Sammidges and Hockey Pencils

Submitted into Contest #76 in response to: Write a story told exclusively through dialogue.... view prompt

5 comments

Kids Sad Fiction

Sammidges and Hockey Pencils

Good morning, Allison.

Good morning.

Can you tell me your full name and age, please?

Allison Lynn McCoy. I’m seven years old.

My name is Mr. Davies. I’m the Superintendent of Schools. Do you know what that is?

No.

That’s okay. I’m sort of the boss of all the schools.

Okay.

Your parents said I could talk to you today. Do you know why I want to talk to you?

No, sir. Am I in trouble?

Not at all. I’m talking to all the kids in your class, because I need your help.

Okay.

 Let’s start with an easy question. What grade are you in?

I am in grade 2. In Ms. Coulter’s class.

Do you like Ms. Coulter?

Yes. She is nice, and fun. Mrs. Thorne in grade one was nice too but not fun.

What makes Ms. Coulter nice, and fun, Allison?

She is pretty and she gives stickers and she dresses up. One time she made a treasure hunt in the school yard and I found a fossil, and one time she dressed up like a goose and we weren’t supposed to know it was her but it was her.

That does sound like fun. Anything else?

I want her to come back.

Do you think she is a fair teacher? You know what fair means, don’t you?

Yes sir. She is fair. She treats everyone the same. She won’t listen to tales.

What do you mean, “She won’t listen to tales?”

Like if somebody didn’t change their outdoor shoes you can’t tell on them. “I don’t want to hear it,” she says.

Why do you think she says that?

I don’t know.

Okay. I want to ask you about Ben. Did she treat Ben fairly?

Ben was in the other reading group, in Mrs. Jackson, the special teacher’s class.

But he was in your class for some subjects, right?

Yes. Gym. Art.

Do you like Ben?

No. He has a mean face and one time he pushed me when we were lining up for music. Melanie sits by him in, and she says he smells.

Melanie Greene?

Yes. She says he picks his nose. And he doesn’t brush his hair and he’s disgusting.

So, you aren’t friends with Ben?

No.

Who is Ben’s friend?

I don’t know. Nobody plays with him. He plays on the green bars by himself.

What about Ms. Coulter? Does she like Ben?

I guess so. She plays soccer with him at recess sometimes. And she put his truck picture on the door so we could all see it. She said it was awesome.

How did Ben feel about that?

He smiled.

Was it awesome?

I guess. But it was just pencil not crayons.

Do you know why Ben got in trouble, Allison?

He stole Raymond’s sammidges.

How do you know that?

I know.

Did you see him do that?

Yes. I was in for recess because I have a bad cold and my mom wrote a note. I was making plasticine animals. Ms Coulter said I could.

Did Ben stay in for recess too, Allison?

No. He sneaked in. He had his coat on for outdoor recess.

And then what?

He came in, and he looked in the cubbies and he took the sammidges out of Raymond’s cubby.

Did he see you?

Not at first, but then he did, and he just looked mean at me.

Did he say anything to you?

No. He stood there and ate one sammidge, and then he stuffed the other one in his jacket pocket. It was peanut butter.

Did you say anything to him?

I told him I’m telling the teacher.

And you told Ms. Coulter, right?

I went right to the secretary and she got Ms Coulter out of the staff room.

And what did she do?

She doesn’t like tales, but she said I did the right thing.

Then what happened?

I guess she told the princibul.

How do you know that?

After recess, the intercom said, “Ben Running Bear, come to the office.” He got the strap.

Did Ms. Coulter go with him?

Yes. Mrs. Jackson looked after us. Then they came back.

How was Ben when he came back?

 Ben wasn’t crying, but Ms. Coulter was. She told us to put our heads down on our desks for a while.

How did you feel about that?

I was sad.

And then what happened?

The principal came and yelled at everybody and said that stealing was bad and if anyone steals, they get the strap.

What did you think about that?

Stealing is bad.

Okay I have a couple more questions. It’s about the hockey pencils that were taken out of your teacher’s desk.

I know Raymond took them.

How do you know that?

He gave one to Jared and one to me.

Why did he do that?

I don’t know. I don’t even want a stupid hockey pencil.

Is Raymond your friend, Allison?

No! I don’t like boys!

Raymond told me you were his friend.

I play at his house sometimes because my mom is friends with his mom. And we go to the same Sunday school. And he’s on my soccer team.

Do you like to go to Raymond’s?

I guess so. They have a trampoline and a pool. His sister, Angie, she’s twelve and real nice.

Did Raymond get the strap for stealing the hockey pencils?

No.

Why not?

The princibul said Raymond just borrowed them.

Did Ms Coulter say that too?

I don’t know. She was in the hallway with the princibul and they were yelling and then Ms Coulter came in the class and just sat at her desk staring at us.

Did she say anything?

No. She was crying.

She didn’t say anything?

We were all just staring back at her, and some of us were crying too and then she said, “You are all very special to me. I have to go now.”

Is that all?

She said she will never forget us.

Then what happened?

She left, and then the princibul was our teacher and now we have Mrs….I forget.

Thank you, Allison. You have been very helpful.

You’re welcome. Bye.

January 09, 2021 17:10

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5 comments

Cally Howell
16:49 Jan 20, 2021

This is fantastic! The dialogue is very natural, and there were plain differences between the "Superintendent of Schools" and Allison. The story and theme were really well executed. I loved Allison's voice and how she told her tale. A few things: At the beginning, maybe have Allison say "Morning" or "Mornin' ". It shows a greater contrast between her and the Superintendent, and it gives the opening a bit more variety. "That’s okay. I’m sort of the boss of all the schools." This is a great line that makes me like the Superintendent and give...

Reply

18:09 Jan 20, 2021

So nice to hear from you and your positive comments are encouraging. Thanks for your ideas. I really appreciate it. Just so you know, this is a true story ( until the ending) and the Supt was a wonderful man who loved kids. He actually convinced me not to quit teaching.

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18:09 Jan 20, 2021

So nice to hear from you and your positive comments are encouraging. Thanks for your ideas. I really appreciate it. Just so you know, this is a true story ( until the ending) and the Supt was a wonderful man who loved kids. He actually convinced me not to quit teaching.

Reply

Show 0 replies
18:09 Jan 20, 2021

So nice to hear from you and your positive comments are encouraging. Thanks for your ideas. I really appreciate it. Just so you know, this is a true story ( until the ending) and the Supt was a wonderful man who loved kids. He actually convinced me not to quit teaching.

Reply

Cally Howell
18:37 Jan 20, 2021

That makes it all the better. I love it.

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