regrets.